Animes Unite
by VideoGameAddict237
Summary: After years out of the limelight, various anime characters come together for a reality television show documenting their day to day lives as they live together in a giant house. Watch as these characters experience trials, tribulations and all around craziness and manage to keep their sanity. Mega anime crossover. Rated M for violence, language, and adult situations.
1. Introduction

**Hello everybody! Well, after much time away and off in a very distant land, I am back and with a fresh new story that I've been working on for a full year!**

 **This is a giant parody series based in a reality TV format that focuses on several anime characters from series that are underrated or popular series that have ended.**

 **These characters all live together in a giant house and go through various trials and tribulations each day, though let's just say...these trials aren't exactly normal.**

 **Hope you guys enjoy.**

 **WARNING: Violence, adult language, adult themes and mature content.**

 **Introduction**

NARRATOR: Let's ask the question. Just because a character was in a series that got cancelled, does that automatically make them a has-been? If you don't know the answer to that, that's fine because a lot of people don't. Some people just move on with their lives, others transition, and others just fall down the slippery slope. But in anime series, what happens to all those loveable characters you once looked at when you watched a series? Well that's about to be revealed. I'm your unseen narrator and this is Animes Unite! Here on this show we gather the list of your favorite anime characters from all your favorite series gathered together for this one show. And we got them all here from Bleach, Code Geass, Haruhi Suzumiya, Gurren Lagann, Chobits, Neon Genesis Evangelion, Fullmetal Alchemist, Blue Exorcist and Eureka Seven. On this show, all these characters will be living together and going through day to day problems and tasks as they attempt to try and find a way to move on from their pasts. Now just a little warning to a lot of the fans of these character's original shows. They may end up being widely different from how they were in their respective series, but please bear with us. Now then, let's introduce them all.

 _Bleach_

NARRATOR: Here today we have Rukia Kuchiki, Orihime Inoue, and Ichigo Kurosaki from the popular series Bleach. The anime series of Bleach ended in 2012 and the manga series it was based on ended very recently in late 2016. But today, these three characters decided to take part in this show after four years of living off the manga series following the anime series ending. Hello you three.

ICHIGO: Hello everybody.

RUKIA: Hi.

ORIHIME: What's up?

(They are all very different. Ichigo looks much more approachable and has a friendly tone. Rukia seems very shy looking and has a much gentler tone of voice. Orihime's voice is a lot deeper and she also has no noticeable breasts in her chest area)

NARRATOR: Well anyway, so how have times been for all of you since Bleach ended?

ICHIGO: I can't lie that it has been difficult considering that was our show, but it's better to not look back so much on the past. Bleach was a great show to work on, and I hold a lot of fond memories, but we have to face facts that it's ended and there's nothing we can do about it.

RUKIA: Yeah, it was very sad. I miss a lot of those times we had, and all the friends we made.

ORIHIME: (bored) Eh, whatever. It was fun while it lasted, but what's done is done. Not everything goes on forever.

NARRATOR: You know, I find it really astounding how different you all are from how the series portrayed you. Ichigo you seem like you're a super nice guy.

ICHIGO: I am. But the show has caused people to have a lot of preconceptions. I always looked super pissed off on the show and because of that a lot of people are scared to approach me on the streets. It may seem like a bummer, but I actually like it as it keeps thugs off my back.

NARRATOR: Hmm, very interesting. Also Rukia, you seem a little bit quiet there. Are you feeling alright?

RUKIA: (nervously) No, I'm not really too fond of cameras. They make me feel like I'm being watched.

ORIHIME: Yeah, we should've mentioned earlier, but she's super camera shy. We had to keep them hidden when we did scenes with her on Bleach.

NARRATOR: Oh, we're sorry. Well, if you want us to Rukia, we'll keep the cameras hidden so you'll feel more comfortable.

RUKIA: (smiles) Thank you, that would be nice.

NARRATOR: And now Orihime. I have to say you're radically different than how I remember you on Bleach.

ORIHIME: Oh yeah, I am way far off from how they made me out to be.

NARRATOR: I could tell from the second I heard your voice. I didn't know your voice was naturally low.

ORIHIME: Yep. I had to pitch it up super high when we did Bleach, and believe me it was very hard to maintain. I had to practice every single time before I went to filming. And for what? So they could make me sound like the…(cutesy voice) bubbly, ditsy, girl next door with the big boobies…(normal voice) bull…fucking…shit!

ICHIGO: Woah language!

NARRATOR: I take it you're not too fond of the show Orihime.

ORIHIME: No, I like the show, but I don't like how they made me. I kept getting told over and over again, "you're going to get stronger, you're going to become a badass, you're going to get even better." But no! They went and made me into possibly one of the most annoying anime characters ever! They had me say things that made me look like a fucking moron and when they weren't doing that, they used me as fanservice! Every time I'd walk down the streets, there'd always be comments about my appearance or how stupid I am! Jesus, give me a break here!

NARRATOR: Very sorry to hear that Orihime.

(Camera zooms in closer on Orihime's face as she delivers a speech.)

ORIHIME: (determined) I've learned a lot of things from that, and I've also learned of what it means to be treated horribly. Since then, I've turned towards the path of feminism and it's helped me out a lot! I've decided to stand up for the rights of hardworking and respectable woman who've been mistreated or judged solely because of their appearances!

NARRATOR: Wow, that's very powerful Orihime.

ORIHIME: Also, I don't know if you noticed, (points to her chest) but my breasts are gone forever. I've had to suffer so much ridicule, hate, and worst of all, back problems because of these stupid things, so I saved up $5,000 and rid myself of them for good!

NARRATOR: Uhh, that's kind of a risky step though, isn't it Orihime?

ORIHIME: Maybe it is. But breasts are what I consider to be the worst part of any woman's body and I say they be removed before they cause problems. (stands up) There's also a motto I follow from now, and I recommend every flat-chested woman follows it as well. I say to all of you (raises her arm to the sky), flat chested pride!

(A multi colored banner that says Flat Chested Pride plasters on the screen)

WOMEN: Flat Chested Pride!

(Cuts to reveal Rukia has her arm in the air as well.)

ORIHIME: See, I got some supporters already.

RUKIA: I like this cause a lot!

ICHIGO: (groans) See what I have to deal with here?

NARRATOR: Don't worry Ichigo, it's all part of the job. But yeah, glad to have all three of you on the show and we can't wait to see you.

ICHIGO: Yeah sounds great.

RUKIA: Can't wait to meet everybody.

ORIHIME: Remember everybody, flat chested pride.

(Flat Chested Pride Banner appears)

NARRATOR: She's going to be a handful, isn't she?

 _Blue Exorcist_

NARRATOR: Today we have twin brothers, exorcists, and Satan's offspring Rin and Yukio Okumura. Blue Exorcist is a popular manga and anime series that ran for twenty-six episodes and spawned a movie. There has been recent talk of a second anime adaptation, but we have yet to see it happen, so until then Rin and Yukio decided to join in with the show. So how are you guys today?

YUKIO: Oh, we're doing great.

(Rin has his head down on the table sleeping)

YUKIO: (tries shaking Rin a couple of times) Rin, Rin come on wake up, (smacks the table) RIN!

RIN: (suddenly snaps awake) SUKIYAKI! Oh, we're on. Sorry about that.

NARRATOR: It's alright Rin. But besides that, how do you guys feel with what has happened with your series.

RIN: It honestly felt way too quick. We just had it going and then it stopped.

YUKIO: Still they keep speaking about this new series coming out soon, so we won't rule out anything about that. Still we decided to participate in the hopes of getting some kind of action going.

NARRATOR: So, to ask about personal hobbies, what's been going on with Satan lately?

(Rin and Yukio look at each other and then back to the camera.)

RIN and YUKIO: We don't know.

NARRATOR: Well isn't he trying to hunt you both down?

RIN: No, he's way more pathetic than you think he is.

YUKIO: He stays in Gehenna, eating donuts and drinking beer all day. You could call him "Beezlebum".

RIN: Nice pun.

YUKIO: Thank you.

NARRATOR: So, do you guys still hunt demons?

RIN: Well we would, except there aren't a lot of them around anymore. Sometimes they just pop up at random. (Rin suddenly bursts into blue flames for no reason) Oh shit.

YUKIO: So do the blue flames.

RIN: (extinguishes the flames) Yeah sorry about that.

NARRATOR: Well what else do you guys do in your spare time?

YUKIO: Well I usually tend to do a lot of studying, being a book worm at all. And you know Rin still is a great cook so he always likes to...

(It's revealed that Rin is now smoking a joint.)

RIN: (high) Smoke weed everyday (takes a puff). Ahhhhhh…

YUKIO: (annoyed) Rin are you stupid? We're on TV you can't do that right now!

RIN: (high) Why not I'm gonna do it on the show anyway?

YUKIO: (more annoyed) That doesn't matter, we need to look respectable when we're on TV.

RIN: (laughs) Reality TV and respectable? Those things don't really go hand in hand, do they bro?

YUKIO: Just give me the goddamn joint! Give it to me! (tries to snatch it from him). COME ON GIVE IT!

RIN: HEY LET GO DAMMIT!

(Rin bursts in blue flames again as the two of them engage in a fight)

YUKIO: GIVE IT UP DEMON BOY!

RIN: DEMON BOY?! WHY YOU FOUR EYED MOLE FACE!

NARRATOR: Okay while these two fight it out, let's move on to the next candidates.

 _Gurren Lagann_

NARRATOR: Next up are main protagonist Simon, and the sexy sniper Yoko Littner from the anime series Gurren Lagann. A series that is still getting high praise as one of the best gundam shows of all time. It's become such a big success that it spawned two anime films Childhood's End and The Lights in the Sky are Stars as well as a manga series. So how are you guys today?

SIMON: Pretty good

YOKO: Alright

NARRATOR: So how do you guys feel now that your show has ended?

SIMON: I'm honestly not that bothered that it ended, because we all knew it was going to.

YOKO: Exactly people were expecting a second season but what they don't know is that Gurren Lagann had a planned ending. Everything in that series was supposed to end at it was, and sorry but there isn't a second season. And not to mention, did people really think the ending was that bad?

SIMON: I know right, was it really worth all the hate?

NARRATOR: I didn't think so, I liked it after all.

RANDOM GUY: I didn't

YOKO: (angrily) WHO SAID THAT?!

NARRATOR: One of the rude background guys. Do not talk badly about the ending you idiot!

RANDOM GUY: I think it was bullshit.

NARRATOR: Your life is bullshit asshole! Sorry about that guys. Anyway, do you all still keep in contact with the former members of the cast.

SIMON: Yeah, we still talk a lot.

NARRATOR: And I may regret asking this, but is Kamina…uhh…

(At the mention, Yoko starts crying. Simon hugs and comforts her)

SIMON: I wouldn't bring him up that much. She still isn't completely over it yet.

NARRATOR: Crap, I'm sorry! Cut the show for a second.

YOKO: (crying) He said he was gonna pay me back ten times over, but he never did. Fucking stupid bastard.

(Cuts. Comes back to show Yoko still sniffling and having running mascara on her face.)

NARRATOR: Are you feeling better Yoko?

YOKO: (sniffles) I'll be okay.

SIMON: I didn't know you wore mascara.

YOKO: There's a lot of things you don't know about me.

NARRATOR: Well, anyway we're happy to have you guys joining us on the show. Thanks for being with us today.

SIMON: You're welcome.

YOKO: (sniffles) Yeah, no problem.

NARRATOR: I really need to watch my mouth sometimes.

 _Chobits_

NARRATOR: Chobits has been listed as one of the most underrated animes and is notable for being a CLAMP show. CLAMP is an anime and manga studio run by all woman who are well known for creating other great and well known series such as xxxHolic and Tsubasa: Resevoir Chronicle. Today with us we have our guest, the adorable persocom Chi.

CHI: (waves politely to the camera) Hello everyone.

NARRATOR: So Chi, I have to ask how did you feel when Chobits ended?

CHI: It was kind of sad, I really love Chobits and it was a lot of fun to work on

NARRATOR: That's sad, but are there some aspects to your fame in Chobits that do get on your nerves sometimes? Like is there something that many fans will often ask you to do if they see you, or is there a common trope in the series that you really cannot stand?

CHI: Ummm, not really, I think the only time is when people stop me in the streets and ask me to do the line.

NARRATOR: You mean the ...?

CHI: (innocently) chiiii

NARRATOR: Oh that line. Alright then. So Chi, do you have any hobbies at all?

CHI: Well I really like computers, considering I am one. If there's anything I'd really like to do, it'd to be a computer programmer on the side.

NARRATOR: Actually, because you said you are one, do you mind if I test that out?

CHI: Sure.

NARRATOR: What is the definition of irony?

CHI: One moment please.

(Chi logs on to the internet. Her eyes show tons of numbers.)

CHI: (computer mode) _Irony_ : the expression of one's meaning by using language that normally signifies the opposite, typically for humorous or emphatic effect.

NARRATOR: Holy shit that's amazing. Okay two more question before we move on Chi.

CHI: Yes?

NARRATOR: Whatever happened to your former love interest Hideki Motosuwa? We hoped that we could contact him to be a part of this show but we couldn't find any information on his whereabouts. Do you know anything about where he is?

CHI: (uncomfortable) Oh he's ummmm...

(suddenly cuts to the outside of an abandoned building where several cop cars are gathered around. Sirens are blaring)

COP 1: COME OUT WITH YOUR HANDS UP MOTOSUWA! WE GOT YOU ON DRUG POSSESSION CHARGES, YOU'RE UNDER ARREST!

(Hideki appears in the window, he's dressed like a vagabond with shaggy clothes, beard, and all)

HIDEKI: FORGET IT POLICE, YOU'LL NEVER TAKE ME ALIVE!

COP 2: STORM THE BUILDING

(cuts back to Chi)

CHI: Somewhere around. (smiles)

NARRATOR: And what about those two other persocoms in the show, Sumomo and Kotoko? Where did they go?

CHI: Umm…I never really knew what happened to them. Last thing I remember they were apparently doing a cameo for some other series in the CLAMP family. Something…Chronicle if I'm right. I have to look up some more the CLAMP stuff again.

NARRATOR: Hmm, I may have to look into that. Well anyway, thanks for talking with us and it's great to have you here Chi.

CHI: Sure, and thank you as well.

NARRATOR: She is so adorable.

 _The Melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiya_

NARRATOR: Haruhi Suzumiya is a well-known manga and anime series that has spanwed many spinoff manga and series as well as a feature film _The Disappearance of Haruhi Suzumiya_ which has become the second-longest animated film ever made. Today with us we have the eccentric, hilarious, thrill seeking Haruhi Suzumiya herself. How are you today Haruhi?

HARUHI: (excited) Oh my gosh, this is so exciting, HELLO EVERYBODY!

NARRATOR: So Haruhi, how do you feel now that your series has ended.

HARUHI: Am I supposed to feel bad? No way. ALWAYS BE HAPPY!

NARRATOR: Okay that's a lot of enthusiasm. Do you wish to have any plans while your here on the show?

HARUHI: START UP A NEW SOS BRIGADE! To anyone watching right now, if you're a time traveler, esper, shapeshifter, space alien, or anything weird or occult. We invite you all to join us.

NARRATOR: Hmm, that's a pretty good idea. But Haruhi, what happened to all the other former members of the SOS Brigade? You know Kyon, Yuki, Mikuru, and Itsuki, have you seen them at all lately.

HARHUI (wondering): Mmmmm, I haven't seen a lot of Kyon lately, but I think he's somewhere around.

(Cuts to Kyon runs into the same building that Hideki is hiding in)

KYON (panicked): Hey do you mind if I hide out here, the cops are after me for robbing a 7-Eleven.

HIDEKI: Sure no problem.

(The two sit down for a minute)

KYON: Do you think we sound alike?

HIDEKI: Eh, I don't really hear it.

KYON: Eh, probably just my imagination.

(Cuts back to Haruhi)

HARUHI: I occasionally run into Mikuru and Yuki sometimes, but they're busy with their own things.

(Yuki and Mikuru are sitting at a bus stop. Both looking bored)

YUKI: (bored) Wanna get high?

MIKURU: (bored) Yes.

HARUHI: And as for Itsuki, I've heard he's been in the news lately. Doing some kind of modeling, I think.

(cuts to Itsuki getting photographs taken and on the cover of pornographic magazines)

NARRATOR: That's all fine and dandy I guess, thanks for talking with us Haruhi.

HARUHI: You're welcome, peace out

(Haruhi waves to the camera before getting up and walking away)

NARRATOR: Well she seems nice for the most part.

HARUHI: (offscreen) Hey, your ears look big, are you a space alien!?

BACKGROUND: What!? No! Shut up you little brat!

NARRATOR: She's gonna need to be watched over.

 _Fullmetal Alchemist_

NARRATOR: Fullmetal Alchemist is a popular manga that has been adapted into two anime series, the original Fullmetal Alchemist and Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood which was much closer to the original manga. Here with us today we have the main character of the series. Edward Elric.

EDWARD: (casually) Hey what's up.

NARRATOR: So Ed, how do you feel with your show being cancelled.

EDWARD: What's there to be upset about? I don't feel bad.

NARRATOR: Really, no regrets.

EDWARD: No, why should I? It ended where it was supposed to didn't it?

NARRATOR: Yeah, I guess it did.

EDWARD: The only thing I was a little peeved about was that we thought Conqueror of Shamballa was going to lead into a second season of the original Fullmetal Alchemist anime, but it never did. But I think Brotherhood made up for that and got it more on par with the manga, so that's worth it.

NARRATOR: I guess it did.

EDWARD: I've moved on from all that. And since I have nothing better to do, I heard this show was looking for people from finished anime series, so I figured I'd come here and do this.

NARRATOR: Well that's nice. So, what happened to Winry your love interest and your brother Alphonse?

EDWARD: Well for one Winry and I weren't really love interests. I mean she's a good friend and all but that's it. She went on to become a professional mechanic for Nissan, she's made the coolest automobiles I've ever seen. She was involved in the creation of the Rogue and the Pathfinder.

NARRATOR: And your brother, Alphonse?

EDWARD: You ever seen those really sad Sarah MacLachlan cat commercials?

NARRATOR: Uh-huh.

EDWARD: Well Al's working in those commercials now. He's gotten more than a million views on TV. Wanna see? (holds up a laptop)

(The laptop plays a YouTube video. The video shows Alphonse with a cat in his lap. Sad music is playing.)

ALPHONSE: Hi, I'm Alphonse Elric. Despite the fact I don't have a body anymore, I still have a soul. A soul that cares for the lives of these poor little kittens. Will you have a care and try to save the lives of these poor unfortunate little angels. For just a couple dollars you can give them a home with food, water, and love. Be a good person and donate today.

(Commercial ends. All the crew are heard crying and sobbing in the background at the sad commercial.)

NARRATOR: Wow, I never knew those commercials could have such an impact. Especially on these idiots (groans at the crew crying). Well moving on from that, do you have any plans Edward? Are there any things you really want to do on this show.

EDWARD: I guess just try and live day by day. And seeing all the other awesome characters I get to live with, I'm definitely looking forward to it.

NARRATOR: Sounds good.

BACKGROUND GUY: (quietly) Shorty.

NARRATOR: Fred, don't insult the guests! I'm sorry Ed.

EDWARD: It's no big deal. That was all just a joke in the series. I'll be going now.

(Edward walks away from the set.)

EDWARD: (offscreen) AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!

(smashing sound effects are heard)

EDWARD: (enraged) WHY DO THEY KEEP DOING THAT JOKE, IT'S SO FUCKING OLD!

NARRATOR: Hey Ed, it's no big deal.

Edward: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

NARRATOR: I think we better move on.

 _Code Geass_

NARRATOR: Code Geass is another popular anime series that debuted around 2007. Since then, it has spawned several manga series and a lot of merchandise. So let's get to our next guest here on the show. The exiled prince and leader of the Black Nights, the one and only...LELOUCH VI BRITANNIA!

(fake applause is heard)

LELOUCH: (sexily) Greetings everyone. I, Lelouch vi Britannia, command you all, to dance...

(Camera cuts to all the background crew dancing)

NARRATOR: Very smooth Lelouch, I gotta say.

LELOUCH: (sexily) Why thank you, weird narrator guy.

NARRATOR: So how have you felt since your series ended? It was a really shocking end, especially in your case considering you well...died.

LELOUCH: (smirking) You just spoiled it for everyone didn't you.

NARRATOR: Oopsie daisy

LELOUCH: To be honest, I'm honestly fine with the series ending. We got out all we needed right? I overthrow Britannia, become the ruler of the entire world, and then get killed by my best friend, which was planned from the start just to point out.

NARRATOR: Did you enjoy doing the series?

LELOUCH: Definitely, best experience of my life.

NARRATOR: So what do you want to do now that you're here on the show with us.

LELOUCH: Well I guess I'll hang out with everyone, relax, control their minds with my Geass powers. And ultimately, TAKE OVER THE WORLD!

NARRATOR: Sounds like a good time, thanks for joining us Lelouch. Oh by the way there's a fly on your hand.

LELOUCH: Hmm?

(Lelouch looks down at his hand. His face suddenly gets fearful)

LELOUCH: (terrified) AAAAHHHH! NO, NO, NO, GET IT OFF ME, GET IT OFF ME!

(Lelouch jumps up from his chair trying to swat it while jumping around in panic. He suddenly realizes he broke his sly and cool demeanor and immediately returns to it.)

LELOUCH: Thank you very much narrator guy.

CREW MEMBER: There's another one flying by your head.

LELOUCH: (eyes go wide) AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH! GROSS! EWWWW! GET IT AWAY FROM ME! GET IT AWAY!

(Lelouch gets up from his seat and runs away from the seat screaming)

NARRATOR: Huh, well I guess looks are very deceiving. Let's move on.

 _Eureka Seven_

NARRATOR: Eureka Seven is considered to be one of the most underrated animes of all time. It aired between 2005 -2006 and spawned a manga series, a film Pocketful of Rainbows which took place in an alternate dimension which received mixed reviews, and a spinoff show Eureka Seven AO which unfortunately received scathing reviews from critics and fans of the original show. Despite this, the series still has a loyal fanbase and today we have the two main characters here, both mech pilots, the human Renton Thurston and the Humanoid Coralian Eureka...what's her last name?

CREW MEMBER: (heard from the back) It's never been told in the series, but it was said to be Zita in the movie Pocketful of Rainbows. Let's just keep it open ended.

NARRATOR: Okay fair enough.

(Eureka and Renton wave at the camera.)

RENTON: Hey everyone.

EUREKA: Hi everybody.

NARRATOR: So Renton, Eureka, how are you guys today?

RENTON: We're doing well thank you.

EUREKA: Yes, very well.

NARRATOR: So let's get to the big question. Have times been hard since your show ended?

RENTON: Oh yeah, it's definitely been hard. We love that show so much.

EUREKA: Yes, it was a very sad experience. Going through fifty episodes of that show, becoming friends with our fellow characters, and just having a great time being there. It's definitely sad when you finish it all.

NARRATOR: Do you guys still talk to a lot of the old cast?

RENTON: Well most of the Gekko of course. Holland is my home-boy, always has been.

NARRATOR: Didn't he beat the crap out of you for like twelve episodes.

RENTON: That was all in the show, we actually had fun doing those scenes.

EUREKA: (laughing) Yeah, I remember during that one fight, I think in episode 18, he hit you way too hard and right after the director called cut, Holland was freaking out apologizing to you.

RENTON: (laughing) Yeah. And then the next day he bought me a box of blueberry donuts to make it up to me.

EUREKA: (laughing) That was so cute. But yeah, I also keep in touch with Talho over the phone and I still see her from time to time. I had lunch with her last week as a matter of fact.

NARRATOR: Now let me ask the other big question because so many people have wanted to know this. What is your opinion on the movie Pocketful of Rainbows and Eureka Seven: AO? People have given both negative feedback and we figure we have to hear from the characters perspectives.

RENTON: Okay the movie Pocketful of Rainbows, or Good Night, Sleep Tight, Young Lovers if you like that title better, I don't think was that bad. We had fun making it, and I liked some of the alternate concepts they got to make with it.

EUREKA: Do you know why they had that title too?

RENTON: No, I don't even knew why our episodes were named after songs.

EUREKA: Well, as for AO, we had no involvement in it and we haven't seen it yet. But I don't think it'll be as bad as everybody keeps saying.

RENTON: Yeah, I'm definitely very open minded and if I do get the chance to watch it, I'll give it a constructive review because I don't want to go bashing it when there could be some good points.

NARRATOR: That's very nice Renton. So, what do you guys wish to do on this series. Any plans?

RENTON: I guess just take everything as it goes.

EUREKA: Yeah, and I'm especially excited to meet all the new people in this place.

NARRATOR: Okay, final question before we move on. You were a couple with a greatly established romance. In fact, you two have been listed as one of the best couples in any anime. Is it true that you are both a couple?

RENTON: No, we're not at couple.

EUREKA: No, not at all. We're just best friends.

BACKGROUND GUY: Liar.

NARRATOR: Tom, stop interrupting the show!

EUREKA: (irritated) Hey, I'm not lying! We're not a couple okay!

BACKGROUND GUY: So why did you spend fifty episodes of a series establishing a romance?

RENTON: (irritated) It's a fictional series! Everything was scripted!

BACKGROUND GUY: Okay sure, I'm not supposed to believe that, but I can believe that there exists a weird blue haired alien chick that was born from some slime stuff and can talk to machines.

(Eureka is noticeably angry at this point. She turns to the camera.)

EUREKA: (fake smile) Is it fine if I talk to that man for a moment?

NARRATOR: Be our guest.

EUREKA: Thank you.

(Eureka walks off the set for a second and goes backstage. Renton just sits there nonchalantly. What is heard next is all offscreen.)

BACKGROUND GUY: Oh I'm so worried, I'm getting a pep talk from the...Wait what are you doing with that pole...Oh no, you're not...

EUREKA: (enraged) COME HERE YOU FUCKING LITTLE DICK CHEESE!

BACKGROUND GUY: OH SHIT!

(sounds of the background guy being beaten are heard as well as screaming from the background)

BACKGROUND GUY: NO STOP PLEASE! I DIDN'T MEAN IT, I WAS KIDDING! MY ARM DOESN'T BEND THAT WAY!

EUREKA: (screaming in rage) YEAH DOESN'T FEEL SO GOOD NOW DOES IT ASSHOLE! HOW DOES THIS FEEL?! YOU THINK IT'S FUNNY MAKING FUN OF MY RACE!? HUH, DO YOU!?

BACKGROUND GUY: I'M SORRY! I'M SORRY!

EUREKA: DON'T CRY, DON'T CRY, I WANNA BE YOUR FRIEND!

RENTON: Yeah, I should've probably mentioned, Eureka's not one to take being insulted lightly. Especially not about her heritage.

NARRATOR: Well, what that guy said was very rude, so I can excuse it.

RENTON: (whispers) Also, I should mention the biggest point, don't mispronounce her name. She's very sensitive about that.

NARRATOR: Oh boy. I'll remember.

BACKGROUND: PLEASE DON'T KILL ME!

EUREKA: NOW CLEAN UP YOUR OWN BLOOD BITCH!

BACKGROUND GUY: (whimpering) Okay

(Eureka walks back onto the set and sits back down)

EUREKA: (panting) Sorry about that, I get a little heated sometimes.

NARRATOR: Yeah, we can tell. Let's move on. (In his thoughts) Oh I pity the guy that tries to pressure her into prom sex.

 _Neon Genesis Evangelion_

NARRATOR: Neon Genesis Evangelion is considered to be one of the best anime series of all time. Since its debut in 1996, it's gained rave reviews from both critics and anime fans alike and spawned a gigantic franchise with several manga series, and a series of films with a new film series called Rebuild of Evangelion being released right now. The series has also garnered criticism from certain fans on aspects in the story telling considered confusing. I can't lie, I don't get some of it either, but I like the show. So today, we've got the star of the show joining us. Please welcome Shinji Ikari.

(Nobody is at the desk on the set.)

NARRATOR: Umm, Shinji? Shinji? Where are you Shinji? Hey can one of you guys go get Shinji? I think he's still in the dressing room.

BACKGROUND GUY: Hold on, I'll go grab him.

(Background noises are heard getting louder and louder. Shinji is dragged into the room by the background guy screaming and flailing his arms.)

SHINJI: I WON'T DO IT! I WON'T BECAME A MEDIA WHORE FOR REALITY TV, I'M NOT THAT DESPERATE!

BACKGROUND GUY: Come on, you're gonna do this whether you like it or not.

SHINJI: DON'T MAKE ME! DON'T MAKE ME INTO A WHORE!

(Camera cuts to Shinji sitting there at the seat with a forced smile on his face)

NARRATOR: Welcome to the show Shinji, it's very nice to have you here.

SHINJI: (struggling to say) Really happy to be here. (In his head) I mustn't run away, I mustn't run away, I mustn't run away.

NARRATOR: So Shinji, we know that Evangelion is still growing strong right now, but I have to ask, have things been difficult since your original series has ended.

SHINJI: (regains composure) At times it can be, but overall it still has a fanbase and it's still held in high regard so I can't complain. (In his head) Which is also why I can't believe I have to do this fucking shit!

NARRATOR: So what has happened to all the other people from the series? You know Misato, Rei, Asuka, your friends Toji and Kensuke, and your father Gendo. Where are they?

SHINJI: Pfft, hell if I know. They probably all died in The End of Evangelion. You know, that film where I was launched into utter insanity, and nobody knew what the fuck was going on?

NARRATOR: But how is that possible? I mean, wasn't the whole show supposed to be fictional?

SHINJI: Well..yeah but you see. We took some different ways to try and make it more believable to the audience, but let's just say that it didn't go completely as planned, and well I'm the only one still standing.

NARRATOR: Umm, I don't really understand. I mean if they all died, then how are they reprising their roles in the Rebuild of Evangelion series?

SHINJI: Lookalikes

NARRATOR: Okay I can deal with that. Well either way, I still admire your show a ton. I've always come to see Evangelion as one of those mecha series that tries to break the rules of being the traditional mecha show, especially with a main protagonist that isn't completely a hero, and show how he would really react if thrown into a situation. I've heard a lot of people don't like what you did in those scenes, but it was

SHINJI: (in his head) Kind of like how I'm reacting now being thrown into this motherfucking scam!

NARRATOR: I have to say though, I don't really understand a lot of the religious symbolism, and especially the endings. I mean, at least with End of Evangelion, when you and Asuka ended up in that oblivion following the Third Impact, I can at least see that as a solid conclusion. With the original series though, I really don't get it. You just ended up on a giant blue ball with all your friends after you finally came to understand that you don't need to be depressed or angry. I mean, what kind of ending is that?

SHINJI: Let's just say that our budget was really tight at the time. We really didn't know that the show was going to get as good as it did, so we had to go with that ending. (in his head) And saying that I don't need to be angry anymore is totally inaccurate!

NARRATOR: Understandable. Anyway Shinji, do you have any plans now that you're here with us today.

SHINJI: (In his head) You mean besides keeping my sanity while trying to deal with the fact that I'm a media whore now? (Out loud) Not really anything, just try to do my best I guess. Meet everyone here and just try to live a little. I saw I got some other gundam people here with those guys from Gurren Lagann and Eureka Seven, guess they'd be a fun pair to hang out with.

NARRATOR: Sounds good to me. Thanks for being here with us Shinji.

SHINJI: No problem

(Shinji gets up from his seat.)

SHINJI: (mutters under his breath) Oh my God, I feel so fucking dirty. I know I needed money, but why'd it have to be reality TV!? Why!?

NARRATOR: I think we may need to keep an eye on him. Make sure that he doesn't hurt himself.

That's all the members who will be joining us in the house for this show. Let's see how they make out as they try to live together. This is Animes Unite and I'm your unseen narrator.

 **This is gonna be a crazy time.**

 **I know I haven't been active on the site for a long time and that's because I've had many commitments. I'm in college currently studying TV/Film and it is a full time job. I've learned a ton more about film and am considering a potential career in it. I've also found an interest in voice acting and have been working to better myself at that with acting classes and frequent vocal and singing practice. I'm sorry that I haven't been posting a lot lately but I assure you all that I am not dead, and nor have I given up on writing. In fact, I've actually been doing it a lot more now, both with fanfictions and with original works.**

 **So how did this entire story come about? That's very interesting to ask.**

 **As a lot of you may know, I am an anime fan. I grew up watching shows like Robotech, Pokemon, Digimon, Yu-Gi-Oh, Sailor Moon and the Studio Ghibli films but I became an official anime fan during my sophomore year of high school. Around the mid part of my senior year, after watching tons of series, the idea suddenly popped into my head for a crossover story. Many crossovers have been done before no doubt, but something came to my mind of a potential crossover that got together various series, each of different style and origin and had them living together. I also thought of having it be a more adult comedy series inspired by the likes of shows like Venture Bros, South Park, and Futurama. And so this series was born.**

 **This was a beast to write I will not deny. I spent hours at my computer screen trying to come up with the right idea and at times writers block got me. Other times I would return to watch each show to gain a better idea or a good joke and would confide in friends to find out some good plotlines and ideas, which to those guys, thank you very much. When I finally finished it, I thought to myself "how crazy was I to write this, I must be totally insane." I could've scrapped this entire thing, but I kept going and now here I am.  
**

 **I decided to finally post it after recently finishing the entire draft at the advice of my TV/Film Practicum Advisor who has given me great advice as a writer. I also have tons of future plans for this, so keep an eye out and I'll explain as we go along.**

 **Also I should note that I am aware Blue Exorcist Kyoto Saga was just released as well as Eureka Seven Hi-Evolution this September, though I started writing this before the announcements were made, so there isn't any message of them in these stories, though I may make some later on ;)  
**

 **It has been a hard road to keep writing until I get to my finished goal and I'm glad that I was able to pull it off with this particular story. I want to say thank you to all the people who have given me tons of support including my good friends here at school, and the many readers and followers here on Fanfiction. You guys are great. If anyone has any kind of suggestions on what I could do to make the story better or any kind of constructive criticism, go ahead and say it as I'm looking for anything I could do to make the story better.  
**

 **I own none of the above characters in the aforementioned series. Each belongs to their respective owners:**

 **Bleach is owned by Viz Media, Tite Kubo and Toei Animation  
**

 **Blue Exorcist is owned by Aniplex of America, A-1 Pictures, Kazue Kato and Tensai Okamura  
**

 **Tenga Toppa Gurren Lagann is owned by Aniplex of America, Gainax, Kazuki Nakashima, and Hiroyuki Imaishi  
**

 **Fullmetal Alchemist is owned by Aniplex of America, Funimation Entertainment, Studio Bones and Hiromu Arakawa  
**

 **Code Geass is owned by Funimation Entertainment, Sunrise,** **Ichirō Ōkouchi,** ** **Gor** **ō Taniguchi, and CLAMP  
****

 **The Melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiya is owned by Funimation Entertainment, Kyoto Animation, and Nagaru Tanigawa**

 **Chobits is owned by Funimation Entertainment, Madhouse Studios and CLAMP.**

 **Eureka Seven is owned by Funimation Entertainment, Studio Bones, and Dai Sato.**

 **Neon Genesis Evangelion is owned by AEsir Holdings, Gainax and Hideaki Anno  
**


	2. Episode 1: A New House

**Hello everyone! Welcome to the first episode of Animes Unite. In this episode, the characters move in to the house and get adjusted to living with each other. Though, certain things are easier said than done, especially with opposite personalities.  
**

 **Warning: Adult language, violence, and adult situations.**

 **Episode 1: A New House**

NARRATOR: Welcome to the first episode of Animes Unite. Last time we had our introduction where we met all of our major characters for this show. The characters presented included Rukia Kuchiki, Ichigo Kurosaki and Orihime Inoue from Bleach. Simon and Yoko Littner from Gurren Lagann. Rin and Yukio Okumura from Blue Exorcist. Lelouch vi Britannia from Code Geass. Haruhi Suzumiya from The Melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiya. Edward Elric from the Fullmetal Alchemist series. Chi from Chobits. Renton Thurston and Eureka from Eureka Seven. And finally, Shinji Ikari from Neon Genesis Evangelion. We're happy to have all of these characters here. So how this show works is they'll be living in this house here.

(A large three story house with a gated fence is shown)

NARRATOR: We specifically picked this house to accommodate all the members living here. Outside you can see we have a beautiful exterior for this three-story house.

(Camera pans to the other side of the house)

NARRATOR: On the other side you can see a nice porch outside with some tables and seats. But the best part here is the swimming pool. 9 feet deep and always well kept, it's very fun to go and take a swim.

BACKGROUND GUY: Think they'll use it?

NARRATOR: They probably will eventually. But now that we've covered the outside of the house, let's take a look inside shall we?

(Interior of the house is shown)

NARRATOR: We've got an amazing living room with a flat screen TV, several couches, and for entertainment a gaming system (insert what system you like here). In the kitchen area, we've got a several counters for cooking, an expensive microwave oven and fridge. Right next door to that is a dining room with a giant table for everyone to eat at, looks really nice doesn't it? Let's move upstairs.

(Cuts to the upstairs of the house)

NARRATOR: Upstairs we've got three different bathrooms and showers.

(Moves to the hallway with the four bedrooms)

NARRATOR: And finally there's the bedrooms, four to be exact. Now we've specifically chosen bedrooms for each member based on who we believe will get along better and we'll announce it when they get here. Considering what we've seen in the introduction, I believe that most of them will get along just fine...hopefully.

(The sound of a horn honking is heard outside)

NARRATOR: Oh, and here they are now.

(Camera goes outside where we see all fourteen of the house members being dropped off in a bus. They all get out one by one, carrying suitcases, bags, and backpacks)

NARRATOR: Welcome everyone, to your new home.

ICHIGO: Wow, really big house

RUKIA: Yeah, it's really pretty

ORIHIME: (apathetically) Eh, I guess it'll do

RIN: Gotta admit, it's way better than that apartment we were living in before.

YUKIO: Rin we didn't have an apartment, we were living on the streets.

RIN: Oh yeah, how are we still alive.

YUKIO: Two words. Viz…Media.

YOKO: Very nice house, maybe this wasn't such a bad idea after all.

SIMON: I don't know maybe. (whispers to her) I'm still keeping my eyes open Yoko. No telling what these crazy people are planning for us.

YOKO: As long as it doesn't involve anything carnal, I'm in.

SIMON: What's carnal mean?

YOKO: You don't want to know.

CHI: (in her head) I wonder, a house this big probably has a large Wi-fi network right? I can probably work with as many computers as I want to here. (excited) This is gonna be so great!

HARUHI: (in her head) This is it, my chance to have even more fun. (Looks at the other girls) And I see I may have some mascots on board. (giggles mischievously)

EDWARD: (in his head) Well this looks even better than Shou Tucker's house. Maybe I can make my own chem lab in the basement. (gasp) Maybe it has a library where I can do more alchemy research! This'll be awesome!

LELOUCH: (in his head) Remember to keep sly and cool Lelouch. This is your chance to prove that you're a smooth, sexy, and awesome exiled prince. Get ready ladies here I co-

(A fly goes right by him, and his eyes go wide)

LELOUCH: (terrified) AAAAAAAAAH! NO, NO, NO, GET IT OFF ME! DON'T TOUCH ME! DON'T TOUCH ME!

(Lelouch jumps around in panic while he pulls out bug spray, camera pans to Renton and Eureka staring at him.)

RENTON: (sarcastic tone) Well I guess he's going to do just fine. (Turns to Eureka) You looking forward to it?

EUREKA: I won't deny it; the house looks very festive, but I have one simple warning to everyone here.

RENTON: I think I know what that is.

EUREKA: Don't fuck with me and we'll be fine. Try to fuck with me, and your medical bills will be through the roof.

RENTON: (happy) Except me of course, because I'm special.

(Eureka turns to Renton with a grin on her face.)

EUREKA: (playful) Oh I don't think so Renton.

RENTON: (nervous) What?

EUREKA: Just because you're my friend doesn't mean I'm giving special exceptions.

(Eureka pulls Renton to her face by his collar)

EUREKA: (threateningly) If you piss me off, you'll be singing Hatsune Miku with your jaw wired.

RENTON: Did I ever tell you that you're a very vicious girl?

EUREKA: I figured you'd learn that after I dealt with Gidget when we were working on the show.

RENTON: All she did was spill coffee on your fucking shirt! You put her in the hospital for a week!

EUREKA: Yeah, well that coffee was too fucking hot dipshit!

SHINJI: (in his head) OH MY GOD, WHAT AM I DOING?! I'M SUCH A DISGRACE! I'M A JOKE, A LAUGHINGSTOCK, A MEDIA WHORE!

NARRATOR: Well looks like everyone's gathered here. How is everyone today?

EVERYONE: Fine.

NARRATOR: Good, now are you all ready to move into the house?

EVERYONE: Yeah.

NARRATOR: Alright then. Everyone go inside and get settled in.

(Everyone goes inside)

EDWARD: Damn, this place looks even better inside than on the outside. (takes a look around)

NARRATOR: Of course, we want you all to have a comfortable experience living here. That's why we took it upon ourselves to give you guys the best living accommodations ever.

SHINJI: Hmph, I bet this is all some kind of set up.

SIMON: Shut up Shinji.

(Yoko runs into the room with a bright smile.)

YOKO: (excitedly) Hey! Did you guys see that we have a swimming pool outside?

NARRATOR: Like I said, we want you all to feel comfortable here.

(Edward walks in, looking bummed)

EDWARD: (disappointed) They don't have a library in here. I was hoping to do more alchemy research.

NARRATOR: Sorry Ed, but this house isn't big enough to have a library. How about we move upstairs and show you the bedrooms?

ICHIGO: Sounds great.

(They all walk upstairs)

NARRATOR: So, we arranged the rooms based on how we thought each of you would get along. Here's how it's sorted. In Room 1, we have Ichigo, Renton, Simon and Edward.

ICHIGO: (smiling) Okay, this sounds like a good setup. And I get to room with the Fullmetal Alchemist himself.

EDWARD: Yeah, and I get to room with a guy who can talk to dead people, and it's more badass than The Sixth Sense.

ICHIGO: Take that M. Night Shyamalan.

RENTON: Nice to room with another mech pilot.

SIMON: (pats Renton on the back) Likewise.

NARRATOR: Moving on. In Room 2 we have Lelouch, Shinji, Rin, and Yukio.

RIN: Oh fuck me. We have to room with Shinji Ikari, the biggest crybaby in the anime world.

YUKIO: The other one was supposed to be the exiled prince with the ability to control minds, but he doesn't seem all too brave either. What a bunch of lies.

RIN: Looks are very deceiving huh?

NARRATOR: That's what I said.

YUKIO: At least we get to room together. But one warning Rin, please do not touch my stash of porn. I just bought it off the web and it's very precious to me.

RIN: Alright, I'll keep that in mind (has his fingers crossed).

NARRATOR: So, that's all for the men in the house. Now for the women. In Room 3, we have Eureka, Yoko, and Chi.

EUREKA: (relieved) Oh thank God.

YOKO: What's wrong, you were worried about rooming?

EUREKA: I was hoping that I didn't get roomed with…

(Eureka looks at Haruhi who smiles and waves)

EUREKA: (disgust) …her.

YOKO: Oh, now I see.

CHI: I say we keep our chins up. I think everything will be fun, now that we're roommates (smiles innocently)

(Eureka and Yoko smile at Chi's cuteness)

YOKO: (giggling) She's way too cute.

(Eureka looks at Haruhi and then at Chi)

EUREKA: I just realized something. Something to do with Chi.

YOKO: What is it?

EUREKA: Hear me out, I got a little plan

(Eureka whispers into Yoko's ear)

NARRATOR: Ok, while they talk in secret, Room 4 is given to Orihime, Haruhi and Rukia.

HARUHI: (excitedly) YES! I get the most popular female characters from one of the most popular animes of all time.

(Haruhi runs up behind Orihime and Rukia and hugs the both of them)

HARUHI: We're gonna be the best friends ever!

(She runs into the bedroom. Rukia gets uncomfortable at Haruhi's antics and moves closer to Orihime.)

RUKIA: Orihime, I don't think I can handle living with her.

(Orihime gives Rukia a hug)

ORIHIME: It's alright babe, everything's gonna be fine.

(Orihime turns to Eureka, Chi, and Yoko)

ORIHIME: Do you mind if we hang out with you guys during the day to avoid Haruhi?

EUREKA and YOKO: Be our guests.

ORIHIME: Flat sisters stay together. Right girls? Flat chested pride.

(Flat chested pride banner appears again.)

WOMEN and EUREKA, YOKO, and RUKIA: Flat chested pride!

(Cuts back to all of them holding their arms up in the air. Eureka, Orihime and Rukia all glare at Yoko who looks down at her chest and then at the floor in shame.)

ORIHIME: (quietly) You are part of the problem.

EUREKA: By the way, hear us out on our plan, I think we can work together. (starts whispering with Yoko, Rukia and Orihime)

NARRATOR: Well now that we got the entire crew together, we're gonna take a quick commercial break and when we come back, we'll see how everybody has adjusted to one day in the house. I'm your unseen narrator and this is Animes Unite. We'll be right back after these messages.

…

NARRATOR: Welcome back to Animes Unite. I'm your unseen narrator and when we last left our guests they were getting settled in. It's the next day already so let's see how everyone's adjusted. We're gonna go by each room and ask each occupant what it's been like. Let's start with the group of guys and see what they've been up to.

(Camera cuts to Ichigo at the desk followed by Simon, Renton, and Edward as they give their opinions. Footage is also intercut of them hanging out together)

ICHIGO: Moving in the first day seemed kind of hard, but I feel it turned out better than expected.

SIMON: Me, Renton, Edward and Ichigo get along great. We're kind of like a dream team of friends. We're always together, having a great time.

RENTON: It's been good living with them. We play games, joke around, do lots of stuff. It's been cool.

EDWARD: I'm glad to have made good friends with Ichigo, Renton, and Simon. They're really great guys. They even helped me out with getting a possible alchemy lab set up.

NARRATOR: Hmm, very cool.

EDWARD: We still need the finances to get it ready though, but I'm not gonna ask them to spare cash on me.

NARRATOR: That sounds wise, don't want to start making enemies.

(Camera then cuts to Rin and Yukio, Shinji, and Lelouch each at the desk)

RIN: So far, living with Shinji and Lelouch, has some very annoying stuff about it, and I mean really fucking annoying. It's driving both Yukio and I crazy.

YUKIO: Shinji's always complaining that he's a reality TV whore and Lelouch freaks out over every little thing; bugs, horror movies, jumpscares, pranks, everything imaginable.

SHINJI: Lelouch constantly screams whenever something frightens him, Yukio doesn't do anything except sit around and read some weird manga collection he has, and Rin lays around smoking weed, and eating.

LELOUCH: Of course, Rin's a lazy stoner who lays on his ass and eats all day, Yukio just sits around all day reading manga, which I'm honestly suspicious about because he warned us not to touch it, and Shinji's complaining every damn minute.

(Background guy jumps out wearing a mask)

BACKGROUND GUY: BOO!

LELOUCH: (screaming in high pitched voice) AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH! MOOOOOOOOMYYYYYYYYYYY!

(Lelouch runs away from the table)

NARRATOR: (annoyed) Really Joe?

BACKGROUND GUY: I'm sorry, he's so easy to mess with.

(Cuts to Eureka, Yoko and Chi at the interview desk. Footage is inter cut of them having fun as they talk.)

EUREKA: Yoko and Chi are really cool to be around. Yoko's someone I can rely on when I'm upset and Chi can make your day with how cute she is. We get along really well and I couldn't ask for anything more. Although, I can smell a lot of gunpowder in the room from when Yoko comes back after practicing with her rifles.

YOKO: I like Eureka a lot, though I'll be honest when I say she is short tempered and can get volatile at times. Fortunately, it hasn't been directed at me. And do I have to say Chi is just way too cute, and not to mention has the greatest computer knowledge I've ever seen. Ask her one thing and she can find it all on the Internet.

CHI: Eureka and Yoko are really kind people to room with. Eureka can get really angry sometimes, and Yoko's sniper practicing leaves a very weird smell in the room, but I get the feeling that they really care about me a lot as they always ask to help me with things. I can understand why though, I am a computer after all.

(Cuts to Orihime, Rukia, and Haruhi.)

ORIHIME: Rukia and I cannot live with someone like Haruhi. She goes beyond being loud or annoying which wouldn't be all that bad. She is impulsive, egotistical and unpredictable. I'm very protective of Rukia, and a lot of the times Haruhi tries to pull her antics on her. Every day she just starts jumping around and causing a ruckus, annoying us and everybody. The only time we're ever able to get peace is when we go to bed, and then in the morning it starts all up again.

RUKIA: Haruhi is not someone that I want to room with. Her behavior is just unacceptable. For the most part Orihime and I are barely ever in our room. We're mostly hanging out in Eureka, Chi, and Yoko's room to avoid her as much as we can. She's just horrible.

HARUHI: (disappointed) Orihime and Rukia are almost never around and I find that really sad. I really think that we could be good friends if they give me a chance. They're great characters from an amazing series and I want to really establish a good relationship with them, and maybe make them new members of the SOS Brigade.

NARRATOR: So, as we can see, there is some tension that has arisen between certain house members. At the same time, there are established relationships between members in the household and good ones at best. So now the second order of business is to relieve that tension. Let's see how that plays out.

(Camera cuts to Yukio at the table)

YUKIO: The producers called us to get together to have a sit-down. They basically want us to work out these certain problems that we're having.

SIMON: I really think there has been some tension arising between members and I think a sit-down may be the best option to work through everything perfectly.

(Cuts to everyone in the living room sitting on either the chairs or the floor. Ichigo is leading the conversation.)

ICHIGO: Okay everybody. So, we're here today to resolve certain issues that have arisen between all of us. So, I say to start, let's look over our flaws. From that, we can identify the main issue at hand and hopefully manage to resolve the problems. Anybody want to go first?

RENTON: How about we let the ladies go first.

ICHIGO: Okay, sounds good. Let's start with the members in Room 3. Eureka, Yoko and Chi. How have you guys felt living with each other so far?

CHI: It's been really good.

EUREKA: So far nothing bad has happened. We get along just great.

YOKO: Mm-hmm.

ICHIGO: Now can you all acknowledge each other's flaws?

YOKO: Oh yeah definitely. Of course, my flaws are that I can sometimes get very upset when I think about… (looks like she's about to cry but stifles it) …a certain person that I was very close to. I'm sorry, I nearly broke down there.

EUREKA: (pats Yoko on the back) It's alright, it's gonna be fine. Well, with me I fly into rages sometimes, mostly when provoked or if I'm in a bad mood. I did lose my temper a couple times with some of the other members after we got here.

(Brief montage of Eureka losing it several times though her tantrums aren't nearly as violent as when she attacked the background guy in the introduction.)

EUREKA: And...I think it may happen again. But so far that hasn't happened between Yoko and Chi. I give Chi a lot of credit for that, she always manages to brighten up my day.

CHI: Aww that's very sweet. Thank you.

ICHIGO: And Chi, do you have any flaws?

CHI: I think being too cute is my problem. It sometimes keeps people from talking to me normally and at times they just ogle over me. Although Yoko and Eureka try to treat me normally and don't ogle over me all the time.

EUREKA: That's because we care.

(All three smile together)

ICHIGO: Okay, now let's move on to the girls in Room 4. Orihime, Rukia and Haruhi.

ORIHIME: As said before in our previous interview. We-

HARUHI: (interrupts) Before we go into this, I was wondering if we could change the subject very quickly. I have something I want to talk about.

ICHIGO: Umm okay. What do you want to say Haruhi?

HARUHI: I feel that we need to add a little something to these discussions. In particular, a possible moe aspect.

(They all look confused)

RENTON: A what?

HARUHI: A moe aspect.

RIN: What's moe?

YUKIO: It's basically a fetish or sexual attraction to idealized people. In the case of moe, the attractions towards a perfect young girl.

EUREKA: (disgusted) In other words, it's the poison that's slowly killing anime as we speak.

YOKO: I thought illegal downloading was doing that.

EDWARD: Well, why does Haruhi want to add this moe thing to our discussions?

HARUHI: I'm glad you asked. Well, it seems that we have a certain someone here who represents those traits. (Looks at Chi who becomes nervous)

CHI: (stuttering) Umm…I…I'm not…

HARUHI: (goes up to her) Pretty, tiny, vulnerable, and absolutely adorable to the eye, (slowly reaches out her hand) she's perfect for the job.

(Haruhi's hand is suddenly smacked away by Orihime)

ORIHIME: Not a chance!

HARUHI: What the hell?

(Orihime, Eureka, Yoko, and Rukia gather around Chi)

YOKO: We knew this was the type of thing you would try to pull Haruhi. We saw what you did with your friend Mikuru in your series.

HARUHI: (smirks) Oh so you did watch my show.

ORIHIME: Damn right we did, and we decided we weren't gonna let that happen to Chi. Not by you Haruhi, (turns a death glare to all the boys in the room) or by the other shallow perverts in this household.

(Guys all react with shock and confusion.)

CHI: (confused) Wait so you guys...

LELOUCH: So you guys formed some kind of bodyguard thing for Chi?

EUREKA: That's right and we're dedicated to making sure that Chi's innocence is preserved and protected from Haruhi and from any of the perverts in this house!

RUKIA: In dedication to Protecting Chi's Innocence, we are THE PCI ALLIANCE!

(All three get into poses as a banner that says PCI Alliance appears over them. Starting with Rin, all the guys in the room followed by Haruhi start laughing at the girls.)

EUREKA: What? What?! What are you idiots laughing at?!

SHINJI: (laughing) PCI Alliance?! You gotta be kidding me!

LELOUCH: (laughing) That's really the best name you could come up with?!

YUKIO: (laughing) PCI Alliance! That abbreviation! Are you serious?!

EUREKA: They're right, our name sucks!

YOKO: Rukia was that really the best you could come up with?

ORIHIME: You could've used a lot more imagination on that one, I mean come on.

RUKIA: But…but we only had a couple seconds, I panicked!

CHI: Am I still relevant in this conversation?

YOKO: Well either way, it doesn't matter what you do Haruhi. We're not gonna let you mess with Chi.

HARUHI: Well just because I can't mess with Chi… (suddenly runs away so fast that she can't be seen)

ORIHIME: What the fuck? Where'd she go?

(Suddenly appears behind Yoko)

HARUHI: Doesn't mean I can't mess with you.

YOKO: Huh?

(Grabs Yoko's breasts.)

EUREKA, ORIHIME, RUKIA, CHI: (gasp)

YOKO: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH! NO, NO, NO, NO, NO, NO, NO, NO, NO, NO, NO!

(Haruhi begins to fondle Yoko as she writhes and screams. Everyone in the house looks on in shock)

HARUHI: Especially you Yoko. Look at you, you have the most sex appeal out of all of us. Geez, I can't believe it, we're the same height yet your boobies are ginormous compared to mine.

(Yoko steps on Haruhi's foot causing her to break her grasp.)

YOKO: (angry) YOU PERVERTED BITCH, I'LL FILL YOU FULL OF LEAD!

(Pulls out her sniper rifle and aims it at Haruhi. Eureka and Rukia restrain her.)

ORIHIME: You're ridiculous Haruhi. Measuring a women's self-worth by the size of her bust. I find that particularly offensive. Women are smart and vibrant creatures that deserve much more integrity than people like you or perverted and shallow men believe.

ICHIGO: (whispers) Just to point out for future reference guys, if you compliment a woman by calling her "sexy" then she'll really hit the roof.

SHINJI: (sarcastically) Oh boy that'll be fun.

ICHIGO: Shut up Shinji.

ORIHIME: I for one support the women who do not suffer from the curse of bustiness such as myself. (turns to Yoko) No offense Yoko.

YOKO: None taken Orihime.

ORIHIME: And of course, there's my usual motto "flat chested pride".

(Eureka and Rukia pop up behind Orihime with their thumbs up.)

EUREKA, RUKIA: Flat chested pride.

(Banner appears again.)

HARUHI: That is very ironic Orihime because before you were once one of the most famous large breasted girls in anime. You can't fully speak out for the rights of flat chested women when you aren't really one yourself. Hmph, such a hypocrite.

ORIHIME: (angry) WHY YOU LITTLE!

(is about to punch her in the face when Eureka pulls her back)

HARUHI: At least people in the SOS Brigade understand my needs perfectly, unlike all of you.

EUREKA: You mean the SOS Brigade that doesn't exist.

HARUHI: I'm sorry, did you say something?

EUREKA: Listen Haruhi, I'm going to say this bluntly but try and be fair. Your series is fictional as is mine and everyone else's, you understand?

HARUHI: Mm-hmm.

EUREKA: Your SOS Brigade doesn't exist. It was all a creation made in your series. Where the hell are all the other members anyway?

HARUHI: Around.

(Cuts to Mikuru and Yuki at the bus stop with joints in their mouths. _I Chase the Devil_ plays in the background)

MIKURU: I'm so fucking high man…

(Cuts back to the house)

EUREKA: And also, to get another large thing out of the way. You do not have God like powers.

HARUHI: Of course I do! I can reshape the universe to my own liking!

EUREKA: No, you can't Haruhi, it's all just fiction.

HARUHI: How dare you!? You know what I'll prove it to you!

EUREKA: (smirks) Oh really?

HARUHI: Yeah, I'll reshape the universe and banish you to another realm. Right now!

(Haruhi claps her hands and stands still while Eureka stands there while everyone else in the house is motionless while cricket sound effects play. The camera pans revealing that Rin is playing the sound effects on his phone. Yukio glares at him for a second at which Rin puts away his phone)

RIN: Sorry.

EUREKA: There you see. So Haruhi, can you please just back off a little bit? You're getting way out of line here and you're driving us crazy.

HARUHI: It still doesn't matter, after all.

(Haruhi reaches out her hand and touches Eureka's chest. She smirks.)

HARUHI: Looks like we have a winner for this years Flatty McFlatterson.

(Eureka stands there in shock for a moment. The others, knowing what's coming all take a step back in fear. A dark aura rises from Eureka as she growls in rage.)

EUREKA: (enraged) You…bitch…you...are...so... DEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAD!

(Eureka jumps on Haruhi and begins to attack her in various ways. Punching her, kicking her, and strangling her all the while screaming obscenities at her. The other members of the household get up and try to break up the fight but it starts getting more out of hand.)

NARRATOR: I think we need to take a quick break right now. Tom cut. Cut. CUT!

(The scene cuts before transitioning back. Haruhi is badly beaten with a black eye, cuts and bruises while Eureka is sitting on a couch still fuming.)

ICHIGO: Okay, I think we need to move on now to the situation with the guys. Let's talk a little about my roommates. As we all know, I'm rooming with Edward, Renton and Simon.

RENTON: I think so far after moving in and getting a room, we've adjusted well for the most part.

ICHIGO: I agree with that.

EDWARD: The only real problem that we've had is that Simon snores so loud at night.

SIMON: (defensively) I do not!

RENTON: Yeah Simon, you do.

SIMON: Okay fine, I'm sorry but I can't help it.

ICHIGO: It's no big deal though. I think everyone snores loudly anyway. I'll give you some breathing strips, that'll help. How about the others in Room 2? Rin, Yukio, Lelouch and Shinji.

SHINJI: I'll start off the argument. For one thing, Yukio's sitting around reading manga all the time. I mean of course he's a nice guy to hold a conversation with but he never stops reading. I mean, it's kind of weird how protective he is of that stuff. What is it anyway?

YUKIO: None of your concern, that's what.

LELOUCH: I agree, and not to mention that Rin smokes weed during the night, and we share a bunk so I have to deal with the constant smell of it.

YUKIO: (in his head) At least I don't have to.

RIN: Okay, so I got some things to say about Shinji and Lelouch. For the most part they're nice guys, but they present really annoying problems that are getting on my and Yukio's nerves. For one Lelouch gets scared way too easily by anything. I can't even mention what happened two nights ago, and I'm sure everybody remembers.

(Cuts to Room 2 asleep in their beds. It's probably around 3 AM)

LELOUCH: (bolts awake) AAAAAAAAGGGGGGHHHHHHHH!

SHINJI: JESUS CHRIST!

RIN: WHAT THE SHIT?!

YUKIO: WHO?! WHAT?! WHERE?! WHAT?!

LELOUCH: GUYS, A GHOST IS COMING THROUGH OUR SKYPE ACCOUNTS

(Lelouch runs out over to his laptop)

LELOUCH: WE GOTTA SHUT THEM DOWN BEFORE IT GETS THERE!

SHINJI: Lelouch calm down.

LELOUCH: What?!

YUKIO: You just had a nightmare. You're awake now it's alright.

LELOUCH: (calms down a little) I'm sorry.

RIN: (tired) I knew we shouldn't have rented _Unfriended_.

SHINJI: Yeah but that movie was so stupid. Who keeps a blender in their bedroom?

(Rin puts on an unassuming face followed by Shinji looking at him with a "are you serious?" face)

RIN: Shut up, I'm a cook.

(Door opens revealing some of the others)

ICHIGO: (concerned) Is everything okay?

YUKIO: Yeah, we're fine. Lelouch had a nightmare is all.

SIMON: Oh well that's a relief.

EUREKA: (tiredly rubbing her eyes) You scared the shit out of us.

ORIHIME: Not to mention, it's 3 AM jackasses!

RIN: Alright we get it! Just go back to bed.

(Everyone leaves. Cuts back to the house meeting)

LELOUCH: I'm sorry Rin. I just can't help it. Everything scares me no matter how hard I try.

RIN: Secondly, Shinji is always complaining. It's like every second he gets a word in, he's always complaining about how he's a media whore and he's a disgrace and all that bullshit.

SHINJI: Because I am, do you understand how much of a joke I am!?

RIN: Oh, grow up! Is that all you ever do is just complain? You get to live in a nice house and that doesn't even satisfy you.

YUKIO: He's right there. It's every single day. We're here and none of us are complaining about being media whores because who the fuck cares? We get a nice house to live in for Christ's sake! Jesus, even on Evangelion all you did was complain.

RIN: (imitating Shinji) Oh my mommy's dead. Oh my daddy doesn't love me. Oh I have to pilot a giant robot to save the world. I mustn't run away, I mustn't run away. My God, you're a pathetic little bitch!

SHINJI: Asshole.

RIN: And both of you on me smoking pot. I don't need you guys to tell me about my habits. Sure, I smoke one joint every day, maybe two or three. But whatever happened to freedom of speech and everything. Everybody has a right to something, even if I am the son of Satan or not. Besides, it's not like I'm a stoner or anything.

YUKIO: That is true.

SHINJI: Yeah, well at least my mom didn't put out for Satan because she didn't like how demons had to be killed!

NARRATOR: Oh damn.

RIN: (angry) YOU TAKE THAT BACK!

(Rin bursts into blue flames before punching Shinji, who then punches back and the two engage in a fight, wrestling on the floor. The house members again react)

NARRATOR: Tom cut it again.

(The scene cuts. It comes back showing Rin and Shinji on two separate couches fuming)

ICHIGO: Okay so seeing how we all behaved here, it is obvious there is tension.

NARRATOR: From this, I want to give everyone here some advice. I know that some of you probably can't get along well. But, don't make that stop you from guys from being a team. If there's something that needs to be resolved, team work is the only way to do it. Don't let you guys not getting along keep you from working together as a team. So, what do you all say can we agree to that?

(Most of the people nod in agreement, except for Rin, Shinji, Eureka and Haruhi)

Come on now, do you think we can agree to that?

RIN: (sighs) Well, I guess it wouldn't hurt to try. Sorry I insulted you Shinji.

SHINJI: Yeah, I'll try. I'm sorry what I said about your mom too.

RIN: I hate to say it, but you're not wrong.

NARRATOR: And Eureka?

(Eureka doesn't respond for a couple minutes before groaning.)

EUREKA: (seething) Alright fine, I'll do it.

NARRATOR: And Haruhi?

HARUHI: (in pain) I can't feel my teeth.

NARRATOR: I'll take that as a yes. Well, it's nice to see that we all reached an agreement. So as a special little gift for everyone, how about I order you guys some pizza, my treat.

EVERYONE: Okay.

NARRATOR: Well that's everything for today. I'm your unseen narrator and this has been the first episode of Animes Unite. Join us next time as we see what predicament everyone ends up in.

 **Predicament? Oh boy.**

 **I did lots of heavy editing to this chapter (or episode if you'd rather call it that) from the first time I wrote it. But for me, this was the first time I ever had real genuine fun writing a chapter. Not that I don't have fun writing other works but when you're struggling to come up with ideas on the spot it really takes away the enjoyment. For this, I enjoyed every second of writing this and it gave me confidence to continue the story.**

 **Also, I established various running gags throughout the story in this chapter: The PCI Alliance and people finding the name ridiculous, and the feud between Eureka and Haruhi. In giving Eureka a volatile temper, I found that Haruhi could spend every opportunity trying to get under her skin. Keep an eye out, things may get rough.**

 **So I recently signed up for Casting Call Club and have been pursuing online voice acting, I auditioned currently for three different things and met some really cool people on the website. So we'll see how that goes.**

 **Tune in next chapter, things are gonna start heating up. If you guys have any kind of constructive criticism that you feel should say, don't hesitate to say so. See you all next time.**

 **I own none of the above characters in the aforementioned series. Each belongs to their respective owners:**

 **Bleach is owned by Viz Media, Tite Kubo and Toei Animation  
**

 **Blue Exorcist is owned by Aniplex of America, A-1 Pictures, Kazue Kato and Tensai Okamura  
**

 **Tenga Toppa Gurren Lagann is owned by Aniplex of America, Gainax, Kazuki Nakashima, and Hiroyuki Imaishi  
**

 **Fullmetal Alchemist is owned by Aniplex of America, Funimation Entertainment, Studio Bones and Hiromu Arakawa  
**

 **Code Geass is owned by Funimation Entertainment, Sunrise,** **Ichirō Ōkouchi,** ** **Gor** **ō Taniguchi, and CLAMP  
****

 **The Melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiya is owned by Funimation Entertainment, Kyoto Animation, and Nagaru Tanigawa**

 **Chobits is owned by Funimation Entertainment, Madhouse Studios and CLAMP.**

 **Eureka Seven is owned by Funimation Entertainment, Studio Bones, and Dai Sato.**

 **Neon Genesis Evangelion is owned by AEsir Holdings, Gainax and Hideaki Anno**


	3. Episode 2: We Ain't Gonna Pay Rent

**Hello everyone! Welcome to the second episode of Animes Unite. In this episode, the characters are faced with the first of many challenges presented to them by the producers of this show. This challenge, they need to solve in a certain amount of time or face dire consequences. Will they be able to resolve it together? Or, will they fail and have to deal with the drastic consequences? Let's find out.  
**

 **Warning: Violence, language, adult situations**

 **Episode 2: We Ain't Gonna Pay Rent**

NARRATOR: Welcome back to Animes Unite. Last episode, the characters first moved in to their new home and are getting accustomed to living together. We learned that most of them do not get along very well, but I gave them the advice that they should still work together as a team, hoping it would benefit them in some regard. Today, it seems something is about to be presented to them. Something, they may not yet be ready for. Let's take a look.

(Scene opens with the house in the morning. Birds are chirping, the sun is shining, everything is peaceful. Lelouch walks out of the house.)

LELOUCH: (happy) Ah what a beautiful day. A nice day to get the mail.

(Walks over to the mailbox humming and pulls out the letters before walking back to the house. He goes inside, everyone is sitting around doing various activities.)

LELOUCH: Hey guys.

EVERYONE: Hey Lelouch!

LELOUCH: Guess what? We got some mail today.

RUKIA: Oh really? From where.

LELOUCH: Let's see.

(Lelouch breezes through the envelopes in his hands, throwing each of them away without a care.)

LELOUCH: (nonchalantly) Junk mail, advertisements, flyers for Jehovah's Witnesses, rent notice…

RENTON: Hold on, did you just say rent notice?

LELOUCH: Oh yeah I did.

(They all get up from their seats)

YUKIO: Open it up.

(The envelope is opened. Ichigo reads the letter.)

ICHIGO: To the members of this house. We are writing to inform you that we cannot let the rent on this house slide any longer. In total, you owe us a sum of $2,468 for heating, plumbing, and all the necessary living expenses. If you do not have this money to us in eight days, you will all be evicted from the house. Also enclosed in this envelope is a lollipop, courtesy of our employer. Have a nice day.

(Everyone stares at the letter in complete and utter shock.)

EVERYONE: (terrified) AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!

(Everyone is shown freaking out, except for Chi who stands there calmly sucking on the lollipop.)

NARRATOR: Everyone calm down! It's an easily resolvable issue. The producers own the house so they technically have to be the ones to pay it. (Everyone calms down a little bit) There you all go. So don't worry, they'll just pay it upfront and-

(The sound of the "Cat Party" ringtone by Frisky Dingo plays. Everyone looks on in confusion, it turns out it's the Narrator's cell phone.)

NARRATOR: (embarrassed laugh) Hold on a second everyone.

RUKIA: That's not really that great of a ringtone.

ORIHIME: Yeah, maybe if he changed it to something a little more catchy it'd be cool.

NARRATOR: Yeah, I'll keep that in mind. Hello. Hold on. It's the producers. Yeah, they just got it in the mail, I was just about to tell you that… Wait what? You're not serious. No, you can't do that to them, some of them are kids come on! No I won't do it. What? No, you can't… Goddammit, fine I'll tell them. Jesus Christ.

ICHIGO: What's the problem?

NARRATOR: They just told me that we're not supposed to help you guys with this.

EVERYONE: WHAT?!

NARRATOR: I know, I'm just as shocked as all of you are. However, this is part of the list of challenges we have planned for you all.

EDWARD: Challenges?

NARRATOR: That's right Ed. During certain points in the show, you'll all receive a certain challenge that you have to complete. Failure to complete these challenges results in drastic consequences. For this one, you have to come up with the rent to the house, and if you end up evicted than you have to find a way to get back in. Trust me though, I have no idea why they would create a challenge like this, and I'd get you all out of it if I could.

YOKO: Well why can't you?

NARRATOR: Otherwise they'll fire me. I'm sorry guys, but you must understand I have a wife and kid at home and I have to keep food on the table.

EDWARD: How about I just use a transmutation circle and get the cash here.

NARRATOR: No, they won't allow that. That's technically cheating. And also, potential counterfeiting which is illegal.

EDWARD: Damn it!

RIN: Well then what do we do?

NARRATOR: Well they suggested that you all go out and get certain jobs. We've seen that you all have certain talents, so just go out and find a job that fits that talent.

SHINJI: That doesn't sound that easy.

NARRATOR: You'd be surprised, they gave me this job because I had the most attractive voice. I'm sure each of every one of you has your own unique talents. So go out and put them to good use. It'll be worth it in the long run.

RENTON: You know, I actually feel confident in being able to pull that off now. Why don't we go do it?

EUREKA: I'm with Renton on this, we've got our talents so let's use them. Who's in?

EVERYONE: (all raise their hands) Me!

NARRATOR: That's the spirit everybody! Now go out and there and find some employment!

(All fourteen members head for the door, each discussing their own individual plans for getting jobs.)

NARRATOR: We're gonna go to commercial break now and when we get back let's see how everyone did with getting new jobs.

…

NARRATOR: Welcome back to Animes Unite. Last time, the group was presented with the first house challenge and that was to pay the rent on the house. I gave them the advice to go out and get jobs to pay it off. So let's see how they've done since we left.

(Cuts to the interview desk with Ichigo.)

ICHIGO: So, for my job, I'm a truck driver.

(Shows Ichigo driving a truck. He looks pissed.)

ICHIGO: LISTEN MAN! I NEED YOU TO GET THESE FUCKING CHICKENS TO THE DAMN FARM NOW!

(Cuts back to interview desk, Ichigo has the friendly demeanor again.)

ICHIGO: I used to yell a lot on Bleach so that comes in handy when talking to other drivers. Didn't know I still had it in me.

NARRATOR: Kinda cool you got to put some old talent to use Ichigo.

(Cuts to Edward.)

EDWARD: I'm a chemistry lab assistant. Alchemy is heavily similar, so it's all a breeze for me.

NARRATOR: Very convenient

(Shows Edward in a lab helping a scientist to create new concoctions.)

EDWARD: So now you add the dry yeast to the hydrogen peroxide and that allows a creation of elephant toothpaste. Fun experiment for all the kids to learn at school.

SCIENTIST: Thank you very much Edward. It's good to have an assistant with as big an interest in science as you.

EDWARD: The pleasure is all mine sir.

(Edward reaches out to shake his hand. The scientist is then shocked by Edward's alchemy powers, he falls back and faints.)

EDWARD: (frantically) Sorry! When they replaced my arm they didn't properly fix it, so it does that sometimes!

SCIENTIST: (weakly) It's okay. Happens all the time.

(Cuts to Haruhi.)

HARUHI: I got to get a job doing advertising for a local café called Maid Latte.

NARRATOR: That sounds cool. How'd your day go with it?

HARUHI: Well today didn't go so good.

NARRATOR: Why not?

(cuts to Haruhi out on the street wearing a slightly revealing maid costume for a café waving at people outside. A fat driver drives up)

DRIVER: Hey there honey want a lift? You and I can go to a hotel!

(Haruhi blushes furiously at the man's advances.)

HARUHI: (embarrased) Hey I'm like sixteen you creep!

DRIVER: Even better!

HARUHI: Get out of here!

(Driver leaves Haruhi standing there with a deep blush.)

HARUHI: (In her head) This is so embarrassing. I was used to doing this with Mikuru all the time, but this feels so demeaning.

NARRATOR: (in his head) Well it seems she finally got a taste of her own medicine.

(Cuts to Lelouch.)

LELOUCH: Traffic monitor.

NARRATOR: How'd that work out for you.

LELOUCH: Well, I got to put my Geass to use with it.

(Cuts to Lelouch directing traffic. He then uses his Geass powers on an passing driver.)

LELOUCH: I, Lelouch vi Britannia, command you to let them pass!

(The driver lets various people pass. Lelouch unconciously steps out in the middle of the road.)

LELOUCH: (in his head) Alright, looks like my Geass powers haven't failed me yet.

DRIVER: HEY KID LOOK OUT!

LELOUCH: Hmm?

(Lelouch looks and sees driver heading towards him. His eyes widen.)

LELOUCH: ACK!

(Lelouch jumps back on the sidewalk in fright)

NARRATOR: At least you're putting your abilities to good use.

(Cuts to Orihime.)

ORIHIME: Motivational speaker. Figured I'd send my message out a little deeper.

(Cuts to Orihime at a gathering of women. She's holding a microphone in her hand.)

ORIHIME: (powerfully) To all my fellow flat sisters. I say flat chested pride!

RANDOM PEOPLE: FLAT CHESTED PRIDE!

(Flat Chested Pride Banner appears again.)

NARRATOR: Hmm, very interesting.

(Cuts to Shinji.)

SHINJI: I don't know why, but I decided to try my hand at psychiatric evaluation. Just going and talking with therapy patients.

(pause)

NARRATOR: Very ironic.

(Cuts individually to the members of the house as they discuss their individual jobs. With each person it shows a little snippet of what they're doing.)

YOKO: Sniper for the SWAT Team.

CHI: Customer service at Best Buy.

RIN: Chef at a fancy French restaurant.

YUKIO: Cram school teacher.

RENTON: Mechanic.

RUKIA: Coffee shop waitress.

EUREKA: Club bouncer.

(Pause)

NARRATOR: Seriously?

EUREKA: Yeah! Check out what I got to do today.

(Cuts to Eureka, wearing black clothes, sunglasses, and a name tag welcoming people into a club.)

EUREKA: Thank you. Come on inside sir.

(A tall muscular man walks up to her. He's got a smug look on his face.)

MUSCLE GUY: What're you doing here little girl? Selling cookies?

EUREKA: No, I'm not a girl scout. I happen to be the bouncer here.

MUSCLE GUY: (sarcastically) Oh, I'm so scared of a little tiny girl bouncer.

EUREKA: (smirking) Do you really want to mess with me?

MUSCLE GUY: (sarcastically) Oh I'm sorry, I didn't know I was supposed to be messing with a tiny blue haired girl named (looks at her name tag) _Eureka_.

(Camera pans from her name tag up to her face, looking very angry.)

EUREKA: (seething) Alright that's it, you crossed the line.

(Grabs the muscle guy's crotch area. His voice goes into a high feminine falsetto.)

MUSCLE GUY: (in pain) AAAAAAAAHHH! I'M SORRY!

EUREKA: (enraged) GET LOST!

(She tosses him away and sends him flying down the street.)

EUREKA: (enraged) AND DON'T COME AROUND HERE AGAIN!

(Cuts back to Eureka at the desk)

EUREKA: Why do they constantly pronounce my name wrong? I mean it's not that hard. Ehl-rek-uh, not fucking Yoo-Reek-Uh.

NARRATOR: Well that's because most people, when they see the spelling do pronounce it that way. Especially if they're from California or Kansas, since they're both towns in either place.

EUREKA: Well, it's annoying!

…

YUKIO: So, it seems that with the jobs we got, we've got the rent we have to pay in the bag.

(Rin puts his hand on Yukio's shoulder)

RIN: You said it brother.

RENTON: Hey I got a question. If we get the rent payed then can we quit our jobs?

NARRATOR: Yes you all can. This is all part of the challenge to get the money. Once you get the money and the challenge is completed, then you can all quit your jobs and go back to what you were doing before.

RENTON: (overjoyed) Sweet.

SIMON: Hey I was thinking, since we managed to beat this, how about we go out tonight and celebrate.

YOKO: That sounds great.

RUKIA: Sure, let's go do it.

CHI: Hey guys, I was just looking at the letter. It's slightly folded by some tape right here.

EDWARD: Oh, does that mean we missed something?

LELOUCH: Let's take a look.

(Chi unfolds the paper. It reveals that the true price is really 24,268 dollars. Everyone looks on with the same shocked faces as last time.)

EVERYONE: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH!

(Everyone runs around the house screaming, yelling, and doing insane things. Chi is still there calmly looking at the letter.)

NARRATOR: I think we need to cut for a bit.

(The show cuts before coming back, showing everyone sitting in the living room with despondent faces)

RENTON: I can't believe it. We got all of these jobs for nothing. We can't pay it off in time!

SIMON: There's got to be another way!

ICHIGO: But how though? Narrator, can't you try to convince the producers to cut us a little slack.

NARRATOR: Nope sorry, I called them after you guys found out. They want you to pay off all the rent. I won't lie guys, this is probably the most unreasonable challenge they could've given you. Out of all the things, why did this have to be the first?

EDWARD: Maybe we could try and work two different jobs each, that way we can bring in some extra cash.

YUKIO: Nah that would be way too difficult. Besides we couldn't get more than 25,000 in time.

YOKO: Not to mention, I'm already doing different shifts with the SWAT team job I got. It pays well, but it still can't get us where we're going.

CHI: And Best Buy isn't open all day so I can't do late hours.

EUREKA: Well, I guess that's it. We're fucked. By next week we're gonna be living on the goddamn streets.

NARRATOR: Hey don't say that! You can't just give up now. There's probably many more options to work with.

RIN: Like hell there is. At this moment, our only reasonable option is to rob the bank.

(Everyone goes silent suddenly.)

YOKO: That idea…may just be crazy enough…TO LAND US ALL IN JAIL!

(Everyone begins ranting on how bad the idea is)

RUKIA: That's totally insane!

SHINJI: Are you out of your mind?!

LELOUCH: You're not serious!

HARUHI: You're supposed to be the son of Satan and you're that stupid?!

NARRATOR: I have to agree with them Rin, that's a horrible idea. The one thing that we want to ensure is that you're all staying out of major trouble. There's no way that we can pull something like that off.

RIN: It was just a joke.

NARRATOR: Joke or not, it's not happening.

(Phone rings again. This time it's the song I Just Died in Your Arms by Cutting Crew.)

NARRATOR: Excuse me.

EDWARD: That's a little better.

HARUHI: Still a little awkward though.

NARRATOR: Hello. Oh, you just heard it? I know it's stupid right. What? You can't be serious. Do you know how dangerous that it, they could get… Alright fine, I'll tell them.

ORIHIME: Who was that?

NARRATOR: It was the producers again. They overheard Rin's little comment, and they proposed that you all try and rob the bank!

EVERYONE: WHAT?!

RIN: You're fucking kidding me, I was just joking. There's no way I'm gonna do that.

NARRATOR: Doesn't seem like we have much of a choice. They're very insistent that you guys go out and do it. So it seems like you have to come up with a plan in order to ensure you do it correctly. It's all up to you guys.

SIMON: Nice going Rin.

RIN: I'm sorry, I didn't expect that the producers were gonna forget their meds and make us commit robbery.

ICHIGO: Well it doesn't matter now. Now we have to come up with a plan to get the money.

SHINJI: Well anybody got any ideas?

LELOUCH: I think I might. But, where's the nearest bank?

EDWARD: About ten minutes from here. Why?

LELOUCH: I'll be right back (runs out the door very quickly).

(Ten Minutes Later, Lelouch comes back into the house with a paper in his hands.)

LELOUCH: I'm back.

RUKIA: What was all that about?

LELOUCH: I got a full view of the bank.

(Shows Lelouch inside the bank).

LELOUCH: I went in saying that I wanted to open a savings account and when I had the chance, I looked over every aspect of the bank and I came up with an idea for us to get in there undetected.

YUKIO: Wow, that's definitely good strategy there.

RENTON: Well remember in Code Geass. He was a brilliant strategist when it came to battles.

LELOUCH: That's right. Now let's sit down and come up with an amazingly awesome plan to how we're gonna rob this bank.

SHINJI: It doesn't sound like it'll be all that awesome.

LELOUCH: Shut up Shinji.

NARRATOR: And let's go to commercial for a couple minutes while we see how you guys manage to come up with this.

…

NARRATOR: Welcome back to Animes Unite. As our guests tried to come up with ideas on how to go through with this robbery. (groan), Let's see what they got it.

(Shows the entire household gathered around a table)

LELOUCH: So, let's go through the plan. There'll be two set groups, guy and gals. The guys will be the ones going through with the robbery. Three guys that being Shinji, Yukio and Simon will stay back in the car watching for suspicious activity from bystanders, if anything goes awry you'll be the ones to get us out of there.

RENTON: But none of us can drive.

ICHIGO: Uh hello, you know there's a guy here who was just working as a truck driver earlier.

SIMON: I can drive too.

(Ichigo looks at Simon.)

SIMON: Bro taught me when I was nine. Don't ask questions.

YUKIO: There's also another issue we haven't addressed. We don't own a car.

EDWARD: I can solve that.

(Edward walks outside to the driveway. He draws a transmutation circle on the ground. Using his powers, he summons a station wagon.)

EDWARD: Problem solved.

HARUHI: Alchemists are fucking amazing!

EDWARD: (cocky) Well, thank you very much.

LELOUCH: Anyway, continuing with the plan, the five other guys, that being me, Ichigo, Rin, Renton and Edward will go in and rob the place. We'll sneak in around back through the ventilation system and work our way into the vault where we'll take the money, get back in the vents, then get the fuck out of there. On the other hand, the gals will stay back here and monitor us to make sure that we don't get ourselves in trouble, or worse.

RIN: Wait how come none of the girls can help us rob the bank?

LELOUCH: (whispers to Rin) Orihime told me that none of the girls were gonna be involved physically in any robbery, no matter what any of us say.

RIN: Oh I see.

EUREKA: Well, I wouldn't mind helping out with the robbery.

YOKO: Yeah, I don't see why-

(Orihime runs up to both of them and puts her hands on their shoulders)

ORIHIME: No, no, no we're delicate girls. Always being put to work, let's let the men do the job this time.

EUREKA: You know this seems even more sexist than you think.

ORIHIME: No it's not.

EUREKA: Yeah it kind of is.

ORIHIME: (calmly) Eureka, shut the fuck up.

EUREKA: Okay.

LELOUCH: Don't worry girls, you'll still be doing us a lot more help than you think. Especially you Chi.

CHI: Me?

LELOUCH: That's right, after all you're a computer. Speaking of which, do you still have that big desktop setup you made?

CHI: Uh-huh.

(Cuts to all of them in the room where Chi has six computers set up. Chi has connected herself to the main computer and is trying to get into the bank system.)

LELOUCH: Using Chi, we can hack into the bank's computer system and gain control of the cameras so we can keep even better watch. Eureka, Haruhi, Yoko, Orihime and Rukia will sit at the other five computers, each displaying a different part of the bank and keep watch. Through it all, we'll be speaking through mini-microphones, so you'll be able to help us all the way.

(Lelouch holds up tiny earbud microphones and hands them to each of the girls.)

YOKO: Sounds good to me.

SIMON: What if anything goes wrong Lelouch? We'll need an immediate escape plan, right?

LELOUCH: That'll be where Edward comes in. Remember those substances you concocted recently at your chem assistant job?

EDWARD: You mean the smoke bombs?

LELOUCH: Right. When activated, after one minute and thirty seconds, these bombs will overwhelm the entire bank with smoke. Not only that, it's filled with a substance that'll knock everyone out too. It'll give us a guaranteed and safe escape. We'll plant them in the bank before we go in through the vents, and the girls will activate them if anything goes wrong.

CHI: I'm in. I got full view of all the cameras throughout the main hallways.

(Computer monitors show different camera angles of the bank)

ORIHIME: Sweet. So basically, all we gotta do is sit here and make sure you guys make it out alright.

LELOUCH: Yes indeed. So are we all clear on the plan?

EVERYONE: Yep.

LELOUCH: Alright then. Time to get out there and kick some serious ass. LET'S GO!

GUYS: YEAH!

(All run out the door to the car. As they're driving out on to the road they nearly hit a passing car.)

GUYS: Asshoooooooole!

(The girls see this from the window)

RUKIA: This isn't gonna end well, is it?

EUREKA: With those eight, are you kidding?

YOKO: Well let's wait and see.

ORIHIME: Alright, let's get our earplugs and start monitoring them.

HARUHI: Let's do this.

NARRATOR: Well, it seems they may have a plan going, but I won't say I'm without my doubts. Let's see how this goes.

(Guys are driving their car towards the bank and reach the outside. Blues Brothers theme plays.)

ICHIGO: Well this is it, no turning back now. Actually, this would be even more awesome if we wore suits, glasses, hats and sang the blues.

EDWARD: You can watch Blues Brothers when we get home, let's stay focused.

LELOUCH: Okay, so a little repeat on the plan. We'll head in through the back. Simon, Yukio and Shinji you guys stay here and keep watch. If anything goes wrong and we need you, be ready to act.

RENTON: Wait Lelouch. I just realized something. Why can't you just use your Geass to hypnotize everyone to let us into the bank and steal the loot?

LELOUCH: Am I allowed to use that?

NARRATOR: Nope, the producers just texted me. That would make the challenge too easy. You're forbidden to use any kind of special ability that would potentially complete the challenge quickly.

RENTON: This really sucks.

LELOUCH: I really hate those producers.

NARRATOR: We all do.

(Everyone except Simon, Yukio and Shinji gets out)

YUKIO: Hey did you notice there's a Dunkin Donuts right here?

SIMON: Oh yeah, that's awesome.

SHINJI: How about I run in and grab us a couple?

YUKIO: Sounds good.

(Shinji gets out of the car and goes in)

SIMON: Do you think that Lelouch had him stay with us in the car because he didn't think he'd be cut out for the robbery?

YUKIO: Do you think he would be?

SIMON: Probably not. He'd just whine that reality TV has turned him into a criminal now.

YUKIO: We can't say he's wrong though.

SIMON: Yeah.

ORIHIME: (on microphone) Okay guys. Even though the entrance is through the back, if you all go in together it'll seem suspicious on the streets. Everybody find a way to get in separately and then meet up around back.

RUKIA: Also, whoever has the smoke bomb. Go inside the bank quickly, plant it there and then leave.

ICHIGO: Got it Orihime and Rukia.

(They do that and each go in different directions, eventually meeting up around the back. Nobody on the street seems to expect them at all.)

RENTON: Okay we're all in the back together.

EUREKA: Good, so now you're gonna hop on the dumpster and jump through the vent. Be careful though, it's a hard jump.

EDWARD: I'll go first. Here goes nothing.

(Edward jumps on the closed dumpster and pulls open the vent hopping up into it and climbing in.)

EDWARD: I'm in.

RIN: My turn

(Rin also gets on the dumpster and jumps in. Eventually, everyone follows suit and they make it into the vents.)

LELOUCH: Okay, we're all in.

YOKO: Good, now this is where everything is in your hands. We don't know where the vault is supposed to be because there's no cameras in the vents. It's all up to you guys.

ICHIGO: No problem, we'll be able to see everything from the vents. How is everything looking for us on the cameras.

YOKO: Well there's nothing suspicious on my monitor.

EUREKA: Nothing on mine.

RUKIA: I got nothing.

ORIHIME: Everything's fine.

HARUHI: Yup it's alright.

CHI: On mine, there's just some regular customers going in. That's all.

RENTON: Okay let's get through this ventilation shaft and try to get to the vault.

(They try to get to find the vault but they're having difficulty. They look around for a long time but still cannot find the vault.)

EDWARD: Nope, not this one either.

RENTON: Well we're lost.

LELOUCH: No, we're not lost.

ICHIGO: Are you sure?

LELOUCH: Yeah we're lost.

RIN: Hey you guys wanna hear some jokes?

EVERYONE: No

(Shows the girls sitting at their computers bored out of their minds)

RIN: Too bad cause I'm saying it. How do you get holy water?

EVERYONE: How?

RIN: Boil the hell out of it.

HARUHI: Well considering you're the son of the Satan that joke does have some edge to it.

RIN: Here's another one. What does a clock do when it's hungry?

EVERYONE: (annoyed) What?

RIN: It goes back four seconds.

EUREKA: (rubbing her head) That one sucked so much that it hurt.

RIN: Another one. What do they call a-

RENTON: Guys I found it!

RIN: Hey I'm telling a joke here!

ICHIGO: Shut up Rin! He's got something. What'd you find Renton?

RENTON: Look. (points forward) This is the entrance to the vault!

GIRLS: Finally.

EDWARD: Well I'll be. Let's head in.

LELOUCH: Hey girls. Is there anyone outside the vault or near it right now.

ORIHIME: Nope you guys are good. Head on in. Just make sure to keep quiet when heading in.

RUKIA: Right, don't let the vent fall down on the floor.

(Lelouch kicks open the vent but makes sure to grab the opening to avoid noise)

LELOUCH: (jokingly) Open sesame.

(Each person jumps into the room. They look around in wonder. It's filled with so much money)

EVERYONE: HALLE-FUCKING-LUJAH!

LELOUCH: We hit the jackpot! All thanks to my plan.

HARUHI: Hey idiots don't get cocky. We're not done yet.

EUREKA: Just grab as much as you can, put it in your bags and then get out.

GUYS: RIGHT!

(They start loading up as much cash as they can into their bags)

RIN: Hahaha, I swear, I'll be able to buy all the sukiyaki that I want with this!

EDWARD: Not only that, I can finally turn the basement into my own science lab.

ORIHIME: Yeah just wait until you're paying for the damages you cause.

EDWARD: Sorry, I don't understand radical feminists.

ORIHIME: Shut up pipsqueak!

EDWARD: (enraged) GRRRRR DON'T CALL ME A PIPSQUEAK!

(Ichigo slaps Edward out of his rage)

ICHIGO: Stay focused Ed, gather up as much as you can.

RENTON: I think this is more than enough.

YOKO: Good job boys. Now get yourselves out of there.

GUYS: Right.

GIRLS: (sigh in relief, turning away from their monitors)

RUKIA: Well I'd say this was easy.

CHI: I guess they're not as idiotic as we thought.

(Everyone starts climbing into the vents. As Rin is about to head up he feels himself stepping on something. Alarms start sounding. The monitors on the computers turn to static)

LELOUCH: What the fuck?!

YOKO: What's happening!? What's wrong with the monitors!?

CHI: The security alarms went off!

EUREKA: But how!? They made it in undetected!

RIN: (scared) Oh crap, I think I stepped on a trigger.

EDWARD: RIN YOU GODDAMN IDIOT!

RIN: I'm sorry I didn't know.

ICHIGO: It doesn't matter, Rin get inside the vent and let's get going. Girls activate the smoke bombs.

(Rin climbs into the vent and they pull the opening back on)

RENTON: (into his microphone) Shinji, Yukio, Simon come in.

YUKIO: Guys are you alright?!

ICHIGO: The alarms sounded, they're on to us!

HARUHI: Get the car started and once they get out, make a bolt for it!

SHINJI: Don't worry it's not-

SIMON: Wait, I just remembered something…

YOKO: What is it Simon? What's wrong?

(Pause)

SIMON: Did I leave the stove on?

(Girls eyes go wide in shock)

EUREKA: (stands up) Give me a second.

(She runs downstairs to the kitchen and finds the stove is smoking, it suddenly bursts into flames)

EUREKA: OH SHIT! GUYS HELP, THE STOVE'S ON FIRE!

(Grabs water from the sink and tries to douse the flames)

YOKO: (runs downstairs) HOLY CRAP!

(Runs over to Eureka and tries to help her put the fire out. Haruhi, Chi, Orihime and Rukia run downstairs)

ORIHIME: Rukia, go get the fire hydrant!

RUKIA: Gotcha.

(Haruhi, Orihime and Chi run and begin to grab water from the sink)

HARUHI: IT'S NOT WORKING!

(Rukia runs into the room)

RUKIA: WE DON'T HAVE A FIRE HYDRANT!

ORIHIME: OH COME ON!

HARUHI: Wait, I got an idea. Give me a second I'll be right back!

(runs back upstairs)

EUREKA: If we don't put this out soon it's gonna-

(The fire gets even larger and explodes, hitting Chi and sending Eureka flying, hitting her head against the counter)

EUREKA: (weakly) …do that.

HARUHI: (runs into the room with a fire blanket) We can use this!

(Haruhi throws the fire blanket over the fire and it extinguishes it immediately.)

GIRLS: (coughing and gagging)

ORIHIME: (coughing) Okay, okay, I think it's all gone.

YOKO: (coughing) That was good thinking Haruhi. Good job.

EUREKA: (coughing) Yeah but where'd you get a fire blanket?

(The smoke stars clearing)

HARUHI: Regular blankets are too ordinary and boring. I like the feel of fire blankets better.

RUKIA: You're really weird.

HARUHI: I know.

(Chi is lying face down on the ground. Eureka runs over to her)

EUREKA: Chi are you alright?!

(Turns her over)

CHI: I…I…I think so.

(Part of Chi's face was burned by the fire, revealing an exoskeleton underneath. Her upper left eye has been burned revealing a glowing red eye and the right bottom part of her mouth has also been burned off. Some of her hands, hair, and other parts are burned as well. Eureka reacts in fear)

EUREKA: AAAGGGHHH! (jumps away) THAT'S SO DISGUSTING!

CHI: (gets up) Eureka what's the matter?

EUREKA: STAY THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME! DON'T COME ANY CLOSER DEMON!

YOKO: Hey Eureka relax, it's still Chi.

ORIHIME: Yeah it's still her.

(Orihime takes a glance and gets uncomfortable)

ORIHIME: Just... looking a little different.

CHI: Do I look bad?

HARUHI: Well…(holds up a mirror) take a look.

CHI: (frightened) CHIII! I look awful! (starts crying)

RUKIA: (comforting) It's okay Chi don't worry. Once we get the money we'll get you repaired. It's an easy fix.

(Eureka shudders in fear at the sight of Chi, who then turns to face her.)

EUREKA: (disgusted) Eww…Stop looking at me. You like the Terminator face-fucked Freddy Fazbear.

(Chi looks down in sadness)

HARUHI: Wow that was rude!

EUREKA: You're one to talk!

HARUHI: Besides you're the one who suggested creating that "PCI Alliance" thing to be protecting of Chi didn't you? But it doesn't seem like you're being protective at the moment.

EUREKA: (looks off to the side) We really need to change that name.

YOKO: I swear I'm gonna beat the shit out of Simon when they get back here. If only Kamina was- (starts crying again).

EUREKA: (comforts her) It's okay, it's alright. He's in a better place now.

YOKO: (crying) He could get us out of this situation faster. Probably not, but he'd have a brasher decision that'd save us all.

ORIHIME: That reminds me. Guys are you all okay?

ICHIGO: We're fine, we're almost out.

LELOUCH: (points) There's the entrance we came in!

RENTON: We gotta move faster!

(They crawl even faster, reaching the entrance and all jumping out to the dumpster)

EDWARD: Let's bail!

RIN: Remember we have to go separately so they won't expect us!

ICHIGO: Right!

(They each run out from separate spots and make it to the car where Yukio, Shinji and Simon are waiting)

SHINJI: Get in guys!

(They all get in.)

GUYS: (sigh with relief)

RENTON: We made it out alive. But I can't believe we set the alarms off.

SIMON: What do you mean? The alarms didn't go off because of you guys.

LELOUCH: Are you kidding? Of course they did, Rin said he stepped on something in the vault.

SHINJI: Nope it wasn't you guys.

ICHIGO: But then who?

YUKIO: You'll never believe this, it's completely hilarious.

(Cuts to Yukio, Simon and Shinji sitting in the car eating donuts and talking)

SIMON: So, there was like five of these assholes right? They were the biggest dipshits I've ever met.

SHINJI: Like the producers of this show.

YUKIO: Shut up Shinji.

SIMON: Hey look at that guy out there.

(See a guy at a hotdog stand with a walkie-talkie. He suddenly puts on a robber mask)

YUKIO: What the hell is he doing?

WEIRD GUY: LEROOOOOOOOOOOOOY JEEEEEEEEEENKIIIINS!

(Guy suddenly runs into the bank causing the alarms to go off. Yukio, Simon and Shinji sit there in shock.)

YUKIO, SIMON, SHINJI: (quietly) What…the…hell?

(Cuts back to everyone in the car.)

RENTON: (laughing) So someone else had the same idea of robbing the bank.

SIMON: Not only that, but they get framed for it. And we get off scot free with all the cash in the world.

YOKO: Be prepared though, because we're using some of that to pay for Chi's repairs. I swear Simon, you're going down when you guys get back here.

SIMON: Eh I can take the heat.

ORIHIME: Wait I just remembered. Did the smoke bombs go off at all? I remember you telling us to activate it and we did.

EDWARD: Oh yeah, I should mention. I forgot to bring those, they're on the kitchen table in the house. Sorry.

(All the girls turn around and see the bombs sitting on the table, seconds away from blowing up.)

GIRLS: RUUUUUUUUUN!

(All the girls run outside the house and jump on the front lawn as the bombs go off, engulfing the house with smoke. After a second they all get up)

YOKO: Well it seems we'll have to wait a half an hour before we can go back inside.

ORIHIME: Oh great. Great! JUST GREAT! THEY COULD NOT HAVE FUCKED THIS UP EVEN FURTHER! WHY DO WE ROOM WITH THESE IDIOTS?! WHY?!

EUREKA: Hold on a second! We got the money didn't we? It's all taken care of.

RUKIA: She's right, it's all over now.

EUREKA: After we pay off the rent, we won't have to deal with shit like this again. We'll finally be able to have some peace and-

(As she's walking, a rake suddenly comes up and smacks her in the face.)

HARUHI: Oooh, right in the face.

(It falls to the ground as Eureka slowly starts to become enraged. All the other girls take several steps back.)

EUREKA: (seething) Who left the rake in the middle of the driveway?

SHINJI: (heard on the microphone) Guilty.

EUREKA: (enraged) I'M GONNA KILL THOSE FUCKERS!

…

(Car pulls up to the house and all of the guys get out hauling the bags of money they got)

LELOUCH: WOO! Yeah-ha-ha! We did it!

RENTON: We pay off the rent tomorrow and the challenge is finally completed.

EDWARD: Not to mention with all the extra money, we can do whatever we want.

SHINJI: Hey, where do you guys think the girls are?

ICHIGO: I have no idea, you'd think they'd be outside waiting for us.

(The garage slowly opens up. The guys gain wide eyed faces. It's Eureka on a bulldozer, she's smiling evilly and has a look of malice in her eyes.)

EUREKA: Hello boys.

RENTON: (nervously) Uhh, hi Eureka, what's up?

EUREKA: (smiling) Oh nothing much. But it seems you eight have caused a lot of trouble today, haven't you?

YUKIO: What do you mean? We got the money didn't we? Look, whatever you're doing, I don't think this is right.

SIMON: Where'd you get a friggin bulldozer?

EUREKA: I have my ways, and after much consideration, I've thought it through, and I've decided something.

EVERYONE: What?

EUREKA: (sadistically) I'm going to plow the streets with all eight of you.

(All stand there frozen in fear)

SHINJI: (whispering) This is the part where we run.

RIN: No shit.

GUYS: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!

EUREKA: (maniacally) HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

(They all take off running in the other direction as Eureka follows them on her bulldozer laughing maniacally.)

RIN: Guys, do you all think Eureka needs a little touch of therapy?!

YUKIO: Maybe more like a massive touch!

EUREKA: WATCH OUT BITCHES! EUREKA IS ON THE LOOSE!

(The other girls are standing back at the house watching Eureka's rampage.)

RUKIA: Should we do something?

ORIHIME: Eh fuck it, they deserve it.

CHI: What do we do now then?

YOKO: Well we can get you fixed up first and then, I guess we can go see a movie or something.

HARUHI: Oooh, can we go see that new Adam Sandler movie?

GIRLS: No.

HARUHI: Aww, you guys are no fun.

NARRATOR: Okay, I think we need to call it a day here. Tune in next time and we'll see how everyone makes out after this little thing. I'm your unseen narrator and this is Animes Unite.

 **Looks like they aren't gonna make out well, as far as I know.**

 **Really a lot of fun getting to write this chapter. I think I wrote this entire thing last year during the Christmas season while recovering from heavy surgery. I hadn't looked back at this chapter for a while, but after seeing it again, I had to make some heavy revisions to it. Surprisingly, the changes didn't take too terribly long to make. The title is also a reference to one of the lyrics from the title song of the Broadway musical Rent, one of my all time favorite musicals.  
**

 **For those wondering about the Leroy Jenkins joke I put in earlier. That was actually a reference to a live action short film that I saw on YouTube that recreated the famous Leroy Jenkins scene from World of Warcraft. I couldn't resist the temptation to put it in. If you'd like to see that video, here's a link right here.**

 **watch?v=Rj22DbRoAPM**

 **Anyway, hope you guys enjoyed this episode, and I'll see you all next time.**

 **I own none of the above characters in the aforementioned series. Each belongs to their respective owners:**

 **Bleach is owned by Viz Media, Tite Kubo and Toei Animation  
**

 **Blue Exorcist is owned by Aniplex of America, A-1 Pictures, Kazue Kato and Tensai Okamura  
**

 **Tenga Toppa Gurren Lagann is owned by Aniplex of America, Gainax, Kazuki Nakashima, and Hiroyuki Imaishi  
**

 **Fullmetal Alchemist is owned by Aniplex of America, Funimation Entertainment, Studio Bones and Hiromu Arakawa  
**

 **Code Geass is owned by Funimation Entertainment, Sunrise,** **Ichirō Ōkouchi,** ** **Gor** **ō Taniguchi, and CLAMP  
****

 **The Melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiya is owned by Funimation Entertainment, Kyoto Animation, and Nagaru Tanigawa**

 **Chobits is owned by Funimation Entertainment, Madhouse Studios and CLAMP.**

 **Eureka Seven is owned by Funimation Entertainment, Studio Bones, and Dai Sato.**

 **Neon Genesis Evangelion is owned by AEsir Holdings, Gainax and Hideaki Anno**


	4. Episode 3: An Unusual Deal

**Welcome back everybody! So, where we last left off, we found our heroes committing robbery in order to pay off a rent notice. Were they still able to pay it off in time? Well, let's take a look and find out.**

 **Episode 3: An Unusual Deal**

NARRATOR: Welcome back to Animes Unite, I'm your unseen narrator. When we last left our guests they robbed the local bank and managed to make it out alive. Although certain hijinks ensued and at the end, our guest Eureka ended up losing her cool and going on a rampage. What happened afterwards was really complicated and we don't have a lot of time to harp on that, so I'll explain it in quick words and footage. (takes a breath)

(Footage shows the aftermath of the previous episode. Eureka, along with the others in court, followed by the gang paying the damages, Chi getting repaired, and all of them evicted from the house.)

NARRATOR: (quickly) Eureka got arrested for property damage causing the gang to pay $45,000 in damages taking a large chunk of the money they stole away, and they ended up spending the rest to get Chi repaired. With all their money spent, they got evicted from the house. The challenge is not over yet, although the objective has changed, and the new motive now is to get back into the house. (normal) So now that we're all caught up, let's get to today's episode. Change the footage Larry.

BACKGROUND GUY: Got it.

(Fast forwards the footage but ends up coming to a different scene. It shows Eureka from behind, naked and taking a shower.)

NARRATOR: Uh oh, that's not right. Larry change the scene.

BACKGROUND GUY: Hold on.

(Eureka seems to hear this and turns her head around.)

EUREKA: Huh?

(Scene fast forwards again. The scene transitions to a different scene. This time it shows Yukio in his underwear dancing to Kesha's TiK ToK)

NARRATOR: What the…Larry!

BACKGROUND GUY: I'm sorry, let me try it again.

(Scene fast forwards. The scene transitions to Edward in his room wearing a miniskirt and looking in a mirror.)

EDWARD: I sure look dead sexy in a miniskirt.

NARRATOR: Oh Jesus Christ! LARRY!

BACKGROUND GUY: I'm sorry, I can't get this to work properly.

NARRATOR: Well start making it work! Seriously where do you get all this footage?

BACKGROUND GUY: I put some hidden cameras in the house, thought it might boost the visual appeal.

NARRATOR: Pervert.

(All of a sudden the doors to the room burst open revealing Eureka, Yukio, and Edward all looking completely angry.)

NARRATOR: Sorry Larry, but you deserve it.

(As the three of them then run towards the camera in rage the scene suddenly cuts. It then transitions to the bottom of a bridge outside. It's nighttime outside. We see everyone crowded around a camp fire all looking tired and hungry. Their clothes are all disheveled and their faces look gaunt.)

YUKIO: I can't believe it's already been three months since we got kicked out of the house.

YOKO: Stop being dramatic it's only been a week.

YUKIO: It feels like longer.

RIN: (playing a harmonica) Time goes very slow. (keeps playing his harmonica.)

ORIHIME: Where are Ichigo and Edward with the food? I'm fucking starving!

RUKIA: They'll be here.

RENTON: That begs the question. We're out under a bridge in the inner city. What kind of animals are we gonna be able to kill out here?

CHI: Well the area here is surrounded by all kinds of wildlife so there is a high percentage that-

HARUHI: Chi, you don't have to explain it to us.

(Ichigo and Edward enter the scene carrying a deer.)

ICHIGO: Hey guys, we brought dinner.

RIN: Here hand it over and I'll cook it up.

LELOUCH: (lies down on the ground) We managed to get something bigger than the rabbits and bugs. Thank God.

NARRATOR: As you all can see, they aren't in the best shape. They've been outside for only a week and this is the result.

RIN: Gee thanks narrator, we really needed you to state the fucking obvious.

NARRATOR: I'm just doing my job.

(Cuts to everyone sitting down around the camp fire eating the deer)

SIMON: Rin, I gotta say, if there's one thing you're great at, it is cooking.

RIN: (cockily) Well, thank you very much.

YOKO: Let's be honest, if it wasn't for him then we'd all be dead by this point. Here's to you Rin.

YUKIO: You know Rin, remember when we used to be street urchins stealing anything we could before and after we did Blue Exorcist?

RIN: Yeah, good times.

RUKIA: What happened to all the money you guys earned?

RIN: Some douchebag financial accountant we hired spent it all on gambling, and then he fled the country before we could track him down. If we ever find that son of a bitch, I swear I'll nail him to a cross.

SHINJI: So basically, what happened to Rocky's family in Rocky V.

RIN: Shut up Shinji.

RENTON: I miss the house.

LELOUCH: All the comfy beds, the awesome shower, my Xbox One, they can keep it, I'm a PS4 guy! (starts crying)

HARUHI: Well I guess you can blame a certain blue-haired alien chick for that.

EUREKA: (offended) WHAT?! Shut up Haruhi! You can't blame this all on me!

RIN: Yeah you know what, we can blame it on you! If you hadn't gone crazy and bulldozed half the city, we would've payed off that rent notice!

EUREKA: Well you guys nearly burned down the kitchen, damaged Chi, and left the smoke bombs in the damn house!

HARUHI: No, you went berserk because you got smacked in the face with a rake that Shinji left in the driveway!

EUREKA: (sigh) Okay fine, I fucked up. Can we please just leave it at that?

YOKO: Eureka, I respect the fact that you have a temper. But why do you have to lose it over everything? You realize how destructive you can get, don't you?

EUREKA: You wouldn't understand Yoko, it runs in the family.

ORIHIME: Wait, wait, wait. You…have a family?

EUREKA: Of course I do!

ORIHIME: Well I do recall in your series that you were born from some "magic alien slime mirror thing" in a mine along with the Nirvash ship. And then during the second season you got sucked back into it and they had to call a priest to get it off of you.

EUREKA: That stuff was called Scub Coral and no, that did not really happen. I came out of a VaJJ like everybody else does.

ORIHIME: (jokingly) A mirror's VaJJ?

EUREKA: No! You know what, please just shut up! The point is I have a family, so drop it!

RENTON: Yeah let's stop. (whispers to Edward) She doesn't like talking about her family.

EDWARD: Daddy issues?

RENTON: I said don't talk about it!

EDWARD: Okay I was just curious.

ICHIGO: Honestly, I think the best course of action now is to find a way to get back into the house. Luckily, we still have our jobs from before.

RUKIA: But that doesn't matter, we still won't make it to the right price range for months. No matter how hard we try.

SIMON: Guess we'll just have to take it as it goes.

LELOUCH: (stands up) I'm gonna go for a walk.

RIN: (jokingly) Try not to get scared and piss your pants!

LELOUCH: (irritated) Yeah, yeah very funny!

SIMON: By the way, you watched Rocky V Shinji?

SHINJI: Hey, somebody had to.

(Lelouch walks down the streets of the city at night. He walks looking completely tired and ragged. After a while he sits down by an apartment building. He takes a sigh)

LELOUCH: (tiredly) I don't understand why we have to go through stuff like this already. We were promised to have a comfortable experience together. Oh who am I kidding, this is reality TV after all. Oh shit, I'm starting to sound like Shinji.

FEMALE VOICE: Hello?

LELOUCH: (panics) AGH! Who's there?!

FEMALE VOICE: I'm sorry, I didn't mean to frighten you.

LELOUCH: (in his head) I really got to keep my nerves under control. (speaking) It's alright. I get spooked easily at night, no big deal.

FEMALE VOICE: Oh, I got you.

(The person is revealed to be Yui Harisawa, the singer/guitarist character from the famous music anime K-on. Upon first glance, Lelouch recognizes her)

LELOUCH: Wait a second, I know you. You're Yui Harisawa from K-On, one of the most popular music animes of all time.

YUI: How nice of you to notice. Wait a minute. Aren't you Lelouch the exile prince of Britannia from Code Geass?

LELOUCH: (sexily) The one and only baby.

YUI: (giddy) Oh my gosh, oh my gosh, oh my gosh! This is so exciting, I'm totally fangirling right now! I love your series!

LELOUCH: Well it's a pleasure to meet you too. I think you're a great singer and your band is awesome.

YUI: That's so sweet of you. But, what are you doing outside my apartment building?

LELOUCH: Well, times haven't been so great for me and many other anime characters. We're all part of a reality TV show but we ended up losing the house we were staying in. We had this challenge where we had to pay off the rent for the house and we couldn't do it.

YUI: (empathetic) Oh. I'm sorry to hear that.

LELOUCH: It's alright. We fucked up, so it's not anyone else's problem.

YUI: How much do you need? To pay off the rent.

LELOUCH: Umm, if I remember correctly we had to pay close to 25,000 the last time we did it. Why do you ask?

YUI: Well the band and I are in town shooting a music video. We're looking for extras and if you or your friends are interested, we'd be happy to hire all of you. The management will give you money for it.

LELOUCH: (interested) How much are we talking here?

YUI: Hmm, I'm thinking we may end up giving you around $50,000, totaling up how many of you there are.

LELOUCH: (shocked) Fifty thousand!

YUI: Yup, will that work?

(Lelouch jumps up and grabs Yui's hands)

LELOUCH: (excitedly) THANK YOU, THANK YOU, THANK YOU! YOU'RE THE BEST! THANK YOU! (kisses her hands repeatedly)

YUI: Okay I guess I'll tell everyone else in the band about it. We'll meet tomorrow then to talk about it?

LELOUCH: YES! (calms down) I mean yes, we'll be there.

YUI: Okay then, bye now. (in her head) He's not as sexy as I thought he was. Eh he's fine.

(Yui goes inside the apartment.)

LELOUCH: (waving) Bye bye. (Dances off down the street) I CAN'T BELIEVE IT, THIS IS BADASS! WE'RE TOTALLY IN THE CLEAR! I AM THE MAN!

NARRATOR: Good job Lelouch. But let's see what everyone else thinks of the idea.

(Cuts back to under the bridge where everyone has fallen asleep. Lelouch comes running in ectastic.)

LELOUCH: HELLO EVERYBODY!

(Everyone bolts awake)

ICHIGO: (groggily) Lelouch, why are you yelling, it's the middle of the night.

LELOUCH: The best thing just happened to me!

EDWARD: You got laid?

LELOUCH: That would be awesome but no! I ran into someone on the street and they just happened to recognize me from Code Geass.

SIMON: Okay so you got recognized. What's the big deal?

LELOUCH: I'm getting there. It turns out this person is part of a band who's filming a music video here this week. I told her of our situation and she said she'd be interested having us as extras in the video, she even said she'll get the management to pay us!

SHINJI: No way! That's awesome!

LELOUCH: I know, right?

CHI: I guess being the exiled prince of Britannia comes with its perks.

LELOUCH: (acting cool) Yes it does darling.

ORIHIME: That sounds cool, but what band is it for and who did you meet?

LELOUCH: The person I met was Yui Harisawa from K-on.

HARUHI: (gets excited) YEEESSS! MOE, MOE, MOE, MOE, MOE, MOE, MOE!

(Haruhi gets bonked on the head by Eureka, knocking her out)

YOKO: No way.

EUREKA: Absolutely not.

RUKIA: Nope.

LELOUCH: What! But why?

RENTON: Yeah why not? This could be our chance to finally pass the challenge.

EUREKA: Because it's moe.

YUKIO: So, it's moe. What's the big fucking deal?

EUREKA: What's the big fucking deal? Are you literally asking that four eyes?

YOKO: There is no way we're gonna get involved with a genre that makes sexual dolls out of girls.

CHI: I thought the ecchi genre did that?

RUKIA: Well there's that too.

SIMON: But K-On is a really good show. It's got good music, it's funny, and it's enjoyable. Why do you guys have so much hate towards it? Just because it has a slight aspect to it that you find particularly offensive?

ORIHIME: You say it has good music in it, well when do the main characters ever spend time doing that? No, they spend their time sitting around drinking tea and eating cake. Kind of a waste of time if you ask me.

EUREKA: We also have the four basic stereotypes in each band member. The energetic one, the painfully shy one who's also a tsundere, the quiet rich one, and the retarded one who Lelouch just met tonight.

LELOUCH: Hey! First off, Yui is not retarded, she's a very smart and kind person. Secondly, she offered all of us a job that pays good money. We could be back in the house in no time with this cash.

ICHIGO: How much did they offer exactly?

LELOUCH: She said around $50,000 in total for all of us.

(The girls and guys suddenly go wide eyed in shock at the amount mentioned)

EVERYONE: (gasp)

RENTON: $50,000?! We'll be back in the house in no time.

SIMON: No kidding and we'll have plenty to spare.

RIN: I can spend it all on weed or sukiyaki!

ICHIGO: Rin no. Bad Rin.

(The girls are struggling to resist)

NARRATOR: You know girls, this is a great chance for you. Sometimes you have to look past the things you hate in order to achieve something. I can see you all have bad feelings towards _K-On_.

CHI: I don't.

NARRATOR: Right, sorry Chi. But you still have to realize your situation and try to work with it. It may be the best thing for you all right now.

(The girls still struggle to resist but eventually they can't hold it in anymore.)

GIRLS: OKAY FINE WE'LL DO IT!

(All slump back on the ground)

YOKO: I can't believe we gave in.

ORIHIME: Why couldn't we have more self-control?

RUKIA: We're so pathetic.

EUREKA: I'm so fucking dirty. I feel like a total whore right now.

SHINJI: (smirking) Well now you know how it feels.

EUREKA: Shut up Shinji.

RIN: So Lelouch, when do they want to meet with us?

LELOUCH: Tomorrow, I guess we'll head over to Yui's apartment. It's not that far from here at all.

NARRATOR: Well until then, you better all get some sleep. Good night everyone.

EVERYONE: Good night.

NARRATOR: We'll go to commercial for now and see what happens in the morning.

…

NARRATOR: Welcome back to Animes Unite. Earlier, we've seen how the group has been struggling since the end of the last episode. But it seems there is a small glimmer of hope. Our guest Lelouch happened to run into Yui Harisawa from the hit music series K-On who suggested hiring everyone as extras in her band's newest music video. Right now, they're on the way to meet the band and negotiate a deal. Let's see how that goes.

(Shows all fourteen members walking towards Yui's apartment in the early morning as the narrator speaks)

LELOUCH: Well, this is the place.

RENTON: Hmm, nice apartment.

(Lelouch goes up to the buzzer)

LELOUCH: Hello Yui. Can you buzz all of us in?

FEMALE VOICE: Who is this?

LELOUCH: It's Lelouch vi Britannia from Code Geass. Who's this?

FEMALE VOICE: Are you really Lelouch?

LELOUCH: (annoyed) Yes, I am Lelouch.

FEMALE VOICE: Prove it then. Say a line that only the real Lelouch would know.

ICHIGO: Okay this is kind of annoying.

EDWARD: Do your fangirls always ask for this?

LELOUCH: Pretty much.

FEMALE VOICE: Hello I'm waiting!

LELOUCH: Hold on I'm thinking of something.

(Lelouch ponders for a moment but then his face becomes more menacing.)

LELOUCH: (threateningly) I, Lelouch vi Britannia, command you to open the door!

(Yui shows up at the front door to let them in)

YUI: Hi Lelouch. Sorry about that. Ritsu and the others were in my apartment screwing around. (notices everyone else) Wow, I didn't expect there'd be a whole bunch of you. Well the more the merrier. Come on inside and we'll discuss the plans.

(Everyone walks in)

HARUHI: (in her thoughts) Moe, moe, moe, moe!

EUREKA: I'm not looking forward to this at all.

YOKO: Remember, it's all worth it for the $50,000.

ORIHIME: Out of all the things we could've given ourselves out to. Why did it have to be moe?

RUKIA: Well we could've went with straight up ecchi, or worse…hentai.

(They shudder in fear and perform the Holy Cross. Scene cuts to show Yui opening the door to her apartment. Inside are the other members Ritsu, Mio, and Mugi.)

YUI: Hey everybody. Here they are.

(Everyone waves. All the girls in the band gasp at the sight of the characters. Mugi and Ritsu run up to Rin and Yukio.)

RITSU: The Okumura Brothers from Blue Exorcist! O-M-G you guys are even hotter in person!

RIN: Oh, well thank you.

MUGI: Really, we love you guys so much. You're just so cool!

YUKIO: That's very sweet of you.

(Rin and Yukio look at each other and then smirk intently.)

RIN and YUKIO: (whisper) Harem time.

EUREKA: Well it seems Lelouch isn't the only one without his share of fangirls.

YOKO: Well they are the sons of Satan.

EUREKA: Wait so does that mean fangirls are also Satanists too?

YOKO: (confused) Uh…I…umm…you got me in a box.

EUREKA: I don't even know why I just asked that.

MIO: Well I'm sure you all have some fans too. (Looks at all the girls) Let me see. Eureka, Yoko Littner, Chi, Orihime Inoue, Rukia Kuchiki and Haruhi Suzumiya. (bows) It's a pleasure to meet you all, I must say I really am a fan of your series.

RUKIA: Thank you. You're very kind Mio.

(Haruhi smiles mischievously as she walks towards Mio)

HARUHI: You know Mio. I must admit that you seem like a very appealing person.

MIO: Umm, well thank you Haruhi.

HARUHI: Very appealing in fact...

(Haruhi begins to slowly reach out her hands towards Mio's chest)

HARUHI: (mischievously) I think I may be able to make use of some of those appealing little traits that you have.

(Eureka punches Haruhi in the stomach, shutting her up. Haruhi clutches her stomach and whimpers in pain)

LELOUCH: Anyway, I think now would be the best time to discuss that plan of yours Yui.

YUI: Certainly. Make yourselves comfortable and I'll prepare you some tea.

…

(Scene cuts to a couple minutes later. Rin and Yukio are sitting on the couch with Mugi and Ritsu chatting away, clearly trying to flirt with them.)

YUKIO: (acting cool) So yeah, being an exorcist definitely comes with its perks. Know what I mean?

RITSU: (giggling) Yukio you're so funny.

MUGI: Tell me what happened next Rin?

RIN: Okay. So, we regain consciousness, there's cops everywhere. We see the bulldozer crashed into a florist shop and on fire. We turn and we see Eureka being taken away by police kicking and screaming that she's gonna kill us and then they sedated her. It was kind of exciting when you think about it.

EDWARD: Well they seem to be hitting it off alright with them.

RENTON: Well, that's fangirls for you. They're always all over you. I'm surprised Ed, don't you ever get any fangirls? I mean Fullmetal Alchemist is still a large thing.

EDWARD: Yes, but they always keep pointing out the…minor thing about me that gets on my nerves.

RENTON: Now I understand.

YUI: Do you all like your tea?

LELOUCH: Yes it's very good, thank you.

ORIHIME: I must admit Yui, you don't seem anything like you were on K-On at all. I initially believed you were a total airhead.

YUI: Well of course. It's just a show after all. I was only acting, which I can freely admit I'm not that good at.

YOKO: Really? I must admit, seeing you play the part of the ditzy airheaded character, you sure nailed it.

YUI: Well I'm much more of a musician than an actor. I was studying in music school and I guess I was in the right place at the right time, they picked me up, I auditioned for the show and got the part.

SIMON: Anyways, Yui what exactly do you want us to do for this music video?

YUI: Yes, about that. (puts her tea down) We're doing a music video for our song _Don't Say Lazy_.

CHI: I like that song.

YUI: Thank you. The kind of plot we're going for in this music video is a bunch of concert goers crashing a video shoot and getting to sing with all of us.

ORIHIME: Okay that sounds interesting, but where do we come in?

YUI: I'm getting to that. We'd like to have you play those concert goers. Some of you will get to come up on the stage and dance with us. But we'd also like to have one of you sharing the microphone with Mio. Can any of you sing?

RENTON: I can. I mostly do it for a hobby, but if you need someone I'll definitely do it.

YUI: Okay good we got one.

RIN: Wait though, I can't dance at all.

YUKIO: Neither can I.

SHINJI: I can't either. I mean I can do the disco move but that's it.

YUI: No worries, we'll teach you how to do it in time. But if you really don't feel comfortable doing it, then you can play the part of concert-goers. Another thing though is that the management wants to pull a little stunt to get this noticed on YouTube. Is anybody here good with a camera or taking video?

EUREKA: I could probably do it. What do you need?

YUI: You just need to be in the audience getting video of it, and streaming it on YouTube. Is that easy enough?

EUREKA: Yeah, I can pull that off.

YUI: We'll plan most of this out as we go along. For the time being, I think you guys could use a little time to get better after all that you've been through. You can stay at my place if you'd like.

ICHIGO: Yui, thank you very much for this. I don't know how we could've done it without you guys.

YUI: Don't thank me just yet. We still have a lot of work to do.

NARRATOR: This seems like it's heading in a great direction so far. Let's stay tuned and see how everyone makes it through this. We'll be right back after these messages.

…

NARRATOR: Welcome back to Animes Unite. Last time, we explored the members of the house meeting the members from the musical series K-On, negotiating a deal that'll pay off a major debt that the group owes. It's been several days now since that negotiation, so let's check in and see how everyone is doing.

(Cuts to the desk where each member speaks)

RENTON: Yui, Mio, Mugi and Ritsu have been getting us ready for the past couple of days. Teaching us the dance moves, right choreography, everything.

ICHIGO: It's been fun working on this. It feels like we've managed to get ourselves back into show business after such a long time.

LELOUCH: To get presented with this opportunity that'll potentially save our lives is great. I say God bless Yui and the other members of the K-on group, love them all.

EUREKA: I mostly was one to judge K-On just for being a moe show. Yet after getting to know the members of the show, I guess I can say that I was wrong.

YOKO: They're very kind to us and have given us a great chance to get back to where we need to go. I gotta admit that I was very biased to them at first, but it seems I really was in the wrong for thinking that way.

NARRATOR: Well I guess things are going quite well now. So let's get to the big day, the music video shoot.

(Cuts to everyone on the lot at the studio where the video will be shot)

EDWARD: Nice day.

SHINJI: Yeah, not too humid.

RUKIA: It's almost 10:30, shouldn't they be here by now?

ICHIGO: They'll be on their way soon, don't worry.

YUI: Hi everyone! Good morning!

(Yui and the rest of the band are on the lot all dressed up in their Don't Say Lazy outfits getting ready to shoot the video. Right next to them is an older man with a mustache.)

EVERYONE: Good morning.

YUI: This is our director for the shoot. Just listen to him and he'll give you all the details you need.

DIRECTOR: So the first shot is obviously easy. We're gonna just show you guys sneaking into the back of the studio here. Think you can all do that?

EVERYONE: (nods)

DIRECTOR: (smiles) Okay good, we'll get this done in no time at all.

RIN: This is gonna take probably ten takes.

YUKIO: What makes you think that?

RIN: I know how this usually works. The director promises it'll go quickly and then before you know it…

(20 seconds later)

RIN: Wow that was quicker than I thought it would be.

DIRECTOR: See, took no time at all. Now we have two groups. Concert goers and stage extras. The ones who are concert goers, that being Ichigo, Lelouch, Eureka, Orihime, Rin, Yukio and Shinji will go with the audience, and Eureka remember you're live streaming this on YouTube, so make sure to have the camera on your phone ready to record.

EUREKA: (pulls out her phone) Got it.

DIRECTOR: The stage extras, that being Renton, Edward, Haruhi, Chi, Yoko, Simon, and Rukia will follow the band into the door and get dressed. Once you're done with that, we'll be ready to shoot the video. Come along with me.

(Cuts to the stage extras all dressed in clothing similar in style to the Don't Say Lazy costumes. It looks kind of awkward)

YOKO: Hmm, I don't feel comfortable wearing this kind of stuff.

SIMON: Yeah it's way too…umm...

CHI: I don't mind it at all.

RENTON: Don't you guys have anything that's not so…umm…flashy.

YUI: Sorry, but that's all that we got. You guys look great though.

EDWARD: (awkwardly) Yeah it sure looks great.

HARUHI: I don't see what the problem is, I think they look great. (does a couple poses) It shows off my physique very well.

RUKIA: (embarrassed) I don't really feel too confident wearing this.

DIRECTOR: Alright everyone, in two minutes you'll be heading out. Stay relaxed because pretty soon, the stage belongs to all of you.

RENTON: (confidently) Alright let's do this. (turns to everyone) You guys all ready?

EVERYONE: Yeah!

(Everyone turns to see that Rukia is as stiff as a board)

CHI: Rukia?

RUKIA: I forgot what words are.

SIMON: What?!

RUKIA (begins to panic) I can't do it! There's so many cameras out there I can't stand it! Oh my God, Oh my God, Oh my God! (begins shaking uncontrollably)

HARUHI: Oh Christ I forgot! Rukia has a huge fear of being in front of a camera. The only way it can work is if the cameras are hidden.

EDWARD: Rukia you have to do this. It's the only way we'll be able to get back into the house.

RUKIA: (panicking) No I can't do it! I'm too scared! They'll all laugh at me!

YOKO: Damn it, now what are we gonna do? Should we just go on without her?

DIRECTOR: I'm afraid not, some of your pay will get deducted if there's one person missing.

SIMON: Well we have to get her out there some way. But what else can we do?

RENTON: What is there that can snap her out of this? (gasps in realization) I got it! (puts his hands on Rukia's shoulders) Rukia listen to me. You don't have to do this for us.

RUKIA: (nervously) I don't?

RENTON: No, don't do this for us. Do it for Chappy.

RUKIA: Chappy?

RENTON: Yes, do it for Chappy the Rabbit.

(Rukia's eye light up at the mention. The camera suddenly zooms in to her eye, going inside her mind)

NARRATOR: Wait, what the hell? John, are you causing this?

BACKGROUND GUY: No way. This is all happening on its own.

(The camera goes keeps going. We see Rukia in a field surrounded by a bunch of fluffy rabbits. She becomes so happy and enamored.)

NARRATOR: Okay, so we're inside her mind now. Is this supposed to mean anything? Come on, give me some answers here!

(Camera immediately zooms back out. Rukia's face changes from worried to extremely happy)

RUKIA: (cute high-pitched voice) Chappy…she is just the cutest wittle thing ever! Oh, yes, she is! Yes, she is!

(The now giddy and happy Rukia begins to jump up and down while giggling.)

EDWARD: Well I guess that did it.

YOKO: Now why couldn't we come up with that?

RENTON: I guess I have the charm.

NARRATOR: Yeah, so much that it affected the entire filming of this episode. Seriously, what the hell happened there?

DIRECTOR: Alright everybody you're on. Let's go.

(Everyone takes the stage with Yui, Mio, Mugi and Ritsu. The other seven members are out in the audience cheering them on. Eureka has her cell phone out getting ready to stream the footage.)

AUDIENCE: (cheering)

MIO: You all know this one.

(1…2…3…4…Everyone begins to dance while Renton and Mio share a microphone.)

MIO and RENTON: (singing) Please don't say you are lazy. We all know you're just crazy. Like swans that kick and scream.

RENTON: (singing) They try to stay afloat while they struggle just to make it.

MIO AND RENTON: (singing) People just love to taunt you. Let them say all they want to. The future's bright you see?

MIO: (singing) My instincts let me know when to break so I can take it.

ICHIGO: This is awesome!

RIN: I haven't been to a rock concert since forever.

YUKIO: That's because we've never been to one.

SHINJI: That makes three of us huh?

RIN and YUKIO: Shut up Shinji.

ICHIGO: And damn, Renton can sing!

EUREKA: (recording the video) Yeah, that's one thing he's best at!

RIN and YUKIO: Just shut up and enjoy the show!

MIO: (singing) It's always right to use a shortcut when you need…

RENTON: (singing) I'll spread my wings and blaze a path I can proceed through.

RENTON and MIO: (singing) My nail broke into feathers, I glued it back together

MIO (singing): The first of all achievements in my history.

RENTON: (singing) And to my self-esteem is yearning to find the courage to be burning.

MIO: (singing) I need to love myself or no one will ever want to love me.

RENTON AND MIO: (singing) Please don't say you are lazy. We all know you're so crazy. Hawks hide their claws and peek.

RENTON: (singing) They're waiting for the moment to strike and keep you in check.

RENTON AND MIO: (singing) In dreams we give our all yet. In truth we're off the wall and. My pitch falls out of sync.

MIO: (singing) I'm learning all the way, so one day I will be perfect.

(The music plays for a couple more seconds until it finally ends. The audience applauds thunderously at the show.)

DIRECTOR: And cut! That's a wrap everybody!

(Renton and Mio share a hug on the stage. Everyone in the audience gives a thumbs up. Everyone on the stage give a large bow to the applauding audience.)

(The scene cuts to a week later. Shows the house outside)

NARRATOR: Following those events, the members of the house got the rent notice paid off and are now back in the house once again. Let's see how they've managed since then.

RIN: (plops down on the couch) Ohhhh I fucking love my couch.

(Rin, Simon, Ichigo, Yoko, Eureka and Renton are in the living room)

ICHIGO: Yup, it sure is good to be back.

EUREKA: Hey guys. The video I streamed on YouTube. Five million views already!

RENTON: Sweet. I guess you girls all learned a valuable lesson.

YOKO: And what's that?

SIMON: That just because you hate something, you may still need to do it either way.

(Yoko and Eureka stare at each other and then think for a moment.)

YOKO and EUREKA: (shrug) Ehhhh. Sort of.

EUREKA: Moe is still a bullshit trope.

YOKO: Up high sister.

(Two share a high five.)

NARRATOR: Good job pointing out the moral there Simon.

SIMON: Thanks Narrator.

ICHIGO: (flipping through the channels, comes across a news report) Hey look, they're talking about us on TV right now.

(All gather around the TV)

RENTON: Turn it up.

NEWSCASTER: Last week, the all-girl band from the popular anime series K-On shot their recent music video for their hit song Don't Say Lazy. The video shows several bystanders coming in to sing along with them, especially Eureka Seven's Renton Thurston, who shared lead vocals with the band's bassist and singer Mio Akiyama.

RENTON: (cockily) Well it seems I'm getting noticed now.

RIN: I still can't believe you're a singer.

RENTON: Yeah, I even have a single on Spotify.

(Renton holds up his phone. It shows his single, with him sitting on the edge of a blue lake with a look of contemplation in his eyes.)

RENTON: I call it _Azul Amor_.

RIN: What does that mean?

RENTON: I don't know, someone suggested I name it that.

ICHIGO: Oh I know that phrase, it means "blue love" in Spanish.

(Eureka gives an embarrassed Renton a "really?" look)

RENTON: Oops. (in his head) Never ask Holland for advice on how to name your single.

NEWSCASTER: However, the band themselves have stated that these bystanders joining in was not part of the video itself. They claim that these bystanders had actually crashed their music video.

EVERYONE: WHAT?!

MIO: (on TV) I don't understand why they would do this, and I find it presumptuous that some random bystanders decided to just crash our shoot. It's very unprofessional.

RIN: I can't believe it. They gave us a job and now they're trying to make us look like the bad guys?! What a load of shit!

SIMON: Yeah you said it Rin.

YOKO: Well that's celebrities for you.

ICHIGO: But let's look on the bright side. We got paid and now we're back in this awesome house again.

(The camera turns to Eureka who's enraged again.)

EUREKA: (seething) Stuck up little moe bitch. I'm gonna go give her a nice little talking to. (stands up. Renton goes after her.)

RENTON: (puts hand on shoulder) Wait a minute Eureka. She's not worth all that trouble, come on.

EUREKA: (slaps hand away) I don't give a shit. If she's going to go out of her way to insult us like that, there's no way I'm going to take it lying down.

RENTON: But Eureka!

EUREKA: By the time I'm done with her, she won't be able to play bass without-

(Eureka nearly reaches the door but something causes her to stop unexpectedly.)

SIMON: Eureka?

EUREKA: …

RIN: Eureka, are you alright?

(Eureka turns around and is all dizzy and wobbly with a goofy smile on her face.)

EUREKA: (dizzy) You want to know something? Cory in the House is the best anime ever (giggles).

(She passes out, it's revealed that she got shot with a tranquilizer dart.)

ICHIGO: Who the hell?

(They all turn to Yoko, who is revealed to be the one carrying the darts)

YOKO: I figured I'd need to keep track of her if she goes off like that again. The SWAT team let me have these. At the same time though, I'm gonna give our little friend Mio a nice message.

(Goes over to the open window and shoots another dart. It finds its way to Mio who's talking to the news reporter)

MIO: I think that it's… (get shot and then gets dizzy) That's it's amazing how screwed up our economy is. (Passes out)

(Renton, Ichigo, Simon, and Rin look on with shock)

YOKO: You guys have any questions?

GUYS: Nope.

YOKO: Good. It's probably better not to ask.

NARRATOR: More words of wisdom Yoko. Well that's all we have for today. Join in next time as we see what new situation the group get themselves in. I'm your unseen narrator and this has been the third episode of Animes Unite, we'll see you all next time.

 **That was fun.**

 **I should say right now that I hold no bad feelings towards the show K-on! In fact, It's not a bad show at all, and I feel it has some good things, especially since it's a Kyoto Animation production, a company I personally put at Number 2 of my favorite anime production companies right behind Ufotable.**

 **I admit I think it does have certain flaws to it, but like I said I don't hate it at all, in fact I even like a ton of the music from the show.**

 **This chapter was probably the quickest to get done when I first started writing it, but it required a ton of edits when I went back to it after a while. Just goes to show that everything will look good when you first write it, then later ends up looking bad after a while.**

 **Things have been going well at school as of right now and I'm glad that the online voice acting has started to take off and I'm getting some good stuff. I've heard about Eureka Seven Hi-Evolution being released recently and though I've heard a lot of mixed things, I still want to give it a chance when it comes out on DVD or streams on Funimation, so I'll give it a chance. Also I got the chance to watch Blue Exorcist Kyoto Saga, and it was awesome. Definitely glad this series picked back up after so long.**

 **Anyway, hope you guys enjoyed the chapter, and I'll see you all next time.**

 **I own none of the above characters in the aforementioned series. Each belongs to their respective owners:**

 **Bleach is owned by Viz Media, Tite Kubo and Toei Animation  
**

 **Blue Exorcist is owned by Aniplex of America, A-1 Pictures, Kazue Kato and Tensai Okamura  
**

 **Tenga Toppa Gurren Lagann is owned by Aniplex of America, Gainax, Kazuki Nakashima, and Hiroyuki Imaishi  
**

 **Fullmetal Alchemist is owned by Aniplex of America, Funimation Entertainment, Studio Bones and Hiromu Arakawa  
**

 **Code Geass is owned by Funimation Entertainment, Sunrise,** **Ichirō Ōkouchi,** ** **Gor** **ō Taniguchi, and CLAMP  
****

 **The Melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiya is owned by Funimation Entertainment, Kyoto Animation, and Nagaru Tanigawa**

 **Chobits is owned by Funimation Entertainment, Madhouse Studios and CLAMP.**

 **Eureka Seven is owned by Funimation Entertainment, Studio Bones, and Dai Sato.**

 **Neon Genesis Evangelion is owned by AEsir Holdings, Gainax and Hideaki Anno**


	5. Episode 4: Let's Get Fancy

**Hey everybody. Back again with a new episode, and this one's a big surprise. In this chapter, we get to see a familiar face from one of the many series shown here.**

 **Hope you guys enjoy.**

 **Episode 4: Let's Get Fancy**

(Scene opens outside in the park. It's a beautiful day outside, birds are chirping and the sun is shining bright.)

NARRATOR: Hello and welcome back to Animes Unite. I'm your unseen narrator and here we are on a nice day in the park. It's been a couple of weeks since everyone completed the first challenge and made it back into the house. Since then, they've taken it easy and haven't had many problems. But let's keep an eye out, things may get exciting.

(Eureka is shown in lying under a tree in the park with her eyes closed. She looks relaxed for once.)

EUREKA: (sigh) What a beautiful day. It's so nice that I don't have to deal with anything stressful. No sir, I can just sit under this tree all day and relax.

(Buzzing sound is then heard)

EUREKA: I knew something had to ruin it eventually. (answers her phone) Hello?

RENTON: Hey Eureka. What are you doing?

EUREKA: I'm in the park, just relaxing.

RENTON: That's nice. It sure is a nice day out…

EUREKA: What happened?

RENTON: What do you mean?

EUREKA: (bored tone) Renton, if you're calling me, then obviously, something bad happened at the house and you need my help. I know how this routine works.

RENTON: (defensively) Not all the time, maybe I wanted to call to ask how you were doing or…

EUREKA: Just tell me what happened.

RENTON: Rin got caught in his zipper.

EUREKA: What? How can you even do that?

RENTON: I don't know but he managed it.

(Shows Yukio and Shinji trying to help Rin get unstuck)

YUKIO: Come on Rin hold still!

RIN: I can't, you're hurting me!

SHINJI: No, we're trying to help you!

RIN: Ouch, ouch, OUCH! STOP IT! (bursts into blue flames again)

EUREKA: Just hold on, I'll be home soon and I'll help you guys out. Don't do anything stupid until I get there.

RENTON: Got it. See you soon.

(Eureka hangs up her phone and gets up from her resting spot. She starts walking home.)

EUREKA: (sighs) Sometimes I wonder why I never can get lucky just once in my life. I'm living in a house run by sadists and nobody here will listen to me. Why can't I ever be appreciated or taken seriously by anyone?

NARRATOR: Well sometimes people aren't so lucky aren't they Eureka? God knows, I wouldn't want to deal with my employers, but being a husband and father, you gotta take risks, and it ends up being worth it at the end of the day…sometimes.

EUREKA: Narrator, I have to ask. Wouldn't you get in trouble for insulting the producers like that? I figure they may take offense to your comments.

NARRATOR: Pfft, like they give a crap. All they want me to do is keep narrating this and have you guys go crazy so they can get ratings. They don't care what I do. I think that's one of the perks of my job, the other is I can defend you all from the idiot background guys who try to torment you, and that I can work from home sometimes, other days I have to come to the studio which can suck a lot.

EUREKA: (smiling) Yeah thanks for letting me beat up that creep who recorded me in the shower last episode.

NARRATOR: No problem. Good thing you caught that, I'm pretty sure that would've gone viral on the web. Along with those videos of Yukio and Edward.

EUREKA: Thank Christ.

(Eureka is on her walk home not paying mind to anything around her. She bumps into someone.)

EUREKA: Oh, I'm sorry.

FEMALE VOICE: It's okay, don't worry about it.

EUREKA: (in her thoughts) Wait a second, I know that voice.

(Eureka looks up and it's revealed that she bumped into Anemone, one of the other main characters in Eureka Seven.)

EUREKA: Anemone?!

ANEMONE: Eureka?!

BOTH: Oh my God!

(Cuts to Eureka at the interview table)

EUREKA: Anemone was one of the cast mates on the show that I sort of got along well with most of the time. Still for some reason, she always annoyed the crap out of me. She acts like she's so damn perfect, always bragging about how great her life is and how she gets to do all the best things. It's really irritating!

NARRATOR: Typical Hollywood jerks huh?

EUREKA: Oh you bet.

NARRATOR: Let's see how this meeting goes.

(Cuts back to Eureka and Anemone meeting.)

ANEMONE: Oh my God, I can't believe how long it's been!?

EUREKA: (nervously giggles) Yeah, I can't believe it either.

ANEMONE: And you look so adorable.

(Anemone begins pinching Eureka's cheeks)

EUREKA: (struggling) No…stop…stop it!

ANEMONE: (cutesy voice) Aww look at you. You're such a little cutie.

(Eureka pushes Anemone away from her face)

EUREKA: Anemone! Don't do that!

ANEMONE: Sorry I couldn't help it. Still it's really nice to see you. And on such a nice day too. How have you been?

EUREKA: I've been alright. What about you?

ANEMONE: I'm doing great. Do you still talk to Renton?

EUREKA: Of course, he's my friend after all.

ANEMONE: I've always been surprised that you two never ended up as a couple.

EUREKA: Well you and Dominic didn't either.

ANEMONE: Yeah, but you know what they say, it was all fiction.

EUREKA: That's true. (under her breath) In her case, I'm glad she didn't end up with that douchebag.

NARRATOR: Seriously? Dominic was a douche?

EUREKA: Yup.

(Flashback to the filming of episode 11 of Eureka Seven. Dominic is pissed off at the sound guy. Everyone, including Eureka, Renton and Anemone are standing off to the side looking super uncomfortable.)

DOMINIC: (pissed) IS IT LITERALLY THAT DIFFICULT FOR YOU TO KEEP THE BOOM MIC OUT OF THE SHOT! IS IT THAT HARD DIPSHIT!? WHAT'D YOU DO TO GET THIS JOB, GIVE DONUTS TO THE DIRECTOR!? I'VE NEVER SEEN IDIOCY LIKE YOURS, LITERALLY GO JUMP OFF A CLIFF AND GET A FUCKING JOB AT STARBUCKS, YOU CAN'T RECORD FUCKING SOUND FOR SHIT. (pulls out a flask and guzzles it down.) I'll be in my trailer if you need me. (walks off set.)

DIRECTOR: Okay everybody. I think we should wrap up for today. You can all go home now.

RENTON: (awkwardly) Yeah, I'm gonna go…play some… Kingdom Hearts…on my PlayStation…because you know…it's PlayStation exclusive. (walks offscreen)

EUREKA: (awkwardly) And…I have to…go home…and…feed my cat…Cringles. (walks offscreen)

RENTON: (offscreen) You have a cat named Cringles?

EUREKA: (offscreen) I do now.

(Cuts back.)

NARRATOR: Wow.

EUREKA: But umm, what have you been up to these days?

ANEMONE: (proudly) Oh just everything I could hope for. I live my life to the fullest every single day. I waterski, I travel around the world, I climb mountains, I plant flowers, I eat the most amazing food. Life couldn't be any better!

EUREKA: (in her head) Hmph. God what a fucking show off. I swear if I wasn't trying to avoid making a scene, I'd wreck her ass right here.

ANEMONE: But what about you? What have you been up to lately?

EUREKA: (nervously) I…uh…I'm…I'm on…I'm on reality TV now.

ANEMONE: Oh really?

EUREKA: (nervously) Yeah.

ANEMONE: (teasingly) So you're in the same boat with the Kardashians and The Jersey Shore people, aren't you? I guess it makes sense you'd end up there, considering how hot headed you are.

EUREKA: (offended) Excuse me!? Hot headed!?

ANEMONE: (laughing)

(Eureka starts to get irritated by Anemone's mocking, clenching her fists and gritting her teeth.)

NARRATOR: Now Eureka, let this be a lesson that you should control not just your anger, but also what you-

EUREKA: (angrily) No! For your information, Anemone, I'm not in the same league with those low life scumbags! I am a well dignified and successful millionaire heiress who lives in a large glamorous house with several other popular anime characters!

NARRATOR: Oh no.

ANEMONE: (astonished) Eureka. That's really amazing. I had no idea you made a big name for yourself.

EUREKA: (proudly) Hmph. You better believe it baby.

ANEMONE: You know, now you got me interested. Maybe we should meet for dinner sometime.

EUREKA: (still acting proud) That would sound nice.

ANEMONE: Does tomorrow night sound good?

(Eureka's eyes go extremely wide in shock. She mutters gibberish for a second before she speaks coherently again.)

EUREKA: T-t-t-t-t-tomorrow n-n-n-night?

ANEMONE: Sure, it'll be fun. I'll bring some of my friends along and we can have a nice little get together. That sound alright with you?

EUREKA: Well…I…I uh…I…guess…

ANEMONE: (excited) Fantastic! I'll see you tomorrow cutie

(Anemone gives her cheek a little pinch before running off happily. Eureka stands there motionless.)

NARRATOR: Well…that could've gone better.

(Scene cuts to Renton and Yukio still trying to help Rin get unstuck. Renton's on the phone.)

RENTON: Hey Mom it's Renton. Listen, we have a problem. No, I didn't break something worth 1 grand. Mom listen! How do you get someone unstuck from their zipper? No, I didn't get stuck it was one of my roommates. What do I need? Okay so I need hot water and a towel. What do I have to do with Vaseline?

(Eureka arrives back)

RENTON: Hold on Mom, hey Eureka you're back.

(She passes them without a second glance.)

YUKIO: Hey wait! Where are you going?!

RIN: Come back, I need some help here!

(Eureka walks back and quickly gets Rin unstuck before heading off.)

RIN: Thank you. (suddenly grabs his crotch in pain) Ooooww!

RENTON: (continues to talk on the phone) Don't worry Mom we figured it out. What? No Mom, I'm not gonna be home for dinner next weekend. Wait its Dad's birthday? Fuck I forgot. Sorry, I forgot no foul language. It was just a slip! I'm sorry okay! Okay, I'll try to be there. Yeah. Alright, I love you too. Bye-bye (hangs up.)

(Renton looks over at Rin and Yukio.)

RENTON: Uhh, you know family stuff.

YUKIO: I take your mom is a little willful huh?

RENTON: (shrugs) Kind of.

RIN: (chuckles) Mama's boy.

RENTON: Shut up!

(Eureka eventually reaches her room and plops herself face down on the bed. She screams, but they're muffled by the pillow. Chi peeks her head down from the top bunk.)

CHI: Eureka, are you alright?

EUREKA: (muffled) Hey Chi, no I'm not alright.

(Chi comes down from the top bunk and moves closer to Eureka.)

CHI: What's the matter?

(Yoko, Orihime and Rukia enter the room)

YOKO: Hey everybody, we're back.

CHI: (happily) Hi everyone.

EUREKA: (muffled and despondent) Hi…

RUKIA: Eureka? What's wrong?

(Eureka takes her face out of the pillow)

EUREKA: I fucked up hard today. Really hard.

ORIHIME: Oh boy, did you assault another policeman?

EUREKA: No! I ran into Anemone earlier today on my way back from the park.

YOKO: Anemone? Isn't she one of the main characters from Eureka Seven?

EUREKA: That's her.

ORIHIME: The pink-haired chick who ate jam in a very provocative way and tried to kill you and Renton in that giant eyeball gundam thing?

EUREKA: Mm-hmm. By the way that eyeball gundam was called theEnd.

CHI: What happened?

EUREKA: Well she was going on about stupid crap and then she said something that made me a little angry.

YOKO: Then you beat her up?

EUREKA: No, then I told a stupid lie. She believed it, but now I have to prove it and I don't know what to do.

YOKO: (reassuringly) Well come on it can't be that bad. Hell, it's not like you told her you were a millionaire heiress who owns a large glamorous house or something.

(Eureka glares at her)

YOKO: Oh shit.

EUREKA: (lays on her back) Yeah, now you see my problem.

ORIHIME: Well I hate to be rude but it sounds like you really fucked up… idiot.

EUREKA: (sarcastically) Thank you.

RUKIA: Well maybe we could do something.

YOKO: (gets an idea) I got it. We can make the house look fancy and sophisticated when Anemone comes tomorrow. This house is big enough to pass as a mansion, all we need to do is add a little glamour to it and voilà, instant millionaire wet dream.

RUKIA: Oooh that could work.

EUREKA: Yeah sure except for one simple thing. Half the people in the house don't know the meaning of the words manners, etiquette, or fucking courtesy.

ORIHIME: Oh well, we tried.

CHI: Couldn't you teach them Eureka?

EUREKA: Huh?

CHI: Maybe you could show everyone how to be courteous and maybe promise them something in return if they do it properly.

ORIHIME: Or threaten them.

EUREKA: (starts to lighten up) You know what? You're right Chi, I'll teach everybody the meaning of etiquette. They'll know what it means to behave and to have manners. (stands up in confidence) By the time Anemone gets here tomorrow night, this place will be the classiest anime home ever! Watch out Anemone, here I come!

YOKO: Still for someone like Haruhi, she may not be able to behave easily.

RUKIA: Yeah, she's going to grope the guests and act rude to everyone.

CHI: That's Haruhi for you.

EUREKA: Oh, I'll make her behave. (smiles sadistically) Whether she likes it or not.

ORIHIME: (to Yoko and Chi) Does she scare you two sometimes?

YOKO: Kind of.

CHI: Not really.

NARRATOR: We got ourselves a good plan going. But let's see how Eureka manages to execute it.

(Cuts to everyone is gathered in the living room. Eureka is pacing around the room.)

EUREKA: Okay everybody, listen up. My old cast mate Anemone is going to be here tomorrow. I told her that I'm super rich and I own a glamorous house. Of course, that was all a lie.

SHINJI: What were you thinking?

EUREKA: Shut up Shinji. Anyway, she'll be coming tomorrow night for dinner. Ergo, we need to make this house as sophisticated as we possibly can, and we're going to start now.

(Eureka pulls out a bunch of papers)

EUREKA: These papers are listed with instructions that I will give to each of you and you're going to practice all of them. Any questions?

(Renton raises his hand)

EUREKA: Yes Renton?

RENTON: Eureka do you think you'll be able to keep your temper in order for this?

EUREKA: I certainly can. I decided that for the sake of this event, I'm not going to lose my temper at anything or anyone.

RENTON: I'm not sure of that.

EUREKA: Don't believe me, then let's test it out. Go ahead and say anything insulting to me, go right ahead.

RENTON: (nervously) Umm, you're an evil bitch.

EUREKA: (composed) Go on.

RENTON: (nervously) You're as ugly as a horse fucked by a rhino.

EUREKA: (still composed) Do it again, and this time say something that I know will get my attention.

RENTON: Hi _Eureka_ (flinches in fear)

EUREKA: (still composed) See, I can keep it all under control. (In her head) IT'S PRONOUNCED EUREKA!

YOKO: Well at least that's taken care of.

EUREKA: Also, I need to give a couple of shout-outs to certain people here. The first person is Rin.

RIN: (stands up) Yes.

EUREKA: (hands him a slip) I want you to completely follow these instructions.

RIN: I got that.

EUREKA: You must keep your temper in order.

RIN: I can do that.

EUREKA: Be kind to every guest.

RIN: Sure.

EUREKA: Make sure you don't burst into blue flames.

RIN: Mm-hmm.

EUREKA: And you cannot smoke any pot before this event, none at all.

RIN: I can't make that promise. I need to smoke at least one, otherwise I won't make it.

EUREKA: Well I'm sorry, but you're going to have to blow it off for two days.

RIN: (smirks) And what makes you think that I'm going to anyway?

EUREKA: I think this might be able to convince you.

(Eureka holds up a plate of fresh sukiyaki. Rin becomes entranced and his mouth starts watering.)

RIN: Suuuukiiiiiiyaaakiiiiiii…

EUREKA: (teasing) That's right. You'd want to have all this delicious sukiyaki, wouldn't you?

RIN: Uh-huh.

EUREKA: Will you not smoke then?

RIN: No.

EUREKA: Sorry, then you're not getting this. In fact, I know a certain person who would like this more. A Miss Usagi Tsukino, also known as Sailor Moon.

RIN: FUCK THAT MEATBALL HEAD, THAT STUFF IS MINE! (gets on his knees and begs) Give it to me! Come on Eureka, give me the stuff please!

EUREKA: You promise you won't smoke any pot?

RIN: (nods) Yes.

EUREKA: Do you really promise?

RIN: Yes, I swear.

EUREKA: Do you really, really, really, promise?

RIN: YES, I PROMISE! JUST LET ME HAVE IT, PLEASE!

EUREKA: No, you'll get it after this is done. Suck it up demon boy.

RIN: You're so vicious.

(Rin starts crying. Yukio hugs and comforts Rin)

EUREKA: Next person is Orihime.

ORIHIME: Yep.

EUREKA: As much as I support your feminist views, I feel we need to put it away for one night. You cannot make any disparaging comments about men nor negative comments in regards to women with large busts or anything relating to that matter.

ORIHIME: Can I least give a subtle explanation of my views stating that I see women as people who deserve integrity and dignity?

EUREKA: If it's subtle.

ORIHIME: Okay I'll do it. But I won't like it.

EUREKA: Good, next person on the list is Shinji.

SHINJI: Mm-hmm.

EUREKA: I need you to not complain during this. Do not go on about how you're a media whore and remain optimistic and upbeat the whole time.

SHINJI: I have no comprehension of those words.

EUREKA: Just try and be happy. If you need help, I'll get you Prozac or something. Just do not scream about how you're a whore or anything. Do you think you can do that?

SHINJI: Sure, I guess so.

EUREKA: (pats him on the head) Good boy. And last but not least… (with disgust) Haruhi.

HARUHI: (sweetly) Yes.

EUREKA: I need you to lock it up tomorrow night. So listen. You will not grope any of the guests, you will be kind to everyone that you meet, you will not insult or degrade anyone, and especially you will not mention anything about your SOS Brigade or your interest in aliens, shape-shifters, time travelers or espers at all. Do I make myself clear?

HARUHI: (scoffs) Forget it bitch. I am the prideful leader of the SOS Brigade and I will do anything in my power to assure that I receive the most exceeding amount of attention possible. I will not adhere to any…

(Eureka grabs Haruhi by the cheeks and pulls her closer)

EUREKA: (threateningly) Listen carefully Suzumiya. I don't give a flying fuck about what you want. I'm in charge now and you are going to adhere to my rules whether you like it or not. If you decide not to, you'll have a lot of pain coming your way. Not only that, I will dismantle your SOS Brigade, person…by…person. (smiles evilly) Do I make myself clear?

HARUHI: (frightened) Yes.

EUREKA: Yes what?

HARUHI: (frightened) Yes ma'am.

EUREKA: Good.

(Eureka pushes her back onto the floor)

EUREKA: So now that that's covered, let's get to work on practicing these rules. Let's start with Step 1…

(Cuts to several hours later. Everyone is sitting and they all look exhausted. Eureka is standing up)

EUREKA: Let's review. When someone walks into the house, you say…

EVERYONE: Welcome sir/ma'am, pleased to make your acquaintance.

EUREKA: When you eat, make sure to…

EVERYONE: Chew with your mouth closed, use your napkins and utensils, and do not scarf it down.

EUREKA: If a topic is brought into question that you happen to enjoy, then remember to…

EVERYONE: Not dominate the conversation completely.

EUREKA: (happily) Alright, it looks like we've got everything down now! (looks at her watch) Oh it's getting late, well you can all head off to bed now. Tomorrow we still have a lot of planning to do.

(Everyone except for Yoko and Chi go off to bed. The scene cuts to the three of them in the kitchen with Eureka fixing them cups of tea.)

YOKO: Well you must be pretty proud of yourself. You managed to whip them all into shape.

EUREKA: They all have their weaknesses it's easy, if they try to go against me I can use them to my advantage.

CHI: What do we have to do tomorrow Eureka?

EUREKA: Decorate the house, find good clothes to wear, and make sure we have the food cooked. If we can make it through that, then this will be the best party ever.

NARRATOR: And we'll see after this commercial break. This is Animes Unite and we'll be right back after these messages.

…

NARRATOR: Welcome back to Animes Unite. The guests in the house are preparing for a get together with Eureka and Renton's former cast mate Anemone, all the while trying to make the house fancy and sophisticated to keep with Eureka's lie. Let's continue where we left off and see how they all make out today.

(Cuts to everyone all sound asleep in their beds. It's around seven in the morning. Suddenly the loud sound of a trumpet playing the Reveille call wakes everyone up. Some of them fall out of their beds.)

EVERYONE: AAGGH!

(It's shown that Eureka is outside in the hallway playing a trumpet.)

EUREKA: Time to get up everybody! We got a lot of work to do! (continues playing the trumpet)

(Everyone stumbles out of their bedrooms)

LELOUCH: Eureka? Oh, Jesus Christ.

SHINJI: (tiredly) Come on, 5 AM is way too early.

EUREKA: (stops paying the trumpet) It's 7 AM Shinji.

SHINJI: That's still way too early.

ICHIGO: Why are you waking us up anyway? I know Anemone's coming today but I didn't think there'd be so much left to do.

EUREKA: That's where you're wrong. The first order of business is making this house look wealthy and glamorous. We're gonna put up some decorations and clean the place up.

RIN: But it already looks like a mansion to begin with. It's a pretty big fucking house.

EUREKA: Does it look glamorous or clean to you?

RIN: Uhhhhh.

EUREKA: Didn't think so.

(Eureka runs offscreen for a split-second and then comes back wearing an apron and cap and holding a broom.)

EUREKA: Now let's get to work.

EDWARD: Renton, you ever get the feeling your girlfriend is very controlling?

RENTON: First off, she's not my girlfriend. Secondly, she's not controlling at all. She's just a perfectionist.

RIN: Perfectionist my ass. Even Stanley Kubrick wasn't this fucking demanding.

RENTON: (threateningly) You will not take that man's name in vain, he is a filmmaking treasure.

RIN: I will for now Renton, but my collection of Stanley Kubrick inspired jokes will not go untouched.

(Dramatic note)

YUKIO: He doesn't have any.

RIN: Yeah, I don't.

(Next part shows a montage of the house being decorated and cleaned by everyone in the house. After a while, the house is finally looking fancy.)

NARRATOR: Alright everybody. Job well done. The house couldn't look any better.

YUKIO: Phew, well it's nice to see all that hard work finally paid off.

EDWARD: Yeah. You'd think we'd get shown on House Hunters if they saw this place.

RENTON: (smirking) And we owe it all to the girl who told a lie and forcibly made us do it.

(Eureka looks at him with an angry face)

RENTON: (nervous smile) But it was all worth it in the end.

(Eureka smiles and gives him a "boop" on the nose)

EUREKA: Okay, so now that's all out of the way. The next step is to call the catering service, Rin you can handle that.

RIN: (pulls out his cell phone) Got it.

EUREKA: And then all we have to do is get dressed up nice.

ICHIGO: But we don't have any dress clothes.

(pause)

RUKIA: (excitedly) Let's go shopping!

(All the guys groan in response while the girls get excited. Cuts them at the store and then to a montage of them picking out clothes. The guys look bored while the girls are enjoying themselves. Then cuts to them arriving back at the house, all the guys are carrying the clothes.)

LELOUCH: I can't believe how many clothes you girls can buy in one trip! How can you do this?!

ORIHIME: We're girls. And we prefer excessive stuff, although I tend to prefer it less excessive in certain areas. Flat chested pride.

EUREKA and RUKIA: Flat chested pride.

EUREKA: Anyway, let's go upstairs and get changed. They'll be here in a couple hours.

(Cuts to all the guys trying to get their suits on.)

LELOUCH: Been a long time since I had to wear one of these.

EDWARD: You said it.

SIMON: I've never worn something like this in my life. Most of my awesome clothes have me shirtless.

(Rin is struggling to tie his tie)

RIN: Shit, how do you do these damn things again.

YUKIO: Hold on Rin, I'll help you.

(Yukio gets up to help Rin adjust his tie)

SHINJI: I'm pretty sure Anemone's gonna faint when she sees this house.

SIMON: I'm surprised Shinji, you're in a chipper mood today.

SHINJI: I took Prozac early this morning. It makes me feel "really" good.

GUYS: Uhhhhhhhhhhh…

LELOUCH: Let's move on.

ICHIGO: Anyway, I will say Renton, Eureka really did pour her heart and soul into making this party.

RENTON: Of course, when she sets out to do something, she's very dedicated to it.

EDWARD: You seem to have a lot of faith in the love of your life, don't you?

RENTON: (groans) Why do you guys keep saying that? She and I are just best friends, we have no interest in each other.

RIN: (smirking) Then why do you stare at her ass every chance you get?

RENTON: What!? I don't do that!

NARRATOR: Yeah you do Renton. In fact, I'm gonna play a montage of all the times you've stared at Eureka's butt since this show started.

(Shows montage. Eureka is looking around the living room while Renton's playing a hand-held game.)

EUREKA: Hey Renton, do you know where the TV remote went? I can't find it.

RENTON: Huh? I'm not sure, did you check under the couch?

EUREKA: Oh no, I didn't. Thanks.

(Eureka bends down and looks under the sofa while Renton stares at her rear before looking back at his game. Transitions to Eureka in her room, her hair is wet and she's clad in a bath towel. She's bent over a drawer looking for her pajamas.)

EUREKA: Where the hell did I put my tank top and short-shorts?

(Renton walks by the room and stares at her rear again, then walks away. Cuts to Eureka walking down the hallway before looking down at her boots, one of them is untied.)

EUREKA: Damn it, my boot came undone again. (groans) I gotta buy new laces for these stupid things.

(Eureka bends over to tie her boot as Renton comes behind her, he again stares at her rear before walking the other way. Shows other moments before cutting back to the room.)

YUKIO: Busted.

RENTON: (embarrassed and blushing) How did you get those?

NARRATOR: There are camera men here, obviously they'd be able to grab footage of you. Why else do you think it's called reality TV?

RENTON: You guys suck.

SHINJI: Her ass does look nice though.

RENTON: Shut up Shinji.

SHINJI: Am I wrong?

RENTON: No, but shut up. And you better not look at her ass again, you little bitch.

(Cuts to the girls getting ready for the party. All are dressed up rather nice)

EUREKA: (posing in the mirror.) You don't think this dress looks too tight, do you?

YOKO: (putting on her shoes) Not at all Eureka. Believe me girl, you look amazingly sexy.

EUREKA: (smiles) Amazing probably, but sexy I don't think so. You get that honor Yoko.

YOKO: (laughing) What?

EUREKA: I'm saying that your boobs are fucking beautiful.

YOKO: And that's the only thing I have over you?

EUREKA: Yup.

(Pause)

YOKO: I am so sorry.

ORIHIME: (brushing Rukia's hair) So Eureka, are you ready to rub it in your old friend's face.

EUREKA: Mm-hmm. (sits down)

RUKIA: You know, I probably should've asked this but did you two have any kind of feud when working on Eureka Seven?

EUREKA: Not really, that honor goes right to the children.

NARRATOR: No way Eureka, you hated Maurice, Maeter and Linck? Your children?

EUREKA: They were not my children, and thank the Holy Lord Jesus for that. I love kids, but those little brats put me through so much hell. Not only that, they loved Renton a ton.

NARRATOR: Wow, how ironic.

EUREKA: I won't forget that one time.

…

(Flashback shows the inside of the Gekko with Talho in the bathroom at the mirror. Eureka walks in.)

TALHO: Oh, hey Eureka.

EUREKA: Hey Talho.

TALHO: Ready for another day of filming?

EUREKA: (splashes water on her face) Yep, I memorized the script last night, so I'll be fine.

TALHO: By the way, how's your battle of wits with the little rugrats coming?

EUREKA: Ugh, terrible, those little bitches are pulling pranks left and right and I can't stop them. Why do they like Renton more than me? I'm a nice person. I mean sure, I have a temper, but I'm an overall good person

TALHO: Sometimes people dislike others for stupid reasons.

(Eureka goes over to paper towel dispenser.)

EUREKA: Especially stupid reasons. I don't think I can stand another minute having to do a scene with those fuckers.

TALHO: Well just you wait, they'll get what's coming to them, I'm sure of it.

(Eureka is about to pull down the lever to get the paper towels.)

EUREKA: I sure hope so.

(Eureka pulls the lever, the dispenser opens up revealing a pepper spray can underneath which goes off. Pause)

EUREKA: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!

(Cuts to the outside of the bathroom. Eureka runs out with her eyes covered, bumping into the walls. She takes her hands away, revealing her eyes have become bloodshot and puffy.)

EUREKA: (angry) THOSE BRATS! (runs off down the hall.)

(Behind a corner Renton, along with the three kids are laughing at their prank.)

RENTON: (gives kids a high five) Yeah! Good job kids.

MAURICE: She didn't see that coming.

MAETER: Best prank we've ever done.

LINCK: Yeah it was.

TALHO: Ahem. I happen to be standing right here you know.

(Talho is standing right in front of the four of them with a stern look.)

RENTON: Uhhhhhhhh…(point to the kids) They did it! (run offs) I REGRET NOTHING!

…

RUKIA: Wow that must've been painful.

CHI: It's interesting that a pepper spray can could be cleverly hidden inside of a dispenser like that. It must've been some kind of…

ORIHIME: Chi, we really don't need that right now.

YOKO: Still, that's messed up that they'd pull a prank like that, and especially that Renton would want to be involved with it.

EUREKA: Yeah. I didn't get to fuck up those little shitstains but I gave Renton a good beating for that one.

…

(Flashback shows Talho waiting outside a door reading a Versace magazine while Renton screaming can be heard beyond the door, along with punching sounds.)

EUREKA: (enraged) HOW COULD YOU DO THAT TO ME!?

RENTON: I'M SORRY! I DIDN'T MEAN IT!

EUREKA: (enraged) THIS IS FOR THE PEPPER SPRAY IN MY EYES!

RENTON: IT WAS JUST A PRANK, COME ON! (punch) OWW!

EUREKA: (enraged) AND THIS IS FOR SIDING WITH THOSE LITTLE BRATS OF ALL PEOPLE!

RENTON: I JUST DID IT AS A WAY TO HUMOR THEM! NO, MY ARM DOESN'T GO THAT WAY! (snap) AHAHAHA!

TALHO: Hmm, this looks like a nice outfit here. Maybe I'll go buy that next week.

EUREKA: LICK MY BOOTS, YOU LITTLE CHICKENSHIT! LICK MY BOOTS!

RENTON: (whimpers) I'm really sorry.

…

EUREKA: Anyway, Anemone always acted like she was above everyone. It pissed me off having to hear her brag about how great her life was, or constant bullshit like that. Yesterday when I told her I was on reality TV she said that I was in the same league with the Kardashians and Jersey Shore because of how hot-headed I am.

ORIHIME: Jesus.

CHI: That's not very nice.

EUREKA: Damn right it isn't. That's why I came up with that lie. I have no regrets though, because now I get to make her look dumb.

YOKO: No regrets?

EUREKA: No regrets.

RUKIA: Still it seems like you could've just ignored her, then it would've made it better.

EUREKA: I guess so. But it's a lot less satisfying.

NARRATOR: That's what I tried to say to her but she completely ignored it.

EUREKA: Oh shut up Narrator! (stands up) Come on girls, let's get out there and knock them dead!

GIRLS: YEAH!

(The guys are waiting at the bottom of the stairs for the girls.)

EDWARD: Where are they?

(The girls descend from the staircase in the most regal way ever. The guys look on in astonishment.)

EUREKA: Well, how do we look?

RENTON: (blushing) Eureka, you look... You all look amazing!

YOKO: (laughing) Why thank you. You think we'll have Anemone shocked to hell?

RIN: She'll be shocked right to the seventh layer. (phone buzzing) Hold on I need to get this.

(Haruhi stumbles down the stairs clumsily)

HARUHI: Sorry it took so long. I had some trouble getting this dress on properly.

(Haruhi is dressed rather provocatively. Everyone looks on in shock.)

ORIHIME: Haruhi that wasn't the dress we got for you.

HARUHI: Well what's wrong with it? I really like this dress.

YOKO: It's way too revealing. Literally it's sticking to you.

HARUHI: That's the point. Where have you been?

RUKIA: But don't you want to look dignified?

HARUHI: Dignified? Have…have you met me!?

EUREKA: Haruhi go take that off and put on the dress we bought for you.

HARUHI: I don't want to!

EUREKA: (getting irritated) Haruhi, do what I say!

HARUHI: No!

EURELA: I'll give you to the count of three. One

HARUHI: Hmph, don't make me laugh.

EUREKA: Two.

HARUHI: There's no way that you're going to…

EUREKA: Thhhhhhhhhhhh

HARUHI: Okay I'll go. (turns to the stairs)

EUREKA: Thank you.

HARUHI: NOT! (Runs back and grabs Yoko's breasts again.)

YOKO: AAAAAAAAHHH! NO, STOP IT!

(The girls manage to pull Haruhi away from Yoko)

EUREKA: (seething) That's it. I warned you. (cracks her knuckles)

HARUHI: Did you really think I was going to bow to you? I bow to no one, I'm the amazing SOS Brigade leader!

EUREKA: (raises her fists) Well now you're going to be the "deceased" SOS Brigade Leader.

(Rin runs into the room in panic)

RIN: That was the catering service!

ICHIGO: What's wrong?

RIN: They just cancelled our delivery!

EVERYONE: WHAT?!

EUREKA: How could they cancel on us?!

RIN: I have no idea! They just called me and told me they couldn't do it!

EUREKA: (stressed out) Oh my God, I can't believe this is happening. Haruhi's being her usual bitchy self, and the catering cancelled on us. What's next?!

SHINJI: The Prozac just were off. I feel like a whore again.

EUREKA: NOOOOO! WHAT AM I GONNA DO?!

(Eureka puts her hands on the sides of her head and begins shaking back and forth in panic. Renton then puts his hand on her shoulder.)

RENTON: Eureka calm down. I got an idea, why don't you find Anemone and stall her for as long as you can. We can try to work something out.

EUREKA: What can you do?!

RENTON: I don't know, we'll improvise. Just try and find her.

EUREKA: Alright I'll try.

(She goes to the door and walks outside)

LELOUCH: So now what do we do?

RIN: Wanna get high?

EVERYONE: NO!

RIN: I'm just kidding. For my sukiyaki, I'll resist the urge.

(Eureka is outside panting from all the stress. She manages to collect herself.)

EUREKA: Okay, keep it together Eureka. You'll just go find Anemone and keep her occupied for a couple of minutes. Not too hard, right?

ANEMONE: What's not too hard?

EUREKA: Huh?

(Anemone, in an evening dress, and her guests are right in front of Eureka)

EUREKA: (terrified) ANEMONE YOU'RE HERE!

ANEMONE: Hi Eureka. Wow you're looking really nice tonight. Oh, these are my friends, and yes, we're finally here. Took us a while to find it though.

ANEMONE'S FRIENDS: Hello.

EUREKA: (trying to smile) Yeeeaaaaah. Nice to see you all.

ANEMONE: This must be the place. I must say it looks very nice on the outside. Can we come in?

EUREKA: (frantically) Oh well umm… Wouldn't you rather stay outside for a little bit?! I mean I wanted to get a chance to talk with you for a little bit, considering how long it's been since we've seen each other.

ANEMONE: Well I think it'd be better if we talk inside. It's a little chilly out you know.

(Eureka tries to stall Anemone as she walks closer towards the house.)

EUREKA: (frantically) Oh right I get it. But I'll let you know it's chillier on the inside then on the outside. We tend to usually keep it cold in the house because you know, the cold doesn't bother us. We're also still getting set up for dinner so the place isn't all that tidy. Also, did you know that an hourglass has more moving parts than a wristwatch does, that the longest time between two twins born is 87 days, and in the United Kingdom, it's illegal to eat mince pies during Christmas? Very interesting facts, right? Right?! RIGHT?!

(They all walk inside)

ANEMONE: Not all that tidy?! It looks great!

EUREKA: (in her head) Where is everybody?

ANEMONE: Eureka, you've really outdone yourself. This house is gorgeous.

EUREKA: Oh uhh, thank you.

(Everyone suddenly appears, minus Haruhi and Shinji.)

ANEMONE: Oh my God. All the characters from Fullmetal Alchemist, Blue Exorcist, Chobits, Tengen Toppa Gurren Lagann, Evangelion, Code Geass, Bleach! This is so amazing! You share a home with so many popular anime characters?! I am so jealous of you right now!

EUREKA: (starts to calm down) I know, I'm very surprised of it myself.

YUKIO: Welcome everybody to our home. I must say it is very nice to meet you (takes a bow)

RIN: Pleased to make your…

(Rin sees Anemone for the first time. A harmonious angelic choir is heard in the background and sparkles are shown everywhere. Rin smiles brightly and sees an even more beautiful version of Anemone in front of him. It then cuts revealing Rin smiling, drooling and speaking gibberish.)

YUKIO: Rin!

RIN: (snaps out of trance) Oh! Right! Pleased to make your acquaintance. (in his head) I think I'm in love.

RENTON: Hello Anemone, it's great to see you again.

LELOUCH: Will everyone please come this way. We'll be serving dinner very soon.

(All of the guests walk into the dining room.)

EUREKA: How did you guys do this all so quickly?

SIMON: It was easy. We just improvised.

EUREKA: But where are Haruhi and Shinji?

ICHIGO: We took care of them.

(Shows Haruhi and Shinji being knocked out by the other members. While unconscious they drag them to the basement, throw them down, and lock the door. Cuts back to the group.)

EDWARD: You don't have to worry, they'll be out for a long time. That takes care of one problem.

EUREKA: But what about the catering problem?

RIN: Don't worry, I decided to get a meal cooked up for everyone. You remember Ukobach?

EUREKA: Yeah, he's that little spirit chef from your series.

RIN: He's helping me make it right now, with his help we'll get it done in no time.

RENTON: Come on Eureka. Let's go inside and meet everyone.

(Renton takes Eureka's hand and leads her into the dining room.)

EUREKA: (in her head) I can't believe it, all the problems got taken care of so fast. (smiles) I may just actually pull this off.

LELOUCH: By the way Rin, what just happened with you a second ago.

RIN: (becomes lovestruck again) I just saw an angel right before me. And she was calling my name. beckoning me to join her in Paradise.

YUKIO: Wait, you saw Mom?

RIN: NO! I was talking about that beautiful angel with the pink-hair that just went into the kitchen.

LELOUCH: Rin, you have no shot. Just forget about it.

RIN: (smirks) Oh we'll see about that.

(They all head to the dining room and take a seat at the table. Eureka is sitting right next to Anemone. Rin enters the room from the kitchen carrying the meal.)

RIN: (enthusiastically) Everybody, dinner is served.

(Scene changes to everyone eating the meal and speaking to each other, all the while Eureka is speaking with Anemone.)

ANEMONE: You know, I did hear that you guys were in the news recently. You were in the K-On group's music video, right?

EUREKA: That's right we were. I streamed it on YouTube.

ANEMONE: Is it true that you guys actually crashed it like they said on the news?

EUREKA: No that was all some publicity stunt that the band made. It's a very presumptuous move if you ask me.

ANEMONE: Yes it is. But, I should say Eureka I really am impressed. You get to live with the most popular characters and you're a millionaire. How did you achieve it?

EUREKA: (trying to make it up) I don't know, I guess I just got lucky is all. I did struggle a little after Eureka Seven ended.

ANEMONE: Yeah a lot of people did struggle. Not to mention, with that new series out Eureka Seven AO, the franchise is getting a ton of hate.

EUREKA: Did you see it by any chance? Renton and I were thinking of watching it sometime.

ANEMONE: I did, it's honestly not that bad. It's mediocre, but it could've been way worse I'll be honest. You should check it out sometime.

EUREKA: I will. But Anemone, I have to thank you for coming, it was very nice to see you again after so long.

ANEMONE: (smiles) Yeah, it's been really nice to see you too Eureka.

EUREKA: (in her thoughts) So far so good, she totally thinks I'm a millionaire. I got her right where I want her.

(Cuts to Haruhi and Shinji waking up in the basement.)

HARUHI: (groans) Uhhhhh…Ow, what hit me? It feels like someone implanted rocks in my brain.

SHINJI: Mine too, what happened?

HARUHI: I remember. I yelled at Eureka that I wasn't going to abide by her rules, then Rin said the catering service cancelled. After that I started speaking about the SOS Brigade again, and everything went black.

SHINJI: I remember now. They knocked you out Haruhi, and by the way my head's feeling it seems they did it to me too.

HARUHI: But where are we now?

SHINJI: It's way too dark I can't tell. Hold on, let me get my phone out.

(Shinji takes his phone out and lights the room)

SHINJI: Hmm, looks like we're in the basement.

HARUHI: I should've known they'd throw us down here. Well, let's try and get out of here.

SHINJI: How? There's no lights anywhere and even if we try, they probably locked us down here.

HARUHI: Never doubt the leader of the SOS Brigade Shinji. I always know what to do.

SHINJI: (groans) Retard.

HARUHI: Use the light from your phone. We need to find a power box or something.

(Looking around the room, they manage to find the box.)

SHINJI: Found it. (opens it up) Damn it, there's too many switches.

HARUHI: Well pick one!

SHINJI: Which one?

HARUHI: I don't know, just pick one! I don't care!

SHINJI: (choosing a switch) Eeny, meeny, miny, moe (pulls a random switch).

(All the lights in the house go out. Upstairs, the lights go out in the kitchen.)

ICHIGO: What the hell? What just happened?!

RENTON: The lights went out!

SIMON: Must've been a power outage or something.

(Everybody starts gets nervous)

YOKO: Hey everyone. Let's not get flustered these kinds of things happen all the time.

ORIHIME: Come on now, keep it cool, it'll only be for a couple minutes.

LELOUCH: (turns on the light on his cell phone) Don't worry everyone. We'll take care of it in a moment. Just relax.

EUREKA: Anemone, I'm sorry I didn't know this would happen.

ANEMONE: It's no problem, power outages happen.

(Renton, Rin, Edward and Lelouch get up and walk to find the power box.)

EDWARD: You know, it may just be my intuition talking but I don't think this was a power outage at all.

LELOUCH: Well what else could've caused it.

RENTON: (realizing something) Wait, the power box is in the basement, right?

RIN: You don't think that.

ALL: (gasp)

LELOUCH: Now what do we do?

EDWARD: Well we're not letting those loose cannons out that's for sure.

NARRATOR: I think I can help. There's another power box in the garage, just go in there and use that.

LELOUCH: Narrator, did anyone ever tell you how awesome you were?

NARRATOR: No, they haven't. Thank you very much Lelouch.

(The four head into the garage.)

RENTON: I can't find it anywhere.

RIN: Check behind the cabinet over there.

(Ukobach suddenly pops out and hops on Rin's shoulder)

RIN: Huh? Stay low Ukobach, we can't have any of the guests seeing you.

LELOUCH: I found it.

(pulls a switch, all the lights come back on.)

LELOUCH: (jokingly) Let there be light.

(One of Anemone's friends suddenly walks into the garage.)

ANEMONE'S FRIEND: Are you guys alright?

EDWARD: Oh yeah, we managed to get the lights back on.

RENTON: Should be alright from here on in.

(Anemone's Friend notices Ukobach on Rin's shoulder. He immediately panics)

ANEMONE'S FRIEND: WHAT IS THAT THING?!

(Runs and tries to get the thing off of Rin's shoulder.)

RIN: Hey! Stop it, he's harmless!

(The friend grabs a shovel and swats at Ukobach who dodges the attacks quickly)

EDWARD: WHAT ARE YOU DOING?! LEAVE HIM ALONE!

(The four try to restrain Anemone's friend from attacking Ukobach but he shoves them all away. He corners Ukobach and is about to crush him with the shovel. Ukobach becomes enraged and suddenly grows to large size causing everyone to look on in fear. The scene cuts to everyone now in the living room.)

CHI: Do you think they'll be okay?

RUKIA: How bad can it be, they're just turning on a power box.

EUREKA: (in her thoughts) I knew Haruhi and Shinji would fuck this up. I swear when I get my hands on them, I'm going to-

ANEMONE: You alright Eureka?

EUREKA: (snaps out of her thoughts) Yes I'm fine. I feel bad that you had to get caught with us in such lousy timing.

ANEMONE: It's nothing you need to apologize for. Stuff like this happens all the time, right? Besides it's not like anything worse can happen.

(The guys come running in from the garage screaming. Rin jumps up right behind them.)

RIN: TAKE COVER EVERYONE! UKOBACH'S REALLY PISSED OFF!

(Ukobach comes charging in, now the size of a giant.)

EVERYONE: AAAAAAAAAH!

(They all take cover as Ukobach rampages throughout the house, destroying everything in his path.)

YUKIO: We got to stop him!

ICHIGO: But what can we do?!

SIMON: Let's just charge at it!

RENTON: Well I can't think of any other options.

GUYS: CHARGE!

(They charge at Ukobach who easily swats them away.)

LELOUCH: Ugh, okay maybe that wasn't such a smart idea.

(Ukobach continues to rampage as Eureka looks on from her hiding place.)

EUREKA: This can't be happening. This was supposed to be perfect, and now…everything's destroyed. (slowly reaching anger) And…it's all…your…fault. (enraged) YOU BASTARD!

(Eureka jumps out and attacks Ukobach. Despite how much bigger he is, she beats him with incredible strength. Within a couple minutes Ukobach is incapacitated, he slowly shrinks back to small size. Eureka picks him up by his neck and begins throttling him.)

EUREKA: (throttling Ukobach) YOU LITTLE BASTARD! YOU RUINED EVERYTHING! I HATE YOU! I HATE YOU! I HATE YOU! I HATE YOU! I HATE YOU! I HATE YOU! I HATE YOU! I HATE YOU! I HATE YOU! I HATE YOU! I FUCKING HATE YOU!

(Rin pulls Ukobach out of Eureka's hands. She tries to grab him.)

RIN: Come on Eureka knock it off.

EUREKA: NO! HAND HIM OVER! I'LL RIP HIS LITTLE DEMON ASS TO SHREDS!

(Yoko walks in front of Eureka.)

YOKO: SNAP OUT OF IT!

(Yoko slaps her across the face.)

YOKO: So, everything's ruined. Just live with it Eureka. There's nothing you could've done.

(Banging is heard from the basement door)

HARUHI: Hey, can someone let us out!?

SHINJI: Come on guys! It's cold down here!

EDWARD: Hold on I'll get them. (opens the door, Haruhi and Shinji stumble out)

HARUHI and SHINJI: What'd we miss?

(As everyone gets themselves back up. Anemone takes notice of Eureka, standing with her arms crossed and eyes closed. Anemone walks over and puts a hand on her shoulder.)

ANEMONE: Eureka, it's alright. Look I know everything didn't turn out how it was supposed to. But it wasn't your fault, accidents happen.

EUREKA: (sighs) Anemone, I have a confession to make.

ANEMONE: What?

EUREKA: I lied to you. I'm not really a millionaire heiress and this isn't my house. I just live here for a reality TV show. I have to live with these assholes and go through everyday trials. Not even everyday trials, but trials I can't even believe we're doing.

EVERYONE: (looks at each other) Assholes?

ANEMONE: Eureka. Why'd you lie to me?

EUREKA: (heated) Because I wanted to be something for once. Every time I heard you on Eureka Seven it was always how great your life is, and how amazing everything was for you! It makes me sick to my stomach! You get to be perfect while my life sucks, and it just isn't fair! That's why I lied!

ANEMONE: (slightly offended) Perfect? Are you kidding me?! You think that my life is perfect?!

EUREKA: Oh, I know your life is perfect! You get to do everything you want, you get showered with the greatest gifts, how can it not be?! You're a fucking princess!

ANEMONE: (calms down) Eureka, I have a confession too. I never did any of those things at all. I was just trying to be optimistic around you, around everyone. You know what my life really is like now?

EUREKA: What?

ANEMONE: I live in a crack house. And every day I go out and suck dicks for cash. These people around me, I bribed them to come with me and pretend to be my entourage. This dress I'm wearing, I stole from a clearance sale at Boscov's. You think your life sucks, well at least you have a real place to live. Look what I've got.

EUREKA: Is all that true?

ANEMONE: Well for the most part. I don't actually live in a crack house, I live in an abandoned bus out on I-95. And I don't suck dicks, I just flash my panties to passing cars for $20. But everything else was true. You still have a lot more than I do, and you should be thankful for that. I have nothing to look forward to or hope for and there isn't anything I can do about it. So don't say that your life is terrible, you don't know what terrible even feels like.

EUREKA: (silent for a moment) You know what? You're right. Anemone, I'm sorry for everything. I really wasn't in my best mindset when doing this and it was all for nothing. I just went out of my way to try and make you think I was so great, when really I'm just a pathetic wannabe who tried to impress you. Anemone, please forgive me.

ANEMONE: It's okay. I can understand where you were coming from. You did try to put this together and I think you did a great job for the most part. So, are we cool?

EUREKA: Yeah, we're cool.

ANEMONE: Wanna hug?

EUREKA: Sure.

(The two share a hug for a moment.)

EDWARD: I ship it!

(Gets shouldered by Orihime.)

ORIHIME: Don't ruin the moment.

RENTON: You know. Since Anemone doesn't really have a place to go, how about she stays with us? She could become a fifteenth member of the house.

EUREKA: (suddenly perks up) Yeah, you're right. Can she Narrator?

NARRATOR: I don't see why not? But I guess it depends on what the producers have to say…

(Phone rings. This time the ringtone has changed to Safety Dance by Men Without Hats)

NARRATOR: Hold on a second.

LELOUCH: Okay this ringtone I like a lot.

NARRATOR: Hello. Oh really? You'll allow her to. Alright, that sounds great. Thank you. Anemone, I now welcome you as the fifteenth member of the Animes Unite group.

(Everybody in the house cheers in response to it.)

RIN: (excitedly) YES!

(Everyone looks at Rin.)

RIN: (quietly) Sorry.

EURKEA: (innocently) So, seeing what Ukobach did to the house? Does anyone wanna help me clean up?

(Everyone glares at Eureka before walking away.)

EUREKA: Well this was all my stupid fault so I guess this is what I get. (pulls out a broom) Better get to work.

ANEMONE: I'll help you out. After all I live here now. (pulls out her own broom)

EUREKA: (smiles) Anemone, I love you, and I do mean it that way.

ANEMONE: (flattered) Oh you.

(Both smile)

ANEMONE'S FRIENDS: Awww.

(Eureka and Anemone both turn to them)

ANEMONE: What are you all still doing here? Go home. Leave. We don't want you here.

(They all shrug and leave as Eureka and Anemone start cleaning up the house.)

NARRATOR: Well that was one crazy night I must say, but we got a new member of the household which is a plus. I'm your unseen Narrator and this has been Animes Unite, we'll see you next time.

 **Now wasn't that nice? I guess not.**

 **This was another fun chapter to write and I also added a ton of stuff long after I first wrote it. This was the first chapter I wrote that extended another word limit I previously did. I get surprised looking back at my old work and seeing how I initially would only write chapters that were 1,000 words. I guess I've really come a long way since I started.  
**

 **Also we've added the character of Anemone to the group. When first writing, I initially didn't think of including Anemone and just decided to only have Eureka and Renton, but as I wrote this chapter, I thought it would be cool to include her as part of the group and in my opinion it worked out well. Also Rin's attraction to her become a good source of humour I could work off of.**

 **Also before you guys go berserk about the whole Dominic scene, let me just say first that I totally am for the Dominic x Anemone ship. They were a great pair in the series and I still love them together. The idea to ship Rin and Anemone was actually an idea from a friend of mine and I was very nervous about doing it originally. Eventually, I warmed up to the idea and went out with it. Also I do not hate the Maurice, Maeter and Linck (I did in the first couple of episodes but I warmed up to them), I'm just going off a reaction certain other friends had to them.  
**

 **Hope you guys enjoyed and I'll see you all soon.**

 **I own none of the above characters in the aforementioned series. Each belongs to their respective owners:**

 **Bleach is owned by Viz Media, Tite Kubo and Toei Animation  
**

 **Blue Exorcist is owned by Aniplex of America, A-1 Pictures, Kazue Kato and Tensai Okamura  
**

 **Tenga Toppa Gurren Lagann is owned by Aniplex of America, Gainax, Kazuki Nakashima, and Hiroyuki Imaishi  
**

 **Fullmetal Alchemist is owned by Aniplex of America, Funimation Entertainment, Studio Bones and Hiromu Arakawa  
**

 **Code Geass is owned by Funimation Entertainment, Sunrise,** **Ichirō Ōkouchi,** ** **Gor** **ō Taniguchi, and CLAMP  
****

 **The Melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiya is owned by Funimation Entertainment, Kyoto Animation, and Nagaru Tanigawa**

 **Chobits is owned by Funimation Entertainment, Madhouse Studios and CLAMP.**

 **Eureka Seven is owned by Funimation Entertainment, Studio Bones, and Dai Sato.**

 **Neon Genesis Evangelion is owned by AEsir Holdings, Gainax and Hideaki Anno**


	6. Episode 5: Gaming Geeks

**Hello everybody and welcome to the fifth episode of Animes Unite. This chapter took me a whole month to write but was also the most creative one because I got to touch on video games, particularly various popular genres I've seen as a gamer.  
**

 **Chapter 5: Gaming Geeks**

(The episodes opens with the house. Outside it's pouring rain.)

NARRATOR: Welcome back to Animes Unite. Last time, after many hijinks ensued we ended up welcoming a new guest into the house. We welcomed Anemone from the series Eureka Seven and a former cast mate of members Renton Thurston and Eureka. So far, that brings the number of housemates up to fifteen. Let's see how long we make it with that number. But I'm getting ahead of myself, let's continue with the new episode. As we can see from the look of outside, it's not really a nice day to do anything. But let's see how everyone's making out inside, shall we?

(Cuts to the inside of the house where everybody is at their own activities but it is shown they are definitely bored out of their minds. Eureka is eating junk food. Anemone's playing with a paddle ball. Renton's reading a book, revealed to be The Catcher in the Rye. Edward and Simon are playing video games.)

RENTON: (in his head) Hmm, this Holden guy is actually very wise. Maybe society is full of phonies.

EUREKA: (mouth full) Don't forget to hop the turtle Ed.

EDWARD: (holding the controller) It's a Koopa Troopa and I'll hop it after I get this mushroom and kill the Goomba.

EUREKA: You're such a nerd. (eats a chocolate covered banana)

ANEMONE: How can you eat like that and still be so thin?

EUREKA: Assault is my exercise. Also, my metabolism is really fast.

(Rin and Yukio are building a card house. Lelouch is reading a magazine. Shinji is listening to music and sleeping.)

RIN: Are you really this precise about building a card house?

YUKIO: Shh. The process of a card house is delicate and it must be done carefully. (Finishes it perfectly). Alright I got it! (It suddenly collapses)

RIN: (shrugs) Oh well.

YUKIO: What the fuck? Stop falling apart on me you pieces of shit.

(Both start picking up the cards. Yukio notices Rin staring in Anemone's direction again.)

YUKIO: Will you stop doing that please?

RIN: I can't help it, she's just so beautiful.

YUKIO: I don't think she's your type Rin. If you remember, she ate jam in a very uncomfortable and sexual manner.

RIN: I like jam.

YUKIO: (groans)

(Orihime is on her phone. Rukia is playing with a yoyo. Ichigo's on his laptop.)

ORIHIME: I'm posting on my new feminist blog.

ICHIGO: I'm just doing some stuff.

(Chi is downloading new software. Yoko's shining her sniper rifle. Haruhi is sitting there doing absolutely nothing.)

HARUHI: (in her thoughts) God, I'm so bored I can't act eccentric at all. This is why I have the SOS Brigade, to keep some excitement going in my life.

NARRATOR: So as we can see, they're all really bored and having nothing to do.

ICHIGO: Well what do you expect, it's raining outside. What else are we supposed to do?

LELOUCH: So far we've done every single thing that we can think of. There's nothing to do, and we don't have a car so we can't go out at all.

EDWARD: Well the car we used to rob the bank was destroyed by our dear Eureka here.

EUREKA: (about to object but hangs her head in defeat) I'm sorry.

ANEMONE: Hold on. You guys robbed a bank?

EUREKA and RENTON: It's a long story.

ANEMONE: I don't really want to know.

EUREKA and RENTON: Good.

SIMON: We've done every activity imaginable. I mean come on, what the hell else are we supposed to do.

SHINJI: Wallow in boredom maybe?

SIMON: We're already doing that.

SHINJI: I was just trying to be funny.

SIMON: Shut up Shinji.

NARRATOR: Well there has to be something that you guys can do. I think there is one thing you could…Wait, I got it!

EVERYONE: (interested) Yeah.

NARRATOR: No I lost it.

EVERYONE: (disappointed) Awww…

NARRATOR: Sorry guys. Even I got nothing. Man, this sucks.

(Phone rings, this time the ring tone is 867-5309 by Tommy Tutone.)

NARRATOR: Ugh, here we go again.

ANEMONE: His ringtone isn't all too bad. It's better.

What is it this time? Yeah, I know that they're not doing anything, what do you expect them to… Oh, are you sure we can use it? It's totally safe for them. Alright I guess that's a good idea. I'll tell them. Alright goodbye. We've got some good news.

EVERYONE: (interested again) Yes…

NARRATOR: The producers got hold of a new video game system.

RENTON: We're already playing video games though.

NARRATOR: Right but this one is way different. It should be here right about…(door bell rings) now.

(They all go over to the front door and sure enough there's a large package sitting out on the front step. They bring it inside the house and set it on the counter.)

ICHIGO: What's this?

NARRATOR: Boys and girls. I present to you the VirtuaWorld 7500. One of the most expensive and revolutionary video game systems on the market.

(They open the box and pull out the system each equipped with fifteen helmets. They all look on in awe at the system.)

RUKIA: It looks amazing. But what does it do?

NARRATOR: Basically, you put on the helmets and you'll be sent into a virtual reality game where you'll complete challenges.

CHI: Real virtual reality? That's amazing!

ORIHIME: Hold on this isn't going to be like Virtual Boy, is it? If I'm going to play a game that's like virtual reality, I want it to look realistic. I don't want to see it in red and black.

NARRATOR: No definitely not. We're not gonna risk giving everyone seizures.

EUREKA: (whispers to Renton) Did the Virtual Boy really cause that?

RENTON: It sure did. I know because I tried it out for myself.

EUREKA: Seriously?!

RENTON: Yep.

ANEMONE: Geez, I feel bad for you Renton.

HARUHI: Well if you knew it was going to give you a seizure, then why did you risk it?

RENTON: Shut up Haruhi.

SIMON: Another thing, this won't be like Sword Art Online where if we die in the game we die in real life, will it?

YOKO: Oh, Jesus Christ no! I'm out of here!

(Yoko gets up to leave but is stopped)

NARRATOR: No, I'm sure it won't be anything like that. From what we understand, if you end up dying in the level, you'll just be eliminated until the next round. How this is going to work is that we will send you all to different kinds of game settings every round. Unsurprisingly, in each setting you'll have to complete the major objective before you advance to the next round.

ICHIGO: Wait I got a question. How are you guys going to film us when we're inside the virtual world?

NARRATOR: Huh. That is a good question. Hold on, let me ask the producers. (calls the producers) Yeah, I was just wondering. How exactly are we going to film them when they're playing the system? Oh, alright that makes sense. Okay thanks, bye. We're going in with you, the system also comes with an add on that will allow non-players to interact.

(Everyone looks confused)

EVERYONE: (mumbles in confusion)

NARRATOR: I know it's very confusing but somehow, we're going to manage it. So, let's not waste any more time and get to it. Everyone put the helmets on. (Everyone does so, each sitting down in chairs.) Are we all ready to play?

EVERYONE: Yep.

NARRATOR: Alright then let's do this.

(The game system switches on. Everyone is thrust into a virtual simulation surrounded by numbers and codes.)

RENTON: What the…? Where are we?

EDWARD: I have no idea? What the hell is this place?

SIMON: It's just a bunch of numerical codes and stuff.

YUKIO: I don't know why I'm thinking this, but I feel like we just entered The Matrix.

RIN: Oh great that's just what we need. Stuff related to the Wachowskis. As if the Speed Racer adaptation wasn't enough.

LELOUCH: No Jupiter Ascending was where we draw the line.

HARUHI: Hey, I thought those movies were good!

NARRATOR: Actually, the game is processing right now. This is where you all stand before it's ready to be played.

EUREKA: So, this is just a loading screen?

NARRATOR: Pretty much.

ANEMONE: Very cool.

CHI: Narrator, you said earlier that we'll be sent to different gaming sessions. What exactly are they?

NARRATOR: I'm not sure. What I do know is that it includes various styles of gaming so we'll see what happens.

YOKO: I'll definitely look forward to first person shooters. I can nail it in no time.

SIMON: Then why couldn't you beat Modern Warfare 3?

YOKO: Because that game's a piece of shit, duh.

ICHIGO: I personally like RPG stuff like Final Fantasy.

RENTON: Kingdom Hearts is my shit!

RIN: I play Grand Theft Auto.

EUREKA: I've only had experience with Atari, Commodore 64, NES, and old 80's arcade games. I'm kind of old school.

ANEMONE: That's still cool though.

RENTON: Yeah you have the eighties vibe that none of us have.

EDWARD: I like horror/mystery games.

SHINJI: I don't play video games.

(Everyone becomes silent)

HARUHI: (cough) Killjoy.

NARRATOR: Well stay excited because we're about to see. (The simulation begins to rapidly change around them) This is it everybody! Hold on tight!

(Everyone closes their eyes as the simulation reforms around them and transports them into the session. They open their eyes and they find themselves all standing in a jungle surrounded by trees and other kinds of wildlife.)

ORIHIME: Now where are we?

(They all realize their clothes have also changed and they're dressed in army uniforms carrying various weaponry.)

RUKIA: And why are we dressed liked this. (realizes she's also carrying a rifle) And carrying weapons.

LELOUCH: This has to be the first game session. And from the look of it, I'd say this is probably an army style war game or something along those lines.

EDWARD: Seeing that we have weapons, I guess we're just supposed to shoot people or something.

YOKO: (offended) Hey, fighting in an army is not just shooting people. We have to protect everyone from a major threat! That's what being in an army means!

HARUHI: Yoko, this isn't a real army mission. We're just supposed to shoot enemies and that's it. Granted I'd be excited if we could actually fight real enemies in the army.

EUREKA: You know Haruhi, you're beyond crazy, you're certifiably insane.

HARUHI: No, I'm not.

EUREKA: Yes, you are.

HARUHI: No, I'm not.

EUREKA: Yes, you are.

HARUHI: No, I'm not.

EUREKA: Yes, you are.

HARUHI No, I'm not.

EUREKA: Yes, you are.

HARUHI: No, I'm not.

EUREKA: No, you're not.

HARUHI: Yes, I am.

EUREKA: No, you're not.

HARUHI: Yes, I am.

EUREKA: No, you're not.

HARUHI: Yes, I am.

EUREKA: No, you're not.

HARUHI: Yes, I am.

EUREKA: No, you're not.

HARUHI: YES, I AM! I AM COMPLETELY AND CERTIFIABLY INSANE!

(Pause as Eureka smirks and Haruhi looks at the camera with a disappointed look. A lollipop with the word "sucker" appears on her face.)

EUREKA: (winks) Classic Looney Tunes trope, never gets old.

RENTON: There aren't any enemies around us. There's no way that we're going to win if there's nobody here.

(Sudden explosion occurs in the distance)

RENTON: (whiny) Fuck karma. Fuck it to hell.

(Enemy soldiers start entering the area and begin shooting at everyone.)

ICHIGO: TAKE COVER!

(Everyone takes cover at random places as the soldiers keep trying to shoot at them. Lelouch has now become petrified)

LELOUCH: (scared) What are we gonna do, we're gonna die? We're gonna die that's it for me. (starts crying)

SIMON: No we're not! Remember if we get killed we'll be eliminated until the next round.

LELOUCH: But what do we do?!

YUKIO: Isn't it obvious?! We have to fight back!

ORIHIME: We'll have to push forward and shoot as many as we can! I know it seems like suicide but it's the only way.

RUKIA: I'm afraid I have to agree with that!

EDWARD: Alright on three we'll charge them. One…two…three

EVERYONE: CHARGE!

(They all push forward and begin to shoot as many enemy soldiers as they can. They manage to shoot a couple down while a some of them get wounded as well. Several explosions from grenades go off, catching them off guard.)

HARUHI: THEY'VE GOT FUCKING GRENADES!? THAT'S NOT FAIR!

YOKO: SHUT UP AND MOVE HARUHI!

(They keep running for several minutes until most of the soldiers have been taken down and the group have retreated to a safer area of the map. They're all gathered together.)

ICHIGO: Okay, is everyone alright?

EDWARD: I got hit in the arm. I can't believe it, I just got it fixed too.

RENTON: Did anyone else get hurt?

(Some say yes and some say no.)

SIMON: Wait a minute. Where are Rin and Yukio?

(Suddenly crying is heard in the distance. They look over and see Rin has been shot in the chest and is bleeding while being held by Yukio.)

ANEMONE: (covers her mouth) Oh my God.

RIN: (weakly) Yukio, are you there?

YUKIO: (crying) I'm here Rin. I'm here.

RIN: I…I feel…I feel so cold.

YUKIO: Please Rin, stay with me! You're gonna make it! Please stay with me!

(Everyone looks on with sadness, some have tears in their eyes.)

RIN: Yukio…I need…I need you to do something…for me.

YUKIO: What is it Rin?

RIN: Make sure…that all the pot…I have in the room…is smoked right…take care of that.

YUKIO: I promise I will.

YOKO: (sniffling) That was quite beautiful.

RIN: Also…

YUKIO: What?

(Rin looks at Anemone and then back at Yukio.)

RIN: (whisper) Make sure…to tell…Anemone…that I'll always love her…

YUKIO: I don't know if she'll feel the same way, but I promise I'll tell her.

RIN: And one last thing…

YUKIO: What is it Rin? Tell us!

RIN: Yukio…

(Build up as the camera shows everyone's faces waiting for Rin's response.)

RIN: I stole your copy of Highschool DxD and jerked off to it last week. I figured it be best to tell you the truth before I go, because I know I'd feel guilty about it later.

(Pause)

YUKIO: WHAT!? YOU TOUCHED MY PORN, YOU SON OF A BITCH! I'LL KILL YOU! I'LL KILL YOU! (starts beating up Rin)

(Ichigo and Simon run over and pull Yukio off Rin. Rin then takes his last breath and dies in the game before fading away. Pause.)

RENTON: Well…that happened…

YUKIO: When we get back to the real world, I'm going to kick the living shit out of him. Where the hell did he go anyway?

CHI: Remember what the Narrator said? If we get killed in the game, we'll be eliminated until the next round. Rin isn't dead, he's just not in the round anymore.

YUKIO: Oh right. I forgot.

EDWARD: So what do we do now. We killed all of the enemies, didn't we?

NARRATOR: Actually, the real objective is to make it past the time limit. If at least one of you can make it to the end without dying, then you'll advance to the next stage. Right now, you have five and a half minutes to make it.

ORIHIME: But they have explosives and all we have is rifles. They'll kill us in a minute.

RUKIA: Hey! Check it out!

(They all turn and see that Rukia just found a crate)

RUKIA: I found a box of grenades. (Pulls out a bunch of grenades)

ORIHIME: Okay we have a chance.

(More explosions are heard and more soldiers begin to head their way.)

RENTON: No turning back now. (gets his rifle ready) We got to take them out. Let's go!

(The soldiers enter the scene. Everyone charges at them.)

EVERYONE: CHARGE!

(Everyone charges at the soldiers who start firing, Haruhi is the first to get shot down.)

HARUHI: (weakly) Well, I guess I accomplished most of my goals. Wait a minute, I MISSED ONE! (dies and fades away)

(The next couple of scenes show them fighting with each other, shots of soldiers being killed and blown up are all intertwined. Eureka is about to shoot someone when her rifle runs out of ammunition.)

EUREKA: OH FUCK NO! OUT OF AMMO?!

YOKO: MINE IS TOO!

(Bullets go flying towards them as they duck to safety.)

ANEMONE: EUREKA, YOKO, LOOK OUT!

(Anemone and Orihime are running towards them)

EUREKA: GET US OUT OF HERE!

ORIHIME: DON'T WORRY, WE'RE COMING!

(Anemone and Orihime makes it but are ambushed by a grenade which sends both of them flying.)

YOKO: (terrified) Oh Jesus.

EUREKA: (pissed) That's it you bastards. I'm coming after you! (battle cry) AAAAAAAAHHH!

YOKO: EUREKA, DON'T!

(Eureka runs over to one of the soldiers holding up a shield. She breaks down the shield and manages to wound him, but not before getting shanked by another soldier.)

YOKO: EUREKA!

(Yoko retreats from the area, finding Chi and Rukia wounded and then fading away.)

YOKO: I gotta find a way to get the jump on them, maybe I can…

(Gunshot is heard. Yoko looks down and finds she's been shot.)

YOKO: (annoyed) God, damn it. (she fades away).

(Cuts to Yukio, Renton and Lelouch running and trying to fight off enemies.)

LELOUCH: (fearful) AAAAAH! I DON'T WANT TO DIE, I DON'T WANT TO DIE, I DON'T WANT TO DIE!

YUKIO: GET A HOLD OF YOURSELF, WE'RE NOT GONNA DIE!

RENTON: (smiling) DAMN RIGHT! WE'RE GONNA MAKE IT OUT OF THIS ALIVE NO MATTER WHAT!

(Grenade is suddenly thrown in front of them, the scene goes slow motion.)

NARRATOR: Wait what?

RENTON, YUKIO, LELOUCH: (in slow motion) Ohhhhhhhhhhh fuuuuuuuuuuuck…

(Explosion kills all three of them.)

NARRATOR: This show really is getting weird.

(Edward's shooting enemies behind a tree.)

EDWARD: YOU WANNA FIGHT!? LET'S GO MOTHERFUCKERS! (battle cry) AAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHH!

(Sudden grenade gets thrown at him.)

EDWARD: (whining) Why me?

(Grenade explodes, killing him.)

(Ichigo, Simon, and Shinji are fighting a group of soldiers. Ichigo manages to take down the one and is about to finish him off.)

ICHIGO: (smirking) I guess life's a bitch after all isn't it. (suddenly gets shot from behind) Yep, life is definitely a bitch. (fades away)

(Simon's in a fist fight with one of the soldiers while Shinji's shooting his rifle.)

SHINJI: What did I tell you! This is why I hate reality TV!

(Simon takes down the soldier then goes over and slaps Shinji.)

SIMON: BE A MAN SHINJI! STOP BEING A PUSSY FOR ONCE IN YOUR LIFE AND JUST…(gunshot) be…a…man…

(Simon collapses to the ground revealing that he's been shot. The soldier comes towards Shinji who is petrified with fear. In his head, Shinji begins hearing everyone insult him over and over, getting louder and louder.)

SHINJI: (in his head) I…am not…a pussy. (enraged) I'M NOT A PUSSY!

(Runs over to the soldier and attacks him, managing to kill him in only a couple minutes. Shinji stands there panting from the attack before closing his eyes. The scene transitions and everyone has been taken back to the loading screen, including those who died.)

NARRATOR: First round was completed, good job everyone.

ICHIGO: (relieved) We did it, we made it through the first round.

ORIHIME: God, that game was fucking brutal! I can't believe we all died!

EDWARD: I can't believe that Shinji, the whiny bitch, is the one who managed to win the game.

SHINJI: Neither can I.

SIMON: (pats Shinj on the back) I told you, didn't I? Stop being a pussy for once, and it seems like you did. Good job Shinji.

(Shinji smiles and puts his arm around Simon's shoulder)

SHINJI: Gee thanks buddy.

SIMON: Please don't touch me.

YUKIO: Well thanks to the game, I realized where my copy of DxD went! I told you not to touch it!

RIN: I couldn't help it. It's full tits, how could I resist?

LELOUCH: (facepalm) I cannot believe that Satan spawned two incredible shit-for-brains.

SHINJI: Wait, what happened to you guys when you were eliminated? Do you remember anything?

(Cuts to the others surrounded by white, trying to find their way out. Some of them are just floating in the air for no reason.)

RENTON: We got sent to this weird place. It was all white and cold, and there wasn't anything there. It was just nothing.

YOKO: Nothing but white all the way for miles. You'd run but just end up in the same place.

EUREKA: I wish shelves full of weapons would've appeared there, then it really would've been like The Matrix.

ANEMONE: That would've been badass.

NARRATOR: Well you all completed the first round which is good. So, as we can see, each round represents a different gameplay style. The first one we did was a first-person shooter style. Let's see what the next one is. Everybody ready?

RIN: Wait before I go through with this I'd like to be prepared. (pulls out several joints)

NARRATOR: Wait, how'd you get those in to the game Rin?

RIN: I don't know, I just found them in my pocket.

YUKIO: You know I never thought I'd say this, but let me have some of that. I need to make it through this.

LELOUCH: If possible, can I have one too?

EDWARD: And me?

RIN: Who else wants to have some of it?

(Everyone raises their hands. Rin smirks)

RIN: Seems like I created a following.

(Cuts to everyone smoking joints.)

YUKIO: (sigh) Rin, I'm sorry that I thought getting high was a bad idea.

RIN: Well you learn something new every day brother.

EVERYONE: (sigh in relaxation)

NARRATOR: Is everybody ready for the next stage?

EVERYONE: (all high) Uh-huh.

NARRATOR: Here we go.

(Simulation begins to rapidly change again. Characters close their eyes. Upon opening them they find themselves in a futuristic looking town area with other people walking around. They find that they're clothes have changed into clothing seen in most RPG games.)

ICHIGO: (excited) Oh this is fucking rad dude!

SIMON: An RPG style session. I love it.

EUREKA: (doing poses) These clothes don't look half bad either.

HARUHI: Oh my God Eureka, we actually agree on something.

EUREKA: (annoyed) Don't get overexcited Suzumiya.

YOKO: I don't know, these feel kind of restricting when you think about it.

ORIHIME: Well you're usually running around with your tits hanging out so...

YOKO: Shut up! Just because I dress in a bikini top, that doesn't mean I'm a skank!

ANEMONE: Hey can we change the subject? I don't feel like talking about boobs that much. (looks down at her chest in disappointment) Considering I don't really have any.

(Orihime puts her hand on Anemone's shoulder)

ORIHIME: (comforting) Flat chested pride Anemone, flat chested pride.

HARUHI: (in her head) Hmph, what a bunch of hypocrites. They know that tits automatically make you attractive. Luckily, I have some. They're not huge, but they look sexy enough.

RIN: (jumps in) It's okay Anemone. Your bust looks perfect to me.

ANEMONE: (awkwardly) Umm…thank you?

EDWARD: (whisper) Rin, you're not making it any better.

RIN: (whisper) Just let me try to be romantic!

EDWARD: (whisper) There's romantic and then there's creepy. You're acting creepy!

RIN: Anyway, what exactly are you supposed to do in an RPG? I haven't played them before.

CHI: In an RPG game, you're supposed to explore and meet new characters all the while fighting enemies which will guarantee that you'll level up. It is recommended that you usually stock on items, materials and weapons before going into battle.

NARRATOR: The objective that we laid out here is for all of you to explore the game, talk to various characters, and possibly engage in a battle.

YUKIO: Sounds simple enough.

NARRATOR: First thing I recommend is getting your items. Check your status screens to see them.

(All of them open their status screens. They're completely empty. All sigh in disappointment)

LELOUCH: Well, looks like we'll need to make a run for the store.

RENTON: Okay then, how hard can that be?

(Cuts to all of them in the store waiting in an extremely long line. They all look annoyed.)

ICHIGO: (groans) Just like waiting in line for Grand Theft Auto V on opening night.

ORIHIME: I think the line to get this game took less time!

(Cuts back outside where everybody has gathered together, gotten all of their items together.)

EDWARD: Potions, elixirs, ethers, materia, and weapons. Looks like we're all set.

(Shinji's frantically trying to figure out how to equip his items.)

SHINJI: (panicking) Can't figure it out! How do you equip these damn things?!

SIMON: (groans) Just select the item and hit the button that says equip into inventory. It's that simple.

RIN: Well to be fair, I have no idea how materia works.

RENTON: You basically use it to gain abilities or spells that you'll use in battle. It was one of the big parts of Final Fantasy VII.

YUKIO: Seems like someone's had experience.

RENTON: Yep, took me a whole semester of high school to complete it.

EUREKA: Wait, wait, wait. You didn't go to high school dumbass, you're only fourteen.

RENTON: I still beat the game

ANEMONE: Yeah, you probably wasted time doing that. Or maybe you were jerking it to nudes of Tifa all the time. Little pervert.

(Everyone snorts and giggles.)

ORIHIME: Burn.

EUREKA: (raises hand) Up high. (Both share a high five)

RENTON: Ha, you have no real proof. (picture of Tifa falls out of his pocket.) That's not mine. (hastily picks up photo)

ICHIGO: Wait how did that carry over from your real-life self into this video game?

RENTON: I don't know, suspension of disbelief maybe?

LELOUCH: What do we do now? We have all our items right.

YOKO: There's no enemies to fight, I guess we should go out and socialize with people.

HARUHI: There's a bar right down the corner. Why don't we go there?

EVERYONE: (all shrug and say okay.)

(Cuts to the four of them leaving the bar, some of them completely wasted.)

RIN: (drunk) That was the greatest party ever!

EDWARD: (drunk) Yeah tons of hot babes, games, the best liquor, it was awesome!

(Shows all of them in the bar talking with people, playing games, drinking, and partying.)

LELOUCH: WOO-HOO PARTY!

ICHIGO: I guess some of the guys had a little too much to drink tonight.

ORIHIME: Well...

(Orihime is carrying a wasted Rukia on her back.)

ORIHIME: This time I can't really condemn all the guys here.

RUKIA: (giggling) Oh Ichigo, you're so manly. I lo…(starts snoring).

RENTON: This doesn't look good. Okay who here isn't wasted?

CHI: No I didn't drink at all.

SIMON: I had at least four but I'm still fine.

YOKO: I'm alright. I only had two.

SHINJI: I'm good. A little buzzed, but I'm fine.

ANEMONE: Nope. I'm buzzed too.

YUKIO: Me too, only had one.

HARUHI: I AM, YAY!

(Everyone groans)

RENTON: Okay what about Eureka?

(Shows Eureka who is wobbly, dizzy and looking ill.)

YOKO: Eureka?

ANEMONE: Are you feeling alright?

EUREKA: (slurring) I don't…I don't know. I feel really weird.

HARUHI: (mocking) HA! The responsible Eureka is actually drunk! This is hilarious!

YUKIO: Will you shut up Haruhi!? She looks really sick.

(As Haruhi laughs, Eureka starts to look even worse.)

CHI: Eureka? What's wrong?

EUREKA: (slurring) Uhhh…I don't feel so…

(Eureka covers her mouth. Haruhi goes up to her and continues to mock her.)

HARUHI: (cutesy voice) Oh has someone had one too many? Can she not handle a little alcohol?

EUREKA: (muffled) I...I'm gonna...

(Without warning, Eureka vomits all over Haruhi.)

EVERYONE: (screams)

HARUHI: (disgusted) WHAT THE FUCK!?

(Everyone tries to help Eureka as she falls to her knees, Haruhi continues to panic.)

NARRATOR: I think we need to cut for a couple of minutes. Tom cut the show.

(Cuts. Returns as all those who were drunk have sobered up. Eureka is sitting down on a bench with a blanket draped over her shoulders and a cup of water in her hands.)

RENTON: Do you still feel sick?

EUREKA: No, I'm much better now.

ANEMONE: I can't believe you of all people ended up getting wasted. It's just not like you.

EUREKA: Me neither. But that douchebag of a bartender bet me that I couldn't drink twelve martinis without passing out.

(Haruhi is standing off in the corner getting herself cleaned up.)

HARUHI: (angry) And I can't believe that you had to go and fucking blow chunks all over me!

(Eureka just smirks at Haruhi while everyone gives her thumbs up and winks, which she gladly returns. Lelouch then stands up.)

LELOUCH: Well, now all we got to do is find a boss to fight. So where do we go?

YUKIO: Well in most RPG's the enemies will attack you at random. You don't see it coming at all.

RIN: So that means we just have to sit around and wait for them to come to us.

YUKIO: Pretty much.

ICHIGO: Well I guess with all that in mind, we can just sit here until.

(Sudden flashes of light fill the screen as everyone looks on in shock and wonder. The screen suddenly twirls and turns black.)

NARRATOR: Damn that was fast.

(The screen lightens and it's revealed that everyone is on a battlefield area, right under a giant scorpion like monster.)

ICHIGO: Okay that felt way too quick!

SIMON: I guess we have to fight. But how?

ORIHIME: It's like a card game, you need to pull out the attack that'll deal more damage. You can use your basic attacks or magic, whatever works best.

RIN: Well there's no use in just standing here, let's kill this bastard!

(Yukio notices something. Rin's about to attack)

YUKIO: Rin wait, don't attack yet! It has it's…

(Rin charges and makes the first attack dealing damage.)

RIN: Alright I did it! I got the first attack in.

EDWARD: (worriedly) That probably wasn't a good idea.

RIN: Why not?

(The scorpion uses its tail and triggers a beam attack on them that drains a large majority of their HP. Rin's HP drains all the way down.)

RIN: AAAHH! HORRIBLE!

(Rin collapses and is eliminated. A ghost rises from his deceased body and floats up in the air)

RIN: Goodbye everyone.

EDWARD: That's why.

LELOUCH: Is he gonna be Kenny from South Park in this whole game? I'm not opposed to that, but this is the second time that he's died first.

YUKIO: I'll keep an eye on him next time.

SHINJI: Well what good does that to him now?

YUKIO: Shut up Shinji.

YOKO: So we have to attack it when the tail is down. Everybody make sure to keep an eye on the tail at all costs. We won't be able to tell when it goes up.

RUKIA: But our HP is too low. If we attack it can kill us easily.

CHI: This'll help.

(Chi uses a megaelixir which heals everyone in the group.)

EVERYONE: Thank you Chi.

CHI: (happily) You're welcome.

RENTON: Okay, the tail's still down. I'll go next.

(Renton makes an attack that manages to deal much more damage than last time.)

ICHIGO: Nice shot Renton. It's your turn Ed.

EDWARD: Here I go.

(Edward manages to make an even larger attack, dealing more damage.)

EUREKA: I'm next.

(Eureka uses lightning magic to attack)

YOKO: Let's do this.

(Yoko uses a rifle attack on the monster, sending its HP down even more. The next couple of minutes shows each of the members attacking individually.)

LELOUCH: We're close, a couple more hits and we'll be done.

HARUHI: Look's like Shinji's up.

(Shinji is frantically scrolling through his menu trying to select the right attack)

SIMON: Come on you have to choose quickly!

SHINJI: I'm trying! I think this'll do it.

(Shinji makes a move. It turns out his move actually ends up healing the enemy. Everyone looks on with complete shock, and then at Shinji with anger.)

EVERYONE: (angrily) SHINJI YOU IDIOT!

SHINJI: (produces an innocent smile) Oopsies.

(The creature then unleashes a much stronger attack, so strong that it ends up eliminating Chi, Haruhi, Edward, Eureka, Anemone, Shinji, Simon and Yukio.)

RENTON: (terrified) It's official, we are completely fucked! Our health is way low, and we don't have Chi to heal us!

YOKO: We can't be yet! There has to be something we can do!

ICHIGO: Wait a minute! Lelouch use your limit break!

LELOUCH: My what?!

ICHIGO: The amount of power you gain every time you take a hit! Use it on this son of a bitch!

LELOUCH: Okay if you say so.

(Lelouch activates his limit break which causes a powerful aura to glow around him. He then uses his newfound power to land several powerful attacks on the creature ending with a final powerful blow. Once he's done, the creature fades away, defeated.)

LELOUCH: (ectastic) I did it. I did it! I DID IT! HAHAHAHA! I DID IT!

YOKO: Great job Lelouch!

RENTON: You did it!

ICHIGO: WE WON!

NARRATOR: Wow, that was a big battle. I think we'll take a quick commercial break for a while before we come back.

…

(After the six of them celebrate, they're all transported back to the loading screen. All the deceased characters are back where they were.)

SHINJI: (faking optimism) Well this was an eventful level. We got to party, get drunk, and fight a battle. Very fun right?

(Everyone looks at him with obvious anger)

SHINJI: (nervously) Right guys? Right?

NARRATOR: Shinji, it's not gonna work. Just give it up.

SIMON: We started with an action shooter, then a fantasy RPG, what's next?

RENTON: I don't know, but I'm dreading to find out.

ANEMONE: I won't say that I'm excited for the next round.

EUREKA: Me neither.

HARUHI: You guys are such pansies, aren't you excited for the action.

RIN: Considering what we went through I think I'm starting to lose the excitement.

YUKIO: You're the one who attacked the scorpion like an idiot.

RIN: Piss off Yukio.

ORIHIME: I think I know what the next round's gonna be.

RUKIA: What Orihime?

ORIHIME: It may possibly be a-

(They all get transported to the next simulation. They are in a dark office room with only a dim light providing illumination.)

ORIHIME: Survival horror game. Called it.

(Rukia moves closer to Orihime in fear who hugs and comforts her)

RUKIA: I'm feeling kind of scared now.

(Lelouch also goes closer to Orihime in fear)

LELOUCH: I'm starting to get really uncomfortable feelings standing here.

(Orihime pushes Lelouch away)

ORIHIME: Hey! The only men allowed to hug me are those I trust.

EDWARD: What the hell is this place to begin with? An office building or just some random room?

ICHIGO: It's hard to say, this could be part of a bigger picture.

CHI: Indeed. Most survival horror games will allow you to explore certain areas in order to discover clues or elements needed to complete the game. Aside from that there is also the mission to avoid being scared by certain enemies that appear out of nowhere. Many gamers tend to refer to these as…

EVERYONE: Jump scares.

CHI: (smiling) That's right. Good guessing.

NARRATOR: That's pretty much what you're doing this session. You need to find seven creepy drawings, possibly made by a paranoid child, around this area and not get killed by the jump scare which tends to be a tall dude with no face or a giant mechanical bear. If that happens, you start over.

YOKO: Oh great. The last thing I want to encounter today is a bunch of cheap jump scares. Especially after watching Unfriended.

ANEMONE: You saw that movie?

EUREKA: Yep we did.

ANEMONE: How was it?

EUREKA: It sucked.

ORIHIME: Seriously why does some fat guy keep a blender in his bedroom he could conveniently use to kill himself?

ANEMONE: Maybe he's in college and likes mixed drinks. (Eureka looks at her awkwardly) Yeah…that is very stupid.

RENTON: Well there's no use in sitting here all day, why don't we go explore, there's obviously other rooms.

YUKIO: Still need to be aware, I've never seen these kinds of games before so I don't know what to expect, except danger.

RIN: And jump scares galore. Come on, let's get moving. By the way, check your pockets. I found a flashlight in mine, so I figure you all have the same.

(All of them take flashlights out of their pockets.)

SHINJI: Huh, pretty convenient.

(All of them leave the room. Walking through the halls they find out that the place is a shopping mall with various stores, all opened up and abandoned.)

EDWARD: This place looks like complete shit. If I had been in charge, I would've torn this place down in a minute.

LELOUCH: (trying to sound confident) But that's all there is to it. Not really anything else that's scary at all. (Loud sound is heard) AH! What's that!? (Hides behind Ichigo)

SHINJI: Sorry, my phone dropped out of my pocket.

LELOUCH: You're all doing this on purpose!

ORIHIME: No, you're just being a damn wuss. Funny, I thought Shinji was the giant pussy here.

SHINJI: Oh wow, I actually got a compliment.

ORIHIME: Shut up Shinji.

SIMON: Let's stay focused. The narrator said we needed to find seven creepy drawings in order to complete the game. The question is, where do we look first?

RIN: Well this is just a suggestion, but maybe this restaurant here.

(Rin points to a café on the left.)

YUKIO: Well, it could be a good place to look for clues.

(Everyone just shrugs. Cuts to show all of them searching the restaurant for the drawings.)

ICHIGO: Nothing on the tables.

EDWARD: (looks under the seats) Just as I expected nothing there either.

LELOUCH: Guess this whole place is wiped clean.

HARUHI: You know something I've always been curious about. How come in most horror movies there's a paranoid child that has clairvoyant abilities and creates creepy drawings that act as clue to the coming danger?

CHI: It's often used as a traditional aspect in a horror film to outline what will possibly happen, implying that the child is either the villain or a possible psychic trying to protect the main protagonists.

EUREKA: In simple terms, it's a cliché, and it's always going to be overused and banal. That's why they call them clichés.

HARUHI: Well I think it's brilliant.

YOKO: Considering you think Tommy Wiseau is the greatest filmmaker ever, I'm not at all surprised.

ANEMONE: Well to be fair, he kind of is. But in a different way.

RIN: NOOOOOOOOOO!

(Everyone looks up when they hear that Rin is screaming)

YUKIO: It's Rin! He's in the kitchen!

EVERYONE: RIN!

(They all run in to see that Rin is kneeling on the floor completely terrified.)

RIN: (babbling in fear)

YUKIO: (kneels next to his brother) Rin, what's the matter? What's wrong?

RIN: It…it's…it's awful…it's the most horrible thing…I've ever seen.

YUKIO: What is it? Come on, tell us Rin!

(Picks up a candy box full of butters.)

RIN: They said…these were…exotic…exotic butters… (starts to cry) …it's not exotic…it's not even butter…it's…it's margarine. It's margarine! IT'S MARGARINE! MAAAAAAAAAAARGARIIIIIIIIIIIIIIINE! (breaks down crying.)

(Everyone looks at Rin with annoyance, especially Yukio.)

ICHIGO: Really dude? I mean…really?

YUKIO: You…are so…goddamn…STUPID!

RIN: (tearfully) Fuck the cake, it's margarine.

YUKIO: (quietly) So goddamn stupid.

EDWARD: Hey while he was whining about that I managed to find the first clue. Check it out.

(They all gather around, looking at the first creepy drawing.)

SHINJI: One down, six more to go.

(Lights flicker as a shadowy, ghostly figure suddenly appears out of the blue.)

EVERYONE: (gasps)

(Lights go back to normal and figure suddenly disappears)

RUKIA: (fearful) Please tell me you all saw that.

LELOUCH: (frozen) F-f-f-first j-j-j-jump scare t-t-t-today.

NARRATOR: I just learned that's going to happen every time you guys get a drawing, each time it'll get much more serious. That actually scared me.

(Rukia jumps into Orihime's arms.)

RUKIA: (scared) I don't want to play this game anymore!

ORIHIME: We have no choice hon. If we want to get out of here, we have to do it.

RENTON: Let's split up and look for all of them then.

SIMON: No fuck that, we're not splitting up. I've seen horror movies and I know that splitting up is a death sentence. Also, the protagonists usually go off and screw each other, and we can't have that going on because that's an even bigger death sentence.

NARRATOR: Simon has the right idea, looks like he watched the right movies.

SIMON: (smirking) I sure did.

ICHIGO: Let's get moving, the sooner we find the pages, the sooner we beat this game.

(Montage of everyone finding creepy drawings around certain parts of the mall and each time the figure keeps reappearing. They eventually find the sixth page.)

CHI: Seems like that's all the pages we could find.

SIMON: (holding a check list) But there's only six, we need to find seven.

YOKO: It's no use, we scoured every nook and cranny in this place and there's no seventh page

RENTON: Either way, we did look everywhere. (thinks for a minute) Except the main office we spawned in.

RIN: You seriously think it'll be there Renton? In the place that we spawned?

RENTON: Well what other choice do we have?

HARUHI: Well I say let's get moving before…

(Haruhi shines her flashlight at the figure who is standing right there in front of them. This time he appears much taller and more dangerous. Music gets even more dramatic.)

EVERYONE: AAAAAAHHH!

(Figure suddenly disappears)

SIMON: I think now's the time to run.

EVERYONE: No shit!

(All of them take off running back to the office while screaming and panicking. They make it back there and lock the door right behind them. Music is getting louder and louder.)

ICHIGO: (panting) Did everyone make it out alright?

EVERYONE: Uh-huh.

ICHIGO: Hold on, where's Lelouch?

(Everyone looks around and sees that Lelouch is under the table shaking in fear.)

LELOUCH: (scared) Don't ask me to come out, I'm not doing it!

ORIHIME: No more fucking around, let's tear this place apart for that picture!

(They start looking everywhere they can. The music starts to get louder and louder)

EDWARD: I'm no expert but I can tell that when the music gets louder, THAT'S THE SIGN THAT WE'RE FUCKED!

YOKO: (panicking) HURRY THE FUCK UP AND FIND THE PICTURE!

HARUHI: Listen Eureka, if this is the end for us, I have one question I need to ask you!

EUREKA: (rummaging through drawers) Make it quick Haruhi, our time is precious!

HARUHI: (points down) What is that thing?

(Eureka turns to her confused)

EUREKA: Huh?

HARUHI: What is that thing?

EUREKA: What are you talking about?

HARUHI: That! That thing around your thigh!

(Eureka looks down at the weapon holster/thigh strap wrapped around her leg)

EUREKA: (awkwardly) It's a weapon holster.

HARUHI: Well it doesn't have a weapon, so why are you wearing it?

EUREKA: Uh, I don't know. Because I think it looks good on me.

HARUHI: I don't think weapon holsters really make you look better Eureka!

EUREKA: (irritated) Hey, what gives you the right to question my choices in fashion Haruhi!?

HARUHI: Probably because your choices in fashion are retarded!

(The two go back and forth arguing. The loud music has suddenly stopped, everyone takes notice.)

RENTON: You two shut up! (Eureka and Haruhi stop) Listen, it's quiet.

SHINJI: Do you guys hear it?

RUKIA: Yeah, the music suddenly stopped.

ANEMONE: I'm not liking this. It's way too quiet.

ICHIGO: Shh. (walks to the door) Let me check.

(Ichigo slowly opens the door)

YUKIO: Is there anything there?

ICHIGO: No, it's gone. I think it's safe to go outside now.

EVERYONE: (sighs in relief)

ICHIGO: (wipes his brow) Phew, for a second there I thought we were going to…

(Terrifying figure appears out of nowhere in front of Ichigo.)

EVERYONE: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH!

ICHIGO: GET UNDER THE TABLE!

(All of them run under the table where Lelouch is hiding.)

LELOUCH: (high pitched squeal with his eyes closed)

SHINJI: This is it, we're going to die. All because we couldn't find a fucking drawing!

RENTON: Where is that fucking piece of paper!?

RIN: I did find some paper.

(Everybody perks up)

EVERYONE: Really!?

RIN: Yeah (holds up a box of tissues)

(Everyone looks at him with annoyed faces.)

LELOUCH: Give me some of those. (wipes his face of tears.)

YOKO: We are so completely fucked! If Kamina was here he'd… (starts crying)

EUREKA: Why does that choke you up so much? At least he lived a good life.

YOKO: (sobbing) We were supposed to have blue and red-haired sniper babies. It was gonna be so cute.

SIMON: (pulls out his checklist) Why couldn't it just…hold on. (takes the paper off his clipboard.) Holy shit.

CHI: What is it?

(Simon holds up the paper, revealing it to be the final drawing.)

SIMON: I had the last drawing on me the whole time! I was using it as a checklist!

(Everyone looks at him with wide eyes and shocked faces before they all sigh in relief.)

RENTON: Oh my God, that was so anticlimactic, but I don't care.

ORIHIME: It's all over. We're saved. Now what?

EDWARD: I guess we can just get up and leave now.

(All get up from the spot and are about to leave the room. The figure suddenly appears again right next to them.)

EVERYONE: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHH!

(They all scream as the screen distorts to static. They all reappear back at the loading screen.)

LELOUCH: That scared the complete shit out of me!

YUKIO: Way too fucked up for my taste.

RIN: Right there with you bro. (quietly) Those liars trying to pass cheap margarine as genuine exotic butters.

YUKIO: (whisper) So goddamn stupid.

RUKIA: I don't think I'm going to play Five Night's at Freddy's or Slender for a long time.

ORIHIME: You're kidding. You didn't play any of them to begin with. You can't stand playing a horror game.

RUKIA: (whimpering) Now I can't stand them even more.

EDWARD: Okay, what's the next type of game.

NARRATOR: We're about to find out. Here we go.

(Simulation changes again. This time they're in an operating room, all dressed in medical clothing. Ichigo is lying on top of an operating table with his heart open.)

EVERYONE: Oh no.

NARRATOR: A surgeon type game. These things are hell to complete.

ORIHIME: Especially if you don't have a medical degree.

RUKIA: Ichigo, how are you feeling?

ICHIGO: I can't feel anything at all. I don't understand why I'm awake though. Actually, on another note, why do I have to be the patient?

NARRATOR: It just chooses a random person Ichigo.

RENTON: So, I guess the main objective is to do open-heart surgery.

(Camera pans over to Yukio who just found a briefcase with a new heart on the table.)

YUKIO: Uh Renton, it's not open-heart surgery. We're doing a heart transplant.

LELOUCH: Oh fuck me.

ANEMONE: Is it possible to actually transfer a heart to someone else?

YOKO: Yeah, it's not impossible. Doctors have done it successfully before.

CHI: Yes, heart surgery has become widely advanced. The life expectancy of the patient tends to differ depending on situations, but the process of transferring one heart to another body has proven successful in recent years.

EUREKA: The former vice president Dick Cheney got one and he's still alive. For how long I don't know, but he's still alive.

RIN: He's still here and he still hates drugs.

SHINJI: Rin that was Nixon.

RIN: Shut up Shinji.

EDWARD: We can handle this. We just need to find a way to carefully remove the heart and then put the new one inside, right?

NARRATOR: That's correct.

EUREKA: Edward, how do you know so much?

EDWARD: Alchemy, science, duh.

NARRATOR: Either way he's got it down. Just remember that if the surgery fails, you have to start over again. Keep an eye on the blood level there.

LELOUCH: Well then, let's get to work.

ICHIGO: Haruhi, what are you doing?

(Cuts and shows Haruhi is poking Ichigo's heart.)

ICHIGO: Haruhi, are you sure you should be poking it like that.

HARUHI: Who's the doctor here?

(Blood then spurts out of Ichigo's heart. Everyone panics.)

RENTON: HURRY! SOMEONE CAUTERIZE IT!

RIN: I got it!

(Rin uses his blue flames to cauterize the heart wound.)

YOKO: That was too close.

EUREKA: Haruhi, do not poke his heart again!

HARUHI: What do you mean again? I got a whole poking kit right here. (takes out a game box that says "Poking Fun")

ICHIGO: (scared) What?

HARUHI: Ain't I a stinker?

YUKIO: Haruhi go to the corner.

HARUHI: But…

YUKIO: CORNER!

(Haruhi hangs her head and goes to the corner.)

ICHIGO: I'm fine. Don't worry guys, I'm not dying anytime soon.

(Shinji's holding a scalpel.)

SHINJI: That's debatable.

YUKIO: Shinji you get in the corner too. Now.

SHINJI: (shrugs) Okay.

SIMON: This is going to be possibly the longest surgery ever in medical history.

HARUHI: I got a camera if you guys wanna record it.

SHINJI: Yeah, we can document it.

EVERYONE: Shut up Haruhi and Shinji!

(Shows multiple attempts to perform the surgery with hilarious results. Eventually they get close to finishing it. Ichigo's blood level is dropping fast.)

YUKIO: Okay, we got the heart out. (takes the new heart and puts it in) Get the fuck in there.

(Nothing happens)

EDWARD: What the hell!?

SIMON: We got it in!?

RIN: (takes the heart out and slams it back in repeatedly) GET THE FUCK IN THERE!

LELOUCH: Seriously, what does it want from us!?

RUKIA: (worried) Please Ichigo, just hang on.

ICHIGO: (weakly) I…I can't see completely well.

EUREKA: We don't have much time; his blood level is dropping fast!

RENTON: We got to hurry or we're gonna lose!

ICHIGO: (weakly) Guys…I'm not…I'm not gonna make it.

RUKIA: (crying) Please don't die Ichigo! Please don't die!

ORIHIME: You better hang on you son of a bitch! You're not dying on my watch!

HARUHI: Wow, she's demanding.

ANEMONE: We're not gonna make it. Ichigo's dead. He's totally de—

(The heart goes in correctly, they beat the game.)

EVERYONE: YES!

ICHIGO: Thank you Lord, I still have a couple years left.

RUKIA: (hugs Ichigo) Oh Ichigo, I'm so glad you're alright.

ICHIGO: Uh Rukia, you're gonna ruin my new heart.

(Rukia pulls away blushing)

RUKIA: Sorry.

NARRATOR: Great job guys. You did it!

EVERYONE: (sighs in relief.)

(They get transported back to the simulation.)

SIMON: I feel bad for all the doctors that have done heart transplants.

HARUHI: You know, I think I'll go get a medical degree and become a surgeon. That was fun!

EUREKA: God forgive all the people who end up the patient of Surgeon Haruhi Suzumiya.

ANEMONE: Amen.

ICHIGO: Okay Narrator, I think we've had enough of this simulation for now. Can we leave?

NARRATOR: Not yet, you have one more simulation to go into and then we're done. And luckily this one will be easy.

SIMON: I can highly doubt that.

NARRATOR: I'm really sorry guys, I don't expect it to go this way. It's the producers running the show here, not me.

RENTON: That doesn't make it better!

(The screen loads and sends them into a side-scrolling game, similar to Super Mario Bros. and Sonic the Hedgehog.)

CHI: Basic side scrolling video game.

NARRATOR: It's simple, just make it to the end of this stage and you'll be fine. You each get three lives, if you all run out of lives. You start the stage over again.

SHINJI: Well let's go then.

LELOUCH: Hold on Shinji.

(Shinji takes off running and tries to jump over the gap. He jumps too early and falls down the pit.)

SHINJI: AAH!

RIN: I have nothing to say for that. That's just hilarious.

(Shinji respawns.)

SHINJI: Okay I can't blame the game for that, that was a pretty jackass move.

RENTON: How about I try it? (Renton jumps over the gap and does it flawlessly.) Made it through.

(Everyone else follows suit.)

YOKO: This seems a lot easier than I imagined it to be.

EUREKA: Yeah, maybe we'll make it through this quicker than we think.

(Next couple minutes show a montage of everyone dying and respawning at certain parts of the level. Each time, they end up respawning. After what seems like so many deaths, they manage to make it to the end of the level. By this point in time, they all look totally exhausted.)

EVERYONE: (panting and gasping for breath)

NARRATOR: Be prepared guys, you still have a boss to get through.

EVERYONE: (annoyed) AWW!

(The boss appears in front of them, looking both menacing and terrifying.)

BOSS: Be prepared players. I am the most difficult enemy you will ever encounter in this game. You'll never make it past me, no matter how hard you try.

(2 minutes later)

BOSS: (beaten up and groaning on the ground)

RENTON: There we beat him; can we please go now?

NARRATOR: Okay, I think that's enough for today. Let's all head back to the house.

EVERYONE: FINALLY!

(They are all transported back to the house where they all have their helmets still on.)

NARRATOR: That's it everyone. Helmets off. So, did you guys have a fun time at all?

(Everyone shrugs and nods for the most part.)

NARRATOR: Well I'm glad you all had a fun time, but I think that's enough for today. Actually, looking outside now, it's almost time for dinner.

ORIHIME: Oh yeah, I gotta do an update on my blog right now. Hey Ichigo, can I borrow your laptop?

ICHIGO: Yeah sure, it's in the kitchen.

ORIHIME: Thanks.

(Orihime gets up and goes to the kitchen.)

RIN: Hey can we get something to eat? I'm dying of hunger.

(Shinji's eyes go wide in shock)

SHINJI: Dying?

NARRATOR: You okay Shinji?

(The scene goes into Shinji's psyche as we see the scenes from the shooter level played back in his mind. All the death and destruction that happened before plays out in his head.)

SHINJI: AAAAAAAHH!

(Shinji runs to the window and jumps out.)

NARRATOR: What the hell just happened?

YUKIO: Well, given my basic understanding of psychology, it looks like he got some PTSD from the war level.

ANEMONE: (looks out window) Should we call an ambulance?

YOKO: Nah, it's too late for him.

ORIHIME: (from the kitchen) WHAT THE FUCK!?

RUKIA: Orihime? What happened?

(All of them run into the room. Orihime is sitting at the table looking at Ichigo's laptop with utter shock and disgust.)

LELOUCH: Orihime what's wrong?

ORIHIME: THERE'S SO MUCH PORN!

(Ichigo freezes in embarrassment as everyone looks at him with shock)

ICHIGO: How…HOW DID YOU FIND THAT!? HOW DID YOU FIND MY PRIVATE FILES!?

ORIHIME: PRIVATE FILES!? IT WAS RIGHT ON THE GODDAMN SCREEN!? THE MINUTE I OPEN IT, IT'S LOADED WITH THOUSANDS OF FUCKING PICTURES!

ICHIGO: So what's the big fucking deal! I'm a man, I can do whatever the hell I want!

ORIHIME: It's all _Bleach_ characters too, you sick bastard! Jesus Christ, I mean look at all of this, Rangiku x Haineko, Haribel x Toshiro, (gasp) ME AND RUKIA!?

(Rukia stands there in total embarrassment and shock before fainting.)

ICHIGO: (nervously shrugs) I…I…I think the correct way to say it is "Rukia and I"?

(Orihime gets up from the table and walks over to Ichigo, yelling at him while pointing at him.)

ORIHIME: (angry) YOU ARE A DISGUSTING PIECE OF SHIT! I HAVE LOST ALL OF MY FAITH IN YOU ICHIGO KUROSAKI! ALL OF MY FUCKING FAITH!

(Orihime continues to rage at Ichigo as everyone else looks on.)

EDWARD: This took a turn that I wasn't expecting.

RENTON: Well, at least they didn't...

EUREKA: (enraged) RENTON!

(Renton turns around in the living room and sees Eureka and Anemone looking at his laptop)

RENTON: (terrified) AHH! HOW DID YOU FIND THAT!?

EUREKA: YOU HAVE NUDES OF LARA CROFT, TIFA, RAYNE, SENA KASHIWAZAKI, ASUNA, LEAFA, HAKUFU, All THE GIRLS FROM HIGHSCHOOL DXD, HIGHSCHOOL OF THE DEAD, FAIRY TAIL, AND ME ON HERE!?

ANEMONE: THAT'S DISGUSTING!

RENTON: (smiles) Frankly I just thought you'd be happy to be included Eureka.

EUREKA: (looks flattered) Really? (gets angry) THEN WHAT'S WITH ALL THESE OTHER CHICKS!

RENTON: (shrugs) To balance it out?

(Eureka and Anemone tower over Renton with baseball bats.)

EUREKA and ANEMONE: YOU PERVERTED SON OF A BITCH!

RENTON: I DIDN'T MEAN IT, I'M SORRY, I'M SORRY!

(They both attack him mercilessly with the bats as he screams)

EUREKA: (beating Renton) WE'RE GONNA STRAIGHTEN YOU OUT!

ANEMONE: (beating Renton) THIS'LL FIX YOUR MESSED UP LITTLE BRAIN!

RENTON: (whimpers) I'm not messed up, I'm just horny.

(Everyone looks on at the attack)

HARUHI: (smirks) Balance it out. Maybe that's what he meant by the flat in "flattering."

(Eureka turns to Haruhi in a threatening glare.)

EUREKA: As soon as I'm done here you're next Suzumiya! (returns to beating Renton)

SIMON: I think we should end it here.

NARRATOR: Well, that was a fun episode. I'm your unseen narrator and this has been another episode of Animes Unite. We'll see you all next time.

 **Well, that was a weird ending.**

 **As said before this was one of the chapters that took the longest to write primarily due to difficulty coming up with ideas. However, when I did get the muse to write, I had fun with this chapter, particularly making a video game themed episode. I've had other plans for this in the future, though I haven't completely written them out yet.**

 **Sorry for the late updates guys, been focused a lot of midterms as well as this new voice acting project I'm a part of which will be dropping very soon.**

 **Hope you guys enjoyed the chapter, and I'll see you all next time.**

 **I own none of the above characters in the aforementioned series. Each belongs to their respective owners:**

 **Bleach is owned by Viz Media, Tite Kubo and Toei Animation  
**

 **Blue Exorcist is owned by Aniplex of America, A-1 Pictures, Kazue Kato and Tensai Okamura  
**

 **Tenga Toppa Gurren Lagann is owned by Aniplex of America, Gainax, Kazuki Nakashima, and Hiroyuki Imaishi  
**

 **Fullmetal Alchemist is owned by Aniplex of America, Funimation Entertainment, Studio Bones and Hiromu Arakawa  
**

 **Code Geass is owned by Funimation Entertainment, Sunrise,** **Ichirō Ōkouchi,** ** **Gor** **ō Taniguchi, and CLAMP  
****

 **The Melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiya is owned by Funimation Entertainment, Kyoto Animation, and Nagaru Tanigawa**

 **Chobits is owned by Funimation Entertainment, Madhouse Studios and CLAMP.**

 **Eureka Seven is owned by Funimation Entertainment, Studio Bones, and Dai Sato.**

 **Neon Genesis Evangelion is owned by AEsir Holdings, Gainax and Hideaki Anno**


End file.
